I'm very small boned, narrow across the shoulders - just have all this extra "insulation" now that I can't get rid of. I'm not nearly so worried about the bust size as I am about all the padding I have everywhere. Of course, the bust size will surely go down if I can ever manage to get the weight off.
goku - they probably teased you because they were jealous that you were thin and they might not have been.
wonko - I don't think that either extreme is good and each one has it's down sides; however having been both too small and too heavy, I think I'd have to say that the overweight is the hardest to deal with when it comes to other people because in my experience they perceive me as less attractive when I'm heavier and they are less inclined to be kind. I think that's because thin has been idealized so much by the media, movies, etc.
I do know one thing though without a doubt: what really matters is the person inside the body - the compassion and caring for others that lives within each of us is what makes us special and beautiful no matter what our size.
I've no doubt that we are all going to keep working at it and eventually find our happy medium and I'd say that it's perfectly ok for you to investigate what someone else of your stature is buying. What better way to get a grip on the new sizing system.
wonko-lol so funny i remember when i was going up in size i was so happy everytime i went to the store i got to get a bigger bra lol never thought i'd ever be so happy to be buying a bigger size of something! I am the opposite i have tiny shoulders and big arms lol looks funny now but im trying to tone them!
goku- Glad you're happy with your current decollete, sounds like you've earned that self-esteem. I'm actually glad these days to be going down in bra size. I was never a super big cup, but very big around. I have big shoulders and a broad back. Good for football, bad for fitting into bras! I'm 2 or sometimes 3 sizes bigger in tops than in slacks, so that's a pain since I can't buy 2-piece outfits that are sold as one.
barb- I'm sure you are right that many of us have been on both sides. I'm not saying one is better then the other, just hoping I find my way to the middle, and stay there! I hope you find your happy medium, too.
Luckily, the last time I was shopping I spotted a woman of similar carriage and noted which new crazy size she bought, so I think I can figure out the new system on my own. I don't normally snoop like that, but this was official business!
Wonko and Barb-People really said you looked great? I cannot immagine that! They teased me endlessly about it!! Wonko-So funny i could have been spokeswoman for IBTC too i look at my lil bras i wore bk then and the whole thing covers one of breasts now lol!! I'm not huge but im 36C so just average but its exactly its the size i dreamed to be!
wonko, I was ill once also and went down to approx 75 lbs and I couldn't believe the people who thought I looked great - never mind that my eyes and cheeks were all sunk in, etc - I guess that's what people like.
Anyway, it sounds like we've all been on both sides of the coin, so we know what it all feels like. It would be nice if people would just consider feelings before they blurt out their remarks.
Good luck with that color coding - I'm with you - it sounds pretty confusing and your privacy if important - I do hope the sales people respect your desire.
My experience as a skinny person (I was one once, in the dark ages!) was a bit different. I was too thin because I was sick. And while I could have been the spokeswoman for the IBTC (hehe), that was not the feedback I got from others. Instaed, people always told me how great I looked and wanted to know my "secret."
It was awful to hear that when I knew how unhealthy my weight was! And when I got back to a normal weight (which I sadly passed through all too quickly and resumed my life as an obese person), plenty of people did rudely comment on my weight gain. Sniff.
Having been on both extreme ends of the spectrum, which would I pick? NEITHER! I really hope to train my body and mind to get to a healthy weight in the middle.
There are pros and cons to being too skinny or too big. I'm glad people have joined in my airing of such grievances.
OK, 'nough of the heavy stuff (no pun inteded).
Here's another plus-size complaint:
Recently, a lot of the plus-size retailers have re-invented their sizing. I have NO IDEA what is going on. The numbers are all different, and there are colors corresponding to body type. I guess the goal is to have betting fitting jeans and slacks, but I'm totally confused by the new system. (It's at Lane Bryant and others.) Why can't we just have waist and inseem sizing, with a few different cuts? The clerks seem all excited to assist me by measuring me and figuring out my new number/color size. Persoanlly, when I'm shopping for my big lady jeans, I want as little attention as possible!!!!
I totally get what you guys are saying so im NOT here to insult any1 but trust me when i was at 105lbs all i heard what oh u are so flat oh you have no breasts oh you have no butt it went on and on lol!! So even though i complain about my "vanity" lbs i have now and i am trying to be a weight im happy at (i am trying to tone myself as well) i would not change the fact i gained enough weight to give me some curves and some breast! After i had gained some weight and was actually getting to wear a "real" bra i went to see my family and my cousin who always picked on me for having A size breasts was like OMG you have boobs lol!! It was super funny!! I was like YEP i sure do no more IBTC (hopefully yall know what that means) for me!! At any rate just wanted to share my story and wish you girls luck in your weight loss!! Dont be ashamed for having big breasts or curves for that matter!! I dont think being skinny with no curves is worth it! It justs looks wrong to me!!
Don't get me started on the bust/waist issue!!. I've always been -- let's say "well endowed" and I once went into a department store and asked for a size 32D bra (this was when I was young and petite). The sales lady looked at me and said "NOBODY wears that size". I simply said, "I do" and left the store. How's that for rudeness??
People just don't think before they open their big mouths!!
I, too, have a hard time finding clothes that fit right because do I have larger bust, but am very narrow across the shoulders, so if I buy something that doesn't smash "the girls", the neckline is big enough to look right in.
My biggest pet peeve is the clothes. I am only 5'2 and probably a C-D bust. If I buy anything plus size that fits my waist then the neck line is huge and I would flash about a hundred people. How big do they need to make the bust. My boobs haven't gotten bigger just my belly lol. Also even if I buy petite jeans to fit my waist that are plus size I look like MC Hammer cause the thighs are so baggy. I ust want to find clothes that actually fit whether they are plus size or not.
I hate it when I order something healthy from a restaurant or order something and have to modify it to make it healthy cause the waiter just looks at you like "honey your already overweight just order the cheeseburger like you want". Probably me being paranoid but still it *****!
You make a good point. It doesn't matter what section you shop in, if your size has changed it can still make you uncomfortable and subject to rudeness.
Having a medical reason for your weight change must make it all the more obnoxious.
I've never mentioned weight gain in others, and only mention weight loss if I'm pretty sure it is intentional.
Ok - I'm not "plus size" but am only 5' tall and approx 30 lbs overweight and believe me, I run into the same things. I always used to be very small - around 105-115 (until thyroid problem popped up) and now I guess my pet peeve is "Oh my, have you ever put on the weight since I saw you last". Don't people realize how rude this is?? Don't they ever stop to consider that there might be a reason for this besides just not pushing away from the table soon enough?? Another thing that bugs me is: "Well after all you are getting older, so you should expect to gain weight". Where is it written that just because someone passes 40 (or 45 or whatever magical age) they have to automatically gain weight?
Nurses at the doctors office: "Oh my, you have gained a lot of weight. You need to make sure you eat better and get more exercise". (And she's more overweight than I am & hasn't yet bothered to find out that I eat very little and exercise daily).
I even got a look from my hubby last night when I treated myself to a small bowl of ice cream after an extremely stressful day (yeah, I know I didn't need it, but -------).
I don't think it matters whether how much over weight we are, if we are heavier than we should be, we are subject to the rudeness of those who are not considerate enough to take people's feelings into account before they open their mouths.
Ha! I'm 5'9", and my mom is a little over 6'. We've shared many a laugh about public restroom stalls!
Wonko, you got my brain going now ---- another pet peeve - not only am I large I am also tall. Why are all the public restroom stalls with the exception of the handicapped one built for someone 5' 2" tall and 110 pounds? I'm tired of my knees hitting the door and my hips hugging the walls. I'm done for now, ok?
Ok, and while we are talking about scales I work out at our gym at school regularly. My locker is right by the dreaded sliding balance scale. Why do women who weigh on the first notch - like at 105 pounds - feel they absolutely must move the weights back to zero so no one knows how big they are? When I get to the point I can move the big weight downward one more notch I am going to leave that weight up there for the next person to see.
Talking about scales, how about the sliding economic scale of weight loss - the cheaper the food the more calories it has. Or conversely, the healthier it is for us, the more it is going to cost. Ramen noodles, one of the cheapest foods available on earth is one of the unhealthiest things you can eat and I recent bought an apple that cost me more than 2 king-size candy bars would have.
I say food should be priced according to the number of calories it contains - the more the calories, the more we should pay! LOL