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Daughter has Roxy addiction
Can anyone HELP ME? My baby girl just turned 18 & has started taking Roxy's about 6 months ago! She asks for help one minute then denies her problem the next minute. I'm at such a loss in knowing what to do about her! She is living with her boyfriend who is a Dealer & supplies them to her. I don't want her to shut me out & lose her trust in me so she continues to talk to me!! Anyone have any suggestions? I've never had an addiction so it's hard for me to see the signs! I'm scared for her & don't know what to do! Please Help!
Thank you so much for an outsiders opinion! I left my husband of 14 yrs 10/13/08. I myself have been on many meds over the last 10 years for stress, depression. I am still on pain meds after being hit by a 24' box truck in 1/07. I was in such a FOG for years & just wanted to sleep all the time. I left my husband (which is not her bio father but he has been there for her) & I left behind my pills. I came cold turkey off of Zoloft, Wellbutrin XL, Trazadone, Oxycontin ER, Tylox, Adderall XR, Zanaflex & cut back from 4mg xanax to 1mg a day all by myself. My kids watched me be in a FOG for many years & I had to prove to myself that I could quit on my own.
My daughter dropped out of school this year & she still has a job for now. Her ex-boyfriend wrecked her car about 6 months ago & she had saved up $1700 for a new car but, due to her living with her dealer boyfriend it's ALL gone. It's so hard to just sit back & watch her make such a BIG mistake in life. I have'nt taken any action towards getting her boyfriend in trouble for supplying her with the Roxicodone yet because I'm afraid she will shut me out & that's the last thing I want. She has sent me text messages stating how she wants to get off the Roxy's but, then when I talk to her in person she says she don't have a problem. I get text stating how she needs the to get going in the morning & then text saying she wants to shoot herself & get it over with. I've locked those text in my cell just in case I can use to maybe get her Baker Acted here in Florida. Her boyfriend doesn't work. All he does is deal pills & drugs to teens & older. I feel so helpless! She has known her boyfriend for 8 years because he lived down the road. Her boyfriends house has been known as the Drug House for many years & he's 23. I have watched him prey on under age girls for years & it seems all of them ended up dropping out of school & drinking & doing drugs/pills. Now I've watched the same thing happen to my lil girl.
I even had my own near OD with oxycontin 20mg ER about 4 weeks ago & it scared me. My doctor prescribed me 2 a day & I was only taking 1 & after about 5 days of taking 1 oxy a day I had all the symtoms of OD'ing. I had trouble breathing & was taking shallow breathes, felt so hot, confused, & just wanted to go to sleep. I quit taking them after that cold turkey. I even talked to my girl about what I had just went through with my oxy's & told her how scared I was but, it didn't seem to sink in. I'm very scared that I'll get a call that she OD or that the boyfriends house gets busted & she ends up with a Major charge on her record for possession of pills.
She has just started asking for $ but, I won't enable her in that way. I will buy her food and such but will not give her cash. I am just a very worried mom who doesn't know what to do.
Thank you for all you help & support!!
My daughter dropped out of school this year & she still has a job for now. Her ex-boyfriend wrecked her car about 6 months ago & she had saved up $1700 for a new car but, due to her living with her dealer boyfriend it's ALL gone. It's so hard to just sit back & watch her make such a BIG mistake in life. I have'nt taken any action towards getting her boyfriend in trouble for supplying her with the Roxicodone yet because I'm afraid she will shut me out & that's the last thing I want. She has sent me text messages stating how she wants to get off the Roxy's but, then when I talk to her in person she says she don't have a problem. I get text stating how she needs the to get going in the morning & then text saying she wants to shoot herself & get it over with. I've locked those text in my cell just in case I can use to maybe get her Baker Acted here in Florida. Her boyfriend doesn't work. All he does is deal pills & drugs to teens & older. I feel so helpless! She has known her boyfriend for 8 years because he lived down the road. Her boyfriends house has been known as the Drug House for many years & he's 23. I have watched him prey on under age girls for years & it seems all of them ended up dropping out of school & drinking & doing drugs/pills. Now I've watched the same thing happen to my lil girl.
I even had my own near OD with oxycontin 20mg ER about 4 weeks ago & it scared me. My doctor prescribed me 2 a day & I was only taking 1 & after about 5 days of taking 1 oxy a day I had all the symtoms of OD'ing. I had trouble breathing & was taking shallow breathes, felt so hot, confused, & just wanted to go to sleep. I quit taking them after that cold turkey. I even talked to my girl about what I had just went through with my oxy's & told her how scared I was but, it didn't seem to sink in. I'm very scared that I'll get a call that she OD or that the boyfriends house gets busted & she ends up with a Major charge on her record for possession of pills.
She has just started asking for $ but, I won't enable her in that way. I will buy her food and such but will not give her cash. I am just a very worried mom who doesn't know what to do.
Thank you for all you help & support!!
Sorry to hear about this. It's too bad she is of age, otherwise you could lock her butt in the house.
Your initial line of thought about scaring her off and losing her trust is dead on. You need to approach this very carefully. Whatever you decide to do, reinforce your love for her. It goes without saying that whatever you do, as long as she is living with her dealer nothing will do much good. Try to give her some incentive to come home and get clean. It might be worth bribing her with a free place to stay, strong love and support and maybe some type of reward if she follows through.
I am only 26 now and remember just how stupid I was when I was her age. You gotta find a way to get her home before it gets worse. Keep us posted and don't be afraid to ask any questions you may have.
Good luck.
<Matt
Your initial line of thought about scaring her off and losing her trust is dead on. You need to approach this very carefully. Whatever you decide to do, reinforce your love for her. It goes without saying that whatever you do, as long as she is living with her dealer nothing will do much good. Try to give her some incentive to come home and get clean. It might be worth bribing her with a free place to stay, strong love and support and maybe some type of reward if she follows through.
I am only 26 now and remember just how stupid I was when I was her age. You gotta find a way to get her home before it gets worse. Keep us posted and don't be afraid to ask any questions you may have.
Good luck.
<Matt
he, well im truly sry for wht u going thu well if u are positive her bf is dealing the pills u can always call police with an annomoys(spelling) tip tell the police about what he is doing ull wana give the police as much info as u can. mayb he wil get caught and she will have to come home to u and wana get sumhelp,just dont ket anyone know that u called police on him ok. good luck and inthe previous post if u answered sum of the Qs it mite b beter for sum people to help u if we got all the facts.
I'm very sorry to hear about you situation. It is hard to be a mom and watch your kid hurt themselves. Like Lee said: You want to keep the lines of communication open but do not enable her. That will make things so much worse. She has to want to quit-nobody can make her. She has to want to get out of the situation she is in with the drug dealer boyfriend-you can't make her leave.
You are in a very difficult position and I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. Can you give somemore backround info so we recovering addicts may better assess the situation? Does she have a job? school? car? who bought the car? who pays the insurance? does the bfriend have a 'real' job? do they ask you for $? what prompted her to tell you she was popping pills? are they forging scripts? buying them from others? how many a day is she taking (do you know?)
I'm not prying-just trying to help. Sometimes pooring your heart out helps a bit and it helps us help you.
Hang in there. You are doing the right thing by seeking as much information as you can.
Let your daughter know you are not there to judge.
Stay strong and keep posting...we will help you through this and hopefully can help you figure out how to get your daughter some help.
Would she be willing to sign on to the forum and read our posts? she could just lurk. I lurked for a long time before I wrote....after a while I realized I wasn't alone in my addiction and there were people I could talk to. It also helped me see what an ugly path I was potentially heading down.
Please let us know and please keep posting.
Greebs
You are in a very difficult position and I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. Can you give somemore backround info so we recovering addicts may better assess the situation? Does she have a job? school? car? who bought the car? who pays the insurance? does the bfriend have a 'real' job? do they ask you for $? what prompted her to tell you she was popping pills? are they forging scripts? buying them from others? how many a day is she taking (do you know?)
I'm not prying-just trying to help. Sometimes pooring your heart out helps a bit and it helps us help you.
Hang in there. You are doing the right thing by seeking as much information as you can.
Let your daughter know you are not there to judge.
Stay strong and keep posting...we will help you through this and hopefully can help you figure out how to get your daughter some help.
Would she be willing to sign on to the forum and read our posts? she could just lurk. I lurked for a long time before I wrote....after a while I realized I wasn't alone in my addiction and there were people I could talk to. It also helped me see what an ugly path I was potentially heading down.
Please let us know and please keep posting.
Greebs
hey i am sorrry to hear about your problem. All you can do for her at this time is be there for her without enableing her. Its hard for people in your place. There is a group for ones that find them selves in your place its call al-anone(not sure of spelling) its for family of addicts. She needs to get away from this guy, but you can not be to pushy or you might push her away. Keep the line of communication open with her and hopefully she will come to her senses and come to you for help. Be there for her
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