Aa
Broken heart?
How does one cope with a loss that makes you cry, makes your heart ache? Make you wish you were't around?
Not depression, that's usually an emotion brought on by many things. How does/has anyone been able to deal with a broken heart, that can't be fixed by anything but time? I'm at a real low point in life right now..I want to type more, but don't know what to write.
Not depression, that's usually an emotion brought on by many things. How does/has anyone been able to deal with a broken heart, that can't be fixed by anything but time? I'm at a real low point in life right now..I want to type more, but don't know what to write.
I think Richard is awesome too!! ;)
I'm so sorry Twist to hear what you are going through, and I have to offer up some insider knowledge on this topic as this is my year of experiencing deaths of people that are my very foundation. I lost my beloved Dad to an ugly ugly fight to bone cancer. Not 3 weeks later, my very healthy, walked 5 miles a day 88 year old grandfather ( my mom's dad), whom helped raise me after my parents divorce, had a seizure and they found a 3cm malignant cancerous brain tumor. Gave him 2 months. I was angry hurt and in disbelief. I almost let my father's death take my own life from me.,.i wanted to die and be with him at one point. Now this..Not right. I have a 3 year old that needs me. I was shoving Percocet in my mouth like there was no tomorrow. Did it help? I thought so at time, now I look back I was completely OUT OF CONTROL, crying, worrying my sister who was also grieving,worrying everyone about my mental state. (They did not know about my addiction at the time.). That was not fair of me to do to everyone when they had their own grief about my Dad. Think of that special person you lost...what would THEY want for you...I bet they would want you to choose life, not these pills. You really have to think about that. I know it's so hard, my heart hurts writing this. Try to think of it like this...honor that person that you loved so very much by living your life in the way they would want for you. That's what gets me through. Your heart will take time, but it will heal. It's a necessary part to go through the grieving process, I'm sorry. But it will get better. My Dad passed on April 11, and I still mourn for him, but I'm not stuck in the hard grief stage anymore. It took a lot of thought and eating books about life and death. Do whatever it takes. But the pills make it worse. I really see that now that I look back and reflect. Good luck and sending you hugs.
I'm so sorry Twist to hear what you are going through, and I have to offer up some insider knowledge on this topic as this is my year of experiencing deaths of people that are my very foundation. I lost my beloved Dad to an ugly ugly fight to bone cancer. Not 3 weeks later, my very healthy, walked 5 miles a day 88 year old grandfather ( my mom's dad), whom helped raise me after my parents divorce, had a seizure and they found a 3cm malignant cancerous brain tumor. Gave him 2 months. I was angry hurt and in disbelief. I almost let my father's death take my own life from me.,.i wanted to die and be with him at one point. Now this..Not right. I have a 3 year old that needs me. I was shoving Percocet in my mouth like there was no tomorrow. Did it help? I thought so at time, now I look back I was completely OUT OF CONTROL, crying, worrying my sister who was also grieving,worrying everyone about my mental state. (They did not know about my addiction at the time.). That was not fair of me to do to everyone when they had their own grief about my Dad. Think of that special person you lost...what would THEY want for you...I bet they would want you to choose life, not these pills. You really have to think about that. I know it's so hard, my heart hurts writing this. Try to think of it like this...honor that person that you loved so very much by living your life in the way they would want for you. That's what gets me through. Your heart will take time, but it will heal. It's a necessary part to go through the grieving process, I'm sorry. But it will get better. My Dad passed on April 11, and I still mourn for him, but I'm not stuck in the hard grief stage anymore. It took a lot of thought and eating books about life and death. Do whatever it takes. But the pills make it worse. I really see that now that I look back and reflect. Good luck and sending you hugs.
It must be said -- Ricart IS rather awesome -- Puff away, Ric, Puff, Puff -- Puff away -- Looks like you're as appreciated in other quarters as you are by this particular, bedraggled nestling. Thanks, as always.
All Apologies Twist00 for cutting in here re: Ric!
(Wishing you all the Strength, Peace & Comfort I know that it takes to deal with the type of tragedy you've been hit with!) For me, the toughest losses have been those I've been particularly close to and were taken suddenly -- inexplicably -- people that were so important to me! I know that it's devastating.
The upshot for me, has been to really try to treasure those that I still have in my life and to not assume that I'll necessarily have them around tomorrow -- to love and appreciate them today in a way that I didn't necessarily experience my friends and lovers that were snatched so unfairly from this life. (Btw, I'm in no way suggesting that you didn't appreciate the person you lost or others you value who are still around. I'm just sharing one of the ways that my terrible losses have changed the way that I now deal with those who are dear to me..)
All Apologies Twist00 for cutting in here re: Ric!
(Wishing you all the Strength, Peace & Comfort I know that it takes to deal with the type of tragedy you've been hit with!) For me, the toughest losses have been those I've been particularly close to and were taken suddenly -- inexplicably -- people that were so important to me! I know that it's devastating.
The upshot for me, has been to really try to treasure those that I still have in my life and to not assume that I'll necessarily have them around tomorrow -- to love and appreciate them today in a way that I didn't necessarily experience my friends and lovers that were snatched so unfairly from this life. (Btw, I'm in no way suggesting that you didn't appreciate the person you lost or others you value who are still around. I'm just sharing one of the ways that my terrible losses have changed the way that I now deal with those who are dear to me..)
This must be so rough and I'm so sorry for you. Sometimes you just need a quiet shoulder to cry on....someone who you can just unload on. I hope you have someone in your life like this, if not, use us here.....just unload all of those emotions on our "silent shoulder "......we will always be here to listen and console....I truly hope you feel better.
Ricart....I have wanted to say this for sometime and I hope this isn't inappropriate here but I think you deserve such credit for your hard work and excellent advice. You are always there with an encouraging word or advice and you are very valuable....thanks for taking the time to help others in need....I just wanted you to know...
Ricart....I have wanted to say this for sometime and I hope this isn't inappropriate here but I think you deserve such credit for your hard work and excellent advice. You are always there with an encouraging word or advice and you are very valuable....thanks for taking the time to help others in need....I just wanted you to know...
Thanks for all the replies, I should have been more clear so I apologize, my loss was a death, not a break up. I still appreciate anyone who thought it was a break up for their thoughts. It's the thought that counts.
This death was not something like a distance relative, or a grandmother, it was not natural, and not that I got clean for anyone but me, however if there was someone who could have influenced me at all to do so...would of been this person. The most important person in my life.
I have not yet decided on how to handle this. However, I wanted to say I appreciate EVERYONES input. Thank you all <3
This death was not something like a distance relative, or a grandmother, it was not natural, and not that I got clean for anyone but me, however if there was someone who could have influenced me at all to do so...would of been this person. The most important person in my life.
I have not yet decided on how to handle this. However, I wanted to say I appreciate EVERYONES input. Thank you all <3
I read some studies that showed that losing a love relationship was strikingly similar to the withdrawal process. With that logic I would think that this is a dangerous time for you as far as relapse goes. Keep your guard up. I know it sux to be heartbroken. Time is the main healer in the heartbreak department.
Keep up the great job you are doing staying sober. Looks to me like you will have no trouble finding someone great that would want to spend time with you.
You are young and have a lot going for you . best wishes
Keep up the great job you are doing staying sober. Looks to me like you will have no trouble finding someone great that would want to spend time with you.
You are young and have a lot going for you . best wishes
I have posted this before. Life will deliver, directly to your doorstep - wrapped up with ribbons & bows - hundreds of excuses a day to relapse. Such is life. But on the other hand, it will also bring joy and happiness beyond your wildest dreams.
So it is up to you how to deal with these things. Heartbreak takes time. It will leave an emotional scar - and it will make you strong. Use it and become a better person. And do not listen to your head right now.
So it is up to you how to deal with these things. Heartbreak takes time. It will leave an emotional scar - and it will make you strong. Use it and become a better person. And do not listen to your head right now.
each day u will get stronger. Dont wallow in the sadness. Keep positive. Surround yourself with good people that will only lift u higher and help stand u up when u feel like falling. Keep your head up. When u get thru this u will come out alot stronger and with more wisdom and will b able to help someone else one day with the exact same thing ur going thru today.
wake up every morning and tell yourself you r stronger than yesterday.
wake up every morning and tell yourself you r stronger than yesterday.
"How does/has anyone been able to deal with a broken heart, that can't be fixed by anything but time?"
I like what Annie said above in regards to journaling. Im not sure what it is that broke your heart but whether it be love or death, writing about it helps. Ive experienced much heartbreaking loss in my life and have found relief in writing. Although it is short relief...time will ultimately heal it. Maybe write your feelings to the person/thing that broke your heart. You dont have to send it but it helps to get some of those feelings out so you can deal with them. You need to process your feelings because even though time does ease the pain, if you dont deal with the issue you may end up with scarred heart. Best of luck to you.
I like what Annie said above in regards to journaling. Im not sure what it is that broke your heart but whether it be love or death, writing about it helps. Ive experienced much heartbreaking loss in my life and have found relief in writing. Although it is short relief...time will ultimately heal it. Maybe write your feelings to the person/thing that broke your heart. You dont have to send it but it helps to get some of those feelings out so you can deal with them. You need to process your feelings because even though time does ease the pain, if you dont deal with the issue you may end up with scarred heart. Best of luck to you.
Hi! And thanks for reaching out! When you say 'loss' I'm not sure if you mean a death or the end of relationship. In a way, they can amount to the same thing. While it's true that time attenuates these things, I've found that while we use drugs (and I'm not sure if you have because I haven't read your other posts.), these hurts get 'stored' inside us and tend to remain 'undigested' -- 'unprocessed'.
Recently, I've been going through a horrible emotional time where these feelings have been trying to force their way to the surface all at once. What I did (so as not to lose my mind or use) was to journal about it. My particular 'losses/broken heart' had to do with all the friends I'd lost during my long drug use and the fact that I wasn't able to grieve them at the time. A friend of mine suggested a series of 'ceremonies' to exorcise the grief and to honor them. The Journal was the first step in this process. Here's a link to it if you're interested. Maybe, it'll help:
http://www.medhelp.org/user_journals/show/779591/HAUNTED-GenXer-Survivors-Guilt
I wish you all the best. Please, know that you're not alone. We're here.
Recently, I've been going through a horrible emotional time where these feelings have been trying to force their way to the surface all at once. What I did (so as not to lose my mind or use) was to journal about it. My particular 'losses/broken heart' had to do with all the friends I'd lost during my long drug use and the fact that I wasn't able to grieve them at the time. A friend of mine suggested a series of 'ceremonies' to exorcise the grief and to honor them. The Journal was the first step in this process. Here's a link to it if you're interested. Maybe, it'll help:
http://www.medhelp.org/user_journals/show/779591/HAUNTED-GenXer-Survivors-Guilt
I wish you all the best. Please, know that you're not alone. We're here.
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I'm sure EVERYONE on here (and in the world) has had a broken heart. Good Lord I've been madly in love several times and each time my guts were ripped outta my body. It was LITERALLY all I could think about. And these were all before I discovered opiates so I felt everything. It really is (I know this *****) just time, like everything. Time does heal a broken heart. I'm sure you've been in love b4 this person and thought you would die w/o that person. But, now you feel this for another person. See, our brain changes. We move on, we evolve. Just be honest (like you are) to your friends etc. And don't say "I'm fine" when you're not. You can say I'm sad as hell and nothing is helping.
You will find that inch by inch, your mind thinks a little less about that person and you find yourself laughing or distracted or whatever. It WILL happen. THAT I can promise you.
However, if I'm reading suicidal feelings into your post, PLEASE go to a professional. I did, saved my life.
Btw, since you posted here, are you afraid of using or are you using or what's your story? No judgement at all of course, just asking for info:)