Help, husband quit smoking pot very crabby!

[lifeisbetter]

OK guys, I need some advice please! My husband has been a daily pot smoker since he was 13. We've been married 8 years and he's tried to quit 3 times. Never for long but always a complete jerk to my kids and myself  but, I used to have my pills to escape his extreme irritability. Well he quit again 2 weeks ago. It sucks!!! He's been an ass to me this whole time but he wants me to be with him to make him feel better,if you know what I mean. He says he'll make it up to me. It is sooo hard for me to give him a break. He lives for our kids and is the responsible one in our relationship. The problem is he lets me know it ALL THE TIME. I have never smoked pot so does anyone have any comments on how long this will last. What should I expect as far as withdrawel? He's seen me detox at home sooo many times but I was never mean to him. I should be grateful that we will both finally be clean for our kids. I think I'm afraid I'll relapse because he makes me feel so badly about myself when he's like this. I can do nothing right you know? How can I help him get through this without losing my own sanity in the meantime?

[Witchywoman]

Hang in there folks. Over the year and a half I've been on this forum, I see us go through this kind of thing periodically.

I too find it important personally that this forum remain focused on recovery issues.  I've learned though that we need to be flexible on the posts because sometimes people start to post before they admit that they have an addiction. When I first started to post, I lurked for a while and didn't post until I was ready to write the words "I am an addict".  While I was in early recovery I found it extremely tough to wade through posts that were focused on recreational use or posts from folks who discussed the joys of getting high.  It does help to keep posts focused on recovery issues, rather than have this board serve as a place to get info on drug strength etc.  But we dont' know the full story behind who posts what, and so a bit of flexibility initially is important. Someone who has a pattern of repeatedly posting about recreational use or only wants info about the effects of drugs is going to be someone I just choose to not respond to.

Groovy I totally understand your frustration.
Michael, I hope you don't leave.
I think we can just chalk this up to the differences in style we all have.  I do believe our common goal is recovery.

love to all,
WW

[hippy]

mr. michael, has been helpful and informitive , i for one am grateful,

[Hinkster]

Mrmichael hang in there bud. You offer a wealth of good info.
Hell I even read somewhere in here where someone ask if you
were a doctor. Thats the ulitmate compliment. You would be
missed. I don't think Groovey meant any harm she is just looking
out for the forum. Please think twice before you bolt. I can
always get you on the other forum, but some of these good people
who need help don't have that luxury.
Tom

[Avs]

To be completeley honest it sounded like some people, no names mentioned were high last night when they posted.  Lighten up in this room, we are here to help each other, as for as those who have problems with Thread breaing due to Question limitations, do us a favor, leave the freaking forum.

[GOD]

Sorry about the "Pissy" remark.... I think I was crabby at the time, and you do have a good point about the "Seekers"--

Anyway, Have a great day and shine on!

Jess

[Mamafeathers]

Hello, I am new here... and I am certainly not an expert but I have dealt with a fiance who was an alchoholic, so I have dealt with that sort of attitude before.  I think totally understand what you are feeling - it's tough!  I think the most important thing is for you to not LET him 'use' YOU as his 'fix'.  Easier said than done.  I guess that falls under the whole co-dependent thing, eh?  I have no shining words of advice that come to mind, except for a bunch of cliches like 'hang in there'which are probably of no help... but please know I am rooting for you and wishing both of you ALL the best!  My fiance, Steve, eventually passed away - and I am now very happily married to a terrific man - but I often think of Steve and wonder how it must have felt to be in such a place as that (addiction to alchohol), and to that extreme.  He couldn't get out of bed without a beer.  He was NEVER without a beer in his hand.  EVER.  I'm currently wondering if I am becoming addicted to Vicodin, after being given some 3 weeks ago for pain after major surgery - which is how I found this site... but that's another story, and I didn't come here to break your thread - just to show some support.  WIshing you all the best!