Should we be concrened about our 4 year old's behavior?

[iellemarie]

Our four year old son is very outgoing.  He is trustng, sweet, kind, affectionate and starting to imitate us more.  He has a good vocabulary, but is not reading yet, or identifying numbers.  On that note, I am wondering if he is taking after his father's (either ADD or ADHD) and/or his mother's (my) Manic, anxiety tendencies/ways.  He was in daycare with the same girl who taught him SO much from age 6 months to 3 years.  He has been home with me the past year....not a very structured environment as myself and his dad work part (or full) time and I am in school full time as well.  

This is what I have noticed/heard:  His camp (teen) instructors for two weeks this summer claimed that "rather do hat is asked of him, he asks a lot of questions".  He just started a half day preschool where he attended camp and I have heard nothing like this...BUT tonight was his third T-Bal practice....The forst I took him to and he was a little distractable.  The second, his dad ltook him to and they left in 20 minutes as he rather play with rocks and ONY bat the ball...he was not having the outfield thing.  This time (tonight), he was more distractable...walking off, staring at planes, blowing mommy kisses, and laying on the bases and bench rather thn patiently waiting his turn (as it seemed MOST of the other kids were doing.)  

Furthermore, it seems I tell him to do things REPEATEDLY and have to threaten punishment for him to comply with requests like throwing his trash away, getting dressed, closing doors..anything.  

He still wears a pull-up at night and until recently (3 weeks now) seemed perfectly potty trained.  After over a year of almost no daytime accidents, he is peeing his pants three times a day.. It seems he just is so caught up in what he is doing that he can't bother stopping to go to the bathroom.

What do you think?!?!?  I do not want to keep mentioning things to his teachers (especially history) because of the fear that I may be overreacting and then placing a label on him that may not need be placed?!??!

[Sandman2]

  Agree with todd30 completely.  Also t-ball is probably the most "stand around" sport going.  Try something like soccer.
   By the way, if something he is doing or not doing - don't "threaten".  Immediately give him a short timeout and be consistent about it.  And pick only one or two things to work on.  Threatening, just gives him a chance to figure out how to avoid the situation a bit longer.
Best wishes.

[todd30]

Sounds like a normal 4yr old to me.  The potty training thing could be him just being a bit lazy. There are some kids that pee their pants until they are like 10! Kids with real problems wont comply even after being threatened with a punishment. Your son sounds alot like my nephew who is close in age. He might also not be interested in sports. Alot of kids arent at that age. Take as much time as you can doing the things he likes to do at this age. If he wants to act all crazy act all crazy with him, Laugh with him! Dont be one of those parents who wants her kid to be just like the others! I'm sure there are alot of mothers who would kill to have their little boys blowing kisses at their mom!  Don't mention things to the teachers yet. If there is a problem later on in school then you can talk to teachers but your right about labels. And at this age kids are crazy!! they are 4!