I used to self medicate with hydro for anxiety. What now???

[ToPretty4Pills]

I am on day ten and the physical part is so much better but, the anxiety is terrible. I have suffered from horrible panic attacks since the age of 15 and I am 38 now. I have tried zoloft, paxil ect. I am on day ten CT from a very high dose of hydro for well over a decade. I have never abused benzo's and I have a prescription for valium but, I am terrified to fill it because I am afraid that since I am an addict that it is a risky thing to take. However, I don't know how much more I can take without taking a small dose. Please anyone that has had issues with this or anyone that has had a good amount of time sober I really would like your opinions on this.

[ToPretty4Pills]

@ Ben 727 thanks for the advice. I have never tried CB therapy. I have seen many psychiatrists and psychologists over the years and most of the time their answer was that I should stay on some type of anxiety medication for the rest of my life. I am really fed up with that answer from medical professionals. I have recently started to meditate. It helps a lot when I have a burst of anger but, not so much when I have a full on panic attack. I literally feel like I can't breathe. I have been in the middle of shopping for groceries and had to stop everything and leave the store. I am going to let my brain chemistry get back to normal and see if it is possible to manage the PA's without meds.  @ waterLilly thank you so much for your encouragement. I really think I will make it through this without a relapse too. I am PISSED at the painkillers that held my life hostage for so many years. I have friends and family members who are still using that have called check on me and offered suboxone or hydrocodone. and I have told them absolutely NOT!!!!!!!!!!  On day eleven and feeling pretty good. My husband told me I look so much healthier and even have my old glow back. :-)

[waterLilly7]

hey Pretty, you have a great attitude, I really feel that you are gonn amake it with no relapse, just my gutt feeling.

I don't know if this sounds silly or not, but when the anxiety got really dark for me I would imagine I was in like one of those gameshows from Asia where people have ot walk over alligator infested water and slime and stuff to get to the finish line .....  it helped. I also listened to meditation cd's, like crystal bowls, etc. that helped a bit. The best thing that helped was this forum and people telling e it would go away, because if I didn't read that here I would have thought that it would never go away.

I also had a terrible ringing in my ears that I don't hear complaints of too often, so I was scared to death that it wouldn t go away, but that did too. It all goes and we are left with our lives back, our sense of smell, our taste and our love for things, like music. When I wa son the pills I liked music, but I was racing thru life so fast I didn't really LOVE it, you know? Now, it's like OMG MUSIC!!!  LOL, all the things are there for you to enjoy once you get out here in the light with us.
It will be soon, it will.

hugs,
Lily

[Ben727]

Hey, just one thing to add to all the great comments here (as a former panic attack sufferer): There are some amazing "Cognitive Behavioral" techniques you can use to combat PAs. Breathing was mentioned already, I found only disciplined, practiced breathing ultimately helped. Just trying it during a PA is useless, you're sitting there freaking out going "the breathing isn't helping!, the breathing isn't helping!!" :) What helped the most is called "Innoculation". This is where you do something counter-initiative: When a PA comes on, instead of trying to hide from it, you welcome it and urge it to be stronger and worse. Sounds crazy, but it worked for me quickly. By welcoming the PA, your steal it's power, and reduce your fear. Pretty quick, they go from Cat 5 to small showers, at least for me. Nothing beats seeing a pro of course (look for CB specialization). Hope this helps!

[ToPretty4Pills]

Thank you all. I think I know the right thing to do now. I will try something else natural. If within 30-60 days I am still having this problem I will readdress the problem with a physician. I just don't want ANYTHING to jeopradize what I have accomplished so far. Thank you for the support. Congrats to all of you who have come so far and thank you from the bottom of my heart for coming back to help addicts like myself in our early stages of withdrawels. Would'nt be able to do it with out your help.

[selfinduced]

Hey Pretty, I never had anxiety until I detoxed, then it hit like a fricken hurricane brewing in my head, heart, limbs, tummy (you get the picture.) Try to stay away from the benzo's and if you do take them do so at the lowest dose and stop after a week. I took them and quickly got dependent. That was no fun to stop. What helped me naturally was. Hot baths, hot tea, exercise (moderate), staying busy, warm milk at night, but most of all just telling myself it won't kill me and it WILL pass. The not knowing when it would end created more anxiety. Stay positive and limit any outside stress that you can manage ok? Peace to you

[GarbageAddict360]

I, too, suffer from panic attacks.  I can tell you that my anxiety was off the charts for about 3 weeks after I stopped abusing pain meds.  I went to see a psychiatrist and told them I did not want benzos since I have abused them in the past and he put me on an antihistamine.  I didn't think that an antihistamine would help my severe anxiety, but to my surprise it did!  It is a good idea to go see a doctor and tell them what you are experiencing, as well as, the fact that you really want to stay away from controlled substances. Nursegirl6572 was very helpful to me and I am sure she won't mind talking to you too. Hope this helps :o)

[Katya5555]

I'm hearing the anxiety and depression are likely to be up for us about now (also on Day 10) I have a similar story to yours only I'm a decade older and abused Hydrocodone on and off for more than two decades. 30 pills a day/ 10 at a time. I'm actually sitting in my office reading about how to quell the anxiety. Use the techniques around deep breathing, going from your face to your feet dropping the tension. Remember the anxiety is temporary and keep remembering to breathe. You're not alone with the tightness in your chest. Let's try to get through the W/D symptoms before you start thinking about messing with benzos. Try a bath or shower too. I think the positive or negative ions make you feel better. I want to say "hang on" and "let go", even though they seem to cancel each other out. This too shall pass. For sure.
Big hug. K