Dealing with a relapse

[gizzy32]

im guessing almost everyone here has relpased at least once, if not many times. the feelings that come after a relapse can be hard to deal with. i think that it mostly stems from guilt. from guilt comes anger, irratibility, negative thoughts and sometimes self pitty. my relapses usually lasted weeks or months and it was so hard to get back up. im still not sure how to deal with all these feelings, but it does NOT get easier, it just makes the next relapse that much harder. i guess the fact is after relapsing you can't go back and change it. you have two options, keep using and get deeper and deeper in, or no matter how bad u feel about yourself, get back up and move on. learn from your mistakes and do something about it. im still pissed off at myself, but at least i feel better now and i won't give up. boy this disease is one sneaky *****. any advice on the guilt issue???? maybe it just takes time.

[marcatj]

just keep movin, buddy... just keep moving forward.

all you can do - without beating yourself up, because this is HARD - is look at how it happened last time, and what triggered it.

and if you can't avoid the trigger, look at ways to "protect" yourself, when those triggers hit... how to get through them, without using.

you're gettin' there bud....

:)
mj

[worried878]

Giz....yes...i think most haveused at least once after quitting...u really give urself a hard time about it and that is probably good as it will probably keep u clean!   u must have high values and a heart of gold....it is very un-nerving to be done in by a substance that u pick up and ingest all by yourself even when u dont want to do it...it challenges my values, strength and will power....not a good feeling at all...for no one i would think that really has made their mind up to quit or has suffered due to drug use...u r always gonna be ok ...u care enu to give some extra back to others who need it

[EmilyPost]

Yes, oh yes, I've tried to get off certain drugs and ended up relapsing. Of course. I just think you know, one day is one day. Today is another day.

So you are right.

You have only two choices.

Stay clean

Or use

You are choosing to stay clean. SO YAY!

Guilt and remorse and self blame are better shifted to anger at the actual drug or addiction. More helpful to get me though it all at least. You are such a kind and giving man. I saw you reply to the nice 13 year old girl who wanted her dad to stop smking pot.

If you have a voice like that that is so kind inside of you; I really feel that you can use that inner voice to benefit yourself as well! Instead of beating yourself up with guilt realize that all of us here have done it and we're on a journey. We're all together, trying to get healthy and quit.

Be kind to youself if you can manage it. The anger belongs directly at the drug and the addiction. You are a kind and generous person who deserves a life without soul-killing drugs! I know you would never ever be as mean to me about a relapse as you are probably being to youself. Or any stranger on the street. You deserve your own love and your own kindness as well.

My very best;
Emily

[mimi1313]

Guilt is good to a certain degree, it holds you accountable for your actions. Obviuosly you can't let it eat you up. So remember what you did but don't obsesse over it. Its a fine line, good luck!!

Melissa

[gizzy32]

that's coke for ya, been there done that, it impossible for me to do just one. kinda like the lay's potato chip commercial. betcha can't sniff just  one. **** that, no more. we shook.

[Coolio Hernendez]

DEAL....we just shook on it......Check it out. This girl who sang in a band i was in (that fell apart due to drugs) called and asked if i could talk to " Frank White " for her.....after a bunch of calls i went ahead and got it. She was gonna come right down so there were no worries.....Then she called and said " im coming down for band practice...new band...tomorrow so i will just grab it then "   Well thats the worst thing in the world that could have happened....So i put it in the garage....then i said well i'll just take a bump and then she wont notice and everything will be great....Then i said well i'll just hit it one more time and take 10 bucks off. and so on.....then it was 12:00pm and there was nothing left and i was downing vodka and ambien to put myself down....Just like the old days...

[gizzy32]

hey man, glad to see u back on here. lets make a deal, no more of the devil's dust and being stupid, lol. don't know wha't going on with the pills for ya, but hope your doing much better. hang in there buddy.

[Coolio Hernendez]

Hang in there dude.....I still think you are the man......If anyone can do it...you can...

For real dude you have helped me big time......And seeing that you fell off the wagon just makes you more human in my eyes.....and i think it will make your advice that much more helpful....

[bobby139]

If we didnt have guilt we would never grow, so guilt can be good if you use it right, dont dwell on it use it the next time you have those strong cravings, remember the guilt you are feeling...BUT also remember all the good you have done also, that is the most important, you have fought alot of cravings and won so try to think of it that way, you have won more then the drug has...you will win the war my friend you have it in you, i know you do.
hugs
bobby

[dominosarah]

dont let the guilt eat you up. Look at your triggers and face them head on. We learn by our mistakes.  You came back after 1 night.  That is something to be proud of.  You are a great asset to this forum.  Get rid of the guilt...it happened and now you know what you need to do.  You can do this so stay strong.                 sara

[soreadytodetox]

thats right girlfriend get up, brush off and hold your head up and statr againjust like jen said it was only 1 day and you took hold and the responsibility of your actions atleast you got it back under control! i know how you feel i relasped so many times it wasnt even funny banymore! at lease 15 times in the 4 yrs i was using i just had to take time off from work, and ct on may 19 and that ended a 4 yr. snorting percs habit i was using anywhere from 100-200mg everyday 365 days a yr. i was so addicted!!! but i finally bite the bullet, im here for you and so is everyone here! hope you liked the poem!!!  i know the guilt is  strong but it will ease with time! just remember to stay strong & possitive and you will be fine!! friends always sherri you know you still have so much to give on this forum you do your helping others in the same situation THAT YOU ARE IN YOU CAN HELP THEM!!!! they need your help!!!! FRIENDS SHERRI

[wannabefree330]

straight from the dictionary:  Guilt is a cognitive or an emotional experience that occurs when a person realizes or believes - whether justified or not - that he or she has violated a moral standard and is responsible for that violation.

Gizzy, at least you have morals and today you are able to realize that you have violated your beliefs.  The one you have violated is only yourself.  But that's the worst for us addicts.  We are our own worst critics remember that.  Don't live in it, rise above it and use it as a learning tool.  If you were still druggin' and drinkin' your morals would be out the window!  

[cathy5841]

yes, guilt eats us up...but please dont beat yourself up too much...thats what i am here for.  giz, you are doing awesome, set backs in life make us stronger.  so draw strength and gear up for the next battle.  you will beat this...i know it.

[bandnmom]

Pick yourself up, brush yourself off and hold your head high!! No one is perfect and like you said this disease is one sneaky *****. Yes you relapsed but it was 1 night  at least it didnt last a month or more like before. Be proud of yourself. You have came so far and dont let one bump in the road bring you down.