High Alert~

[dominosarah]

The recent events on the forum has created much sorrow and feelings of uncertainty for many of us.  Please make sure you are talking to someone about this.  Create a journal or thread, talk with your sponsor, your therapist, hit up a meeting, just dont hold these feelings in.  This is very important.  The tragedy we are all experiencing leaves many doubts.  Our own addictions are on high alert right now.  We can never take this addiction for granted.  We are all in this together and we will all get thru this together.  Bkitty has a prayer chain that spans the globe right now.  Her husband has been kind enough to make a profile and keep us all updated on her.   While we wait on her recovery we have to take care of our own recovery also~much love to you all~sara

[Ballgame]

Wait what happened?

[kyle505]

As Sarah always says - you've got to keep your guard up, no matter how many days, months, years you have clean. I see "recovery" or staying clean as a life long struggle. At least for me, my head NEVER stops talking to me. Telling my secret, as weaver posted, was the most difficult but most important thing I've ever done. Example - a family member has surgery, I know Vics will be available for me to steal, but I tell my wife about my thoughts and she's there to support me (and watch me like a hawk). I don't expect this to ever end; some situations are easier than others, but I can't kid myself in to thinking that in 5 or 10 or 15 years the addict brain will leave me be. The struggle is balanced by the joy of a clean life. No contest.

[VICourageous]

I wanted to put my 2 cents in again. All my so called friends I have known in my town for many, many years still take pills from the Doctor & off the Streets others still drink everyday! My Hub was gone during this time & my sponsor was at work! In fact mostly all my clean friends from the meetings where gone..I am so Blessed that I have 3 phone numbers from 3 Buds on here..They were the only ones I called because they knew what was going on and We could relate to it together..It did hit me hard and I was a bit scared too! So If you do have some Buds on here get their numbers.I am leaving their numbers up by our phone just in case something awful happens to me!  lol

[ariley13]

Thank you for that Sarah and Weaver. I am very new to this and it is good to be reminded that it's ok to reach out and ask questions. Sometimes I feel like what I'm dealing with is petty compared to what others are experiencing. Like right now, I am having problems with sleep again. Not that big of a deal, but annoying. It's good to know that there are so many great people on here willing to help that have been through it all before.

[weaver71]

Yeah, I've come to realize I will be in early recovery a long time. I figure I'll hit middle recovery at year 3 or so, and like you said, no feeling is petty in addiction. I have a friend in recovery who went on a 5 year relapse after 14 years in recovery. She's got 10 years again, but she stays in the middle of the circle now. She has no memory of deciding to use. We are only as sick as our secrets, we really need each other to share with, please teach out everyone. A lot of us are gone for periods, or slow down on how often they post. Me included. But I will stop what I am doing any time,If it feels important, then it is. I almost died over my secrets and isolation. Don't just post, PM a dozen people, there is always hope. It feels a lot different dealing with tragedy as a sober adult, it hurts. I am a Phoenix, from the ashes I will build a new day. I will laugh and I will cry with a clean heart, purified by the fire. God's voice seems louder on this day, as I weep. I am so sad, and am grateful. My heart is lining up with my reality.

[dominosarah]

The last real intense craving i had was while vacuuming.  I had no clue where it came from but it hit me like a ton of bricks.  Nothing is petty when it comes to this addiction.