Addicted to Vicodin and scared to be sober and go through withdrawal

[backpacker102]

Ive come to the point where I stopped taking legally prescribed Vicodin because of pain and started taking it more so for the high. I started with 1 Vicodin here and there about 5 months ago and now im up to 6 Vicodin HP at once..and thats it for the day. Does it mean that I wouldnt want more? No .  I just havent been taking more than that. I have 6 herniated discs and this is what the doc prescribed. Due to the location, PT and surgery are not options. I've grown comfortable taking my pills and being silly online or reading..basically not leaving the house. I know these pills are a dead end to my brain and any prosperity in life, yet i keep taking them. I have tried to stop, but the diarrhea and instant depression are what gets me back on them again. I dont have a girlfriend, family support or anything like that. Its me and my pets. I feel like a fool for ever taking one. I haven't done anything illegal to get the pills, but I dont want to get to that point either. How do I make the withdrawal more tolerable? I have legal access to Klonopin, and some muscle relaxers. I want to be a normal person without an infatuation with stupid pills. They have ruined my social life, work and really havent done anything good besides take away my back pain. I have been to NA meetings and did not feel comfortable or get anything from them. No offense to anyone that likes them or benefits from them. I want to be sober, but essentially im scared of the road to get there.

[17mthssober275]

The best thing you can do is be clean, I think we are all scared in the beginning, we are so used to the way it was, but I have 680 days and life keeps getting better, I describe my being clean and sober as "like being out of prison". Free to go and do anything at any time. Keep clean, you will be happy.

[julez111]

Hi hellonj! Does the nj stand for New Jersey because that is where I live myself. Anyways I am sorry to hear what you are going threw! I am a past drug user to and was addicted to roxy 30s but started out on perks 5mg and got myself up to 80mg Oxys but been clean for 2 years now. I think you could have a easy transfer if you truly try to get off because you are not taken a very high typ of pain med. Have you thought about trying suboxone to get off the pills? Suboxone is such a life saver but only if you do it the right way and use them to get off the pills and not stay on the subs because you will become addicted to those as well but they do help they really do and they keep you out on WD. Meetings really do help I was also a person before that said they weren't for me but of course you feel that way while your usen. I have a question? I been seeing on here people been talking about the Thomas recipe. Do you by any chance know what that is?

[quitinoxys]

I agree with atthebeach (and btw the way hello). After you are off the pills for a month or so your pain level decreases. When you first stop your brain is so use to the drug it will send false signals so it gets feed the drug. I know when I quit I was amazed how much less I hurt wihout the meds. Also yoga, breathing, acupuncture etc; helps a great deal. Hang in there you are doing great.

[helpmymarriage]

I have stopped taking then again. They are no good. I just hope it's not to late.

[atthebeach]

to find out the different between opiate induced pain and the real pain can take a month or two off of the opiates. at that point is when you can  re- evaluate the pain.
have you considered alter methods of pain management, non narcotic?
exercise, hydro therapy, acupuncture, massage, chiropractor,
stretching, yoga, swimming.
there are many types of injections, stimulations.
if overweight, losing weight, healthy diet, vitamins, new mattress.
you are doing great, keep moving forward.

@helpmymarriage, good to see you again. did you totally stop the trams yet?  taking your wife to your appts is a good idea, it will help with accountability, have you set up any counseling yet?

keep the faith...

[helpmymarriage]

Thank you, and yes lying and secrets do become huge issues, I've learned this. And it's just not who I am. It saddens me to no extent to know what I've done. She was honest to me about some things that she didn't want to be. I need to do what I can to make this work and keep being honest. I'm not a dishonest peson.