8 year old with ADHD

[alyssa1220]

My stepson was recently put on medication for ADHD. My husband and I had no idea his mother was going to do this. We noticed a huge difference. He went from being a fun-loving, active child to a depressed, withdrawn, lethargic child and has difficulty completing his sentences. We do not believe he has ADHD. When he is with his father and me, he acts like a normal 8 year old boy. He is a little hyper but nothing unusual. He and his sister have confided in us about what goes on at their mother's. His mother appears to be verbally abusive and that is when he acts out. At her house, he bangs his head off the wall and even threatened to jump out a second story window because she had said to him, "What did I do to deserve such a terrible child?". He has never exhibited this behavior with us. He also recently told me that he is hearing voices. he said they are loud when he is alone but they whisper when people are around. He also said he hears voices speaking in a different language. I am so heartbroken for this poor, sweet little boy. I need some advice. His mother has sole custody and we only see him on weekends and vacations.

[Lynnn27]

Hey just wanted to say that when my 6 yr old son started last yr on Ritalin, the dr. Started him on 10mg. I think 25mg is too high especially for a small child. Unfortunately Ritalin did not work for my son because he was dx again with having bipolar. So he is on bipolar Meds. But usually a child with ADHD does not chose when or where he is gonna misbehave, but it also sounds like his mother exasperates his condition.

[Tryin2BClean]

Here's a thought.  His dad is a parent too and can seek medical attention right?  Maybe u and dad can get AC second opinion without telling mom. Think about it.

[Sandman2]

   Very good point by allmymarbles!

[allmymarbles]

I have been reading Sandman2's comments and the advice is spot on. I would only disagree on only one point. I don't think you should not be the one to work with the mother. From a legal point of view you are an outsider, and from the mother's point of view, you may have ulterior motives. So your good intentions can be counter-productive.

The main thing is to get help for the boy. This is the job of your husband, his father. I am not saying you should stop helping your stepson, merely that you should not be visible.

[Sandman2]

   Alyssa, per my earlier comments.  You have never said how he is getting  25mgs a day.  extended release or 5mg/5 times a day or ?  You need to know exactly what he is taking!
   the one thing that I can say from years of reading posts on this board - and also doing research.  If you give a kid without ADHD 25 mgs (no matter what the dose), he will not be tired and sluggish - he will be off the wall. His reaction is really a fairly good indicator he has ADHD.  Its also  a pretty good sign he is getting an overdose.  My other thought is - is he taking any other meds  ( different looking pills) when he is at your house?  also take a look at the pills he has got to be bringing with him to your house.  Post what is written on the pill and I will tell you what he is taking!

[alyssa1220]

Thank you very much and I am worried he has been misdiagnosed. And his mother is very verbally abusive and I believe that is why she is not seeking the help he needs. It has been a few weeks since he started taking the pills and I wanted to see if he had adapted to them but he is still very sluggish, not eating, hearing voices, and depressed. Whenever he would do his homework at our house, he was focused. He would sit down and read or cuddle up to us when watching a movie. I think there is a deeper issue and I am so worried. He is a tiny boy so why would he be on 25 mgs a day?