Oxycontin withdrawl Help me please

[ervinski]

Unknow pain at night upper body, heart or liver area caused me to seek help after 5 years,Viox did the trick to let me sleep most the night for 3 years till it was taken off market. Finally about a year ago went and got every test possible for gal bladder, liver, upper/lower gi, heart angiograms (I've had 6 with 9 stents, and pain is like angina but my Heart Dr says I'm clear now ONLY 40% closed, but no blockages. Anyway my General Practicioner Dr put me on Oxycontin thinking it better than taking Advil, Asprin, Tylonal in large amounts. Started 20mg 2xday Nov 2008, 2mos went to 40mg 2xday, 2mos 60mg 2xday, and for the last 3 months 80mg 2xday. He doesn't want me to go higher at this point and I guess I don't either, I hadn't realized it was a large amount as I do now. I seldom abuse it (that is I just swallow it whole), except that I need more and more to be able to sleep through night, so for the last 2 mo's I've been taking the 2 80's at night, but then need to take the other 80 by afternoon or else I get sweats and more noticable pain and even throwing up, so I run out about a week prior to the 30 days. My Dr has sent me to a 'Pain' specialists now who is quesioning my need for so much (he suggeste her and I can't get an appt with her), now this is all new to me that my amount was a lot(the perscriptions were raised with a nurse practioner just over the phone each month), i'd never been questioned in asking for higher, but Dr visit last told me he wont go above the 80mg 2xday and is basically cutting me off, don't know what I can do, I've just recently found how addicted I am by trying to stop. I see so many nice people out there helping people like me, it makes me cry, that someone cares. My pain makes me cry, I'm such a whimp, and I know I like the drug because it makes me feel good and so in my heart know it is wrong, that I need to suck it up. I'm afraid to tell my wife or friends or friends at work, that I'm an adict. And the way this pain Dr says she doesn't really take people on that much oxycontin, I just didn't know. So taking up to 80mg 3x day half the time 2x over the last 8 months. I can't bear to not be able to sleep. It's worse now unless I take the 160mg at night, I hate pain, and nobody believes I really have it, they can't find anything, I guess I just want to get off it. Please, can anyone help me, suggest how I should get off it, I'm scared that I won't be able to get it from my Dr this week, and realize what an addict I am, I'll deal with the night pain as I have in the past but need to get off this stuff. Is the amt I'm taking for how long really a lot? Is it best to try and taper off to say try 60mg 2xday then 40mg then 20mg, or try this Suboxone I hear about, or try cold turkey, i'm affraid of the sweats, heart pain (wild heart beat) and of course the nightly pain but I can't stand the embarassment of being an adict. Please any help, any encouragment will be appreciated.I can handle the mental / emotional side just read King David's Psalms, I think he went through detox symptoms, I just don't want the pain and hummiliation but perhaps need to give that pride up. Pleast help me.

[ervinski]

My Dr referred me to a Pain specialist. Who is incredible. She was so understanding, and set me up to start tapering down, along with some other mild meds to help with nausia and anxiety (and possibly my pain at night). I was so scared that I was going to be left alone on this, just another loser junkie or something, hung out to dry, I would probably die, and was wondering if maybe thats what I deserve. But now, I'm sure I can do it, its been 3 days with tapered amt, though just a little, I'm sure the trick is just not doing it to get high, but to just maintain a slightly lower amount spread out evenly. I think it was taking the two 80s at once which i'd do about 12 times (days) out of every 25 (could get that xtra week under drug plan). My wife doesn't 'understand', she doesn't even take asprin. I had problems getting off xanax about 5 yrs ago which had an effect on her (me not sleeping and being so wiped out and just being an ***, and so she is very much inclined to be the one that points a finger and say you idiot. I'd rather die in withdrawls then have her know I'm having problems, for whatever reason she has absolutely no compassion on me, and after 29 years I just accept that for the most part I need that. She knows I'm on the Oxy, but not that I'm having problems getting off it. I know now for sure that I will get off this stuff, and thank God for this new Dr, and even my Dr who perscribed it, he was just trying to help and did for 8 months, just so horrible how the drug goes from making you feel good to making you need it to feel normal, it's diabolical. Thanks for all of your responses, for you kindness and love (for someone you know nothing about and yet are willing to give your time and support), may God bless you beyond your wildest imagination.

[jon709]

You remind me of myself.   After neck fusion surgery and back surgery my doc tried different pain meds to no relief.  then he said try this little blue pill.  I thought I had found the miricle cure as ALL of my back and neck pain were gone.  thank god for that.  But then eventually they had to increase the dose 20,40, then on to 80mg twice a day.  I have taken it for 5 years and for the first 3 everything was fine.  Then I noticed the pain was back.  My doctor said the same thing 80mg twice a day is the limit we can give without sending you to a pain specialist.  Well I went to see the " pain specialist"  and a young girl comes out and asks me some questions.  She was not even a DOCTOR but a nurse.  I was confused and asked how long she had worked there.  3 months was her answer.  Without even giving me a physical or anything she said I needed a pain pump implanted under my skin to deliver pain meds to my back and neck.  Not happening.  I walked out right there and told my doc what happened.  He offered another pain specialist but I said I will just stick to what I am doing.  So after 3 years on the oxy I started to do what you did and took more than I should.  sometimes I would run out a few days early sometimes a week.  This past month when I decided to stop I went through my one month supply in about 10 days.  So I figure I was taking 6 80's a day or so.  Full on addiction.  I think I have 7-8 days today and am feeling better except for my back pain.  It was so bad yesterday I just wanted to take a pill and feel better.  I didnt and made it through but had 0 hours of sleep last night.  With three kids to care for it isnt easy.  Taper your dose if you can.... believe in yourself... and let your wife help you.  You have people that love you and maybe they wont understand at first but they will.  Just have them read some stories on this board.   god bless you friend.

[Kevin_Bacon]

You have no reason to be ashamed -- your addiction was causes by doctors treating you for pain. Is there any reason you can't let your wife in on it?

There are plenty of verterans here to help you out. Maybe you could try a very slow taper; if that doesn't work, maybe suboxone. Just take it slow.

Don't be ashamed -- it's not your fault you're in pain; you don't abuse the drug, and you weren't told (by an irresponsible doctor -- but don't get on his case; you'll need the ongoing prescription in any case) how monstrously addictive oxycodone is. You might want to get a second opinion re the pain, but don't risk cutting off your supply, as you need it for the taper or until you decide to switch. And the pain -- you can't live like that, so if the oxy's help, stick with them until you have a medical plan. Medically-assisted detox is a possibily (they'll help you with the w/ds and the pain), but do you have to keep it so hush-hush?

You have no reason to be ashamed -- you trusted your doctor, and oxy is the Number One painkiller out there.

Keep in touch.

[Mangee]

Going cold turkey requires a lot of willpower and inner strength. I walked away from it and fought the withdrawal demons for almost two months. Even with drugs that help with withdrawal, it is not an easy road. You have to want it, really want it so bad that you can feel it in your very soul. Then you have to be sure it is what you want and then plan how you are going to start. You will get opinions from others, you will get support from others, and you will get help from the professionals but ultimately you are the one who has to walk the walk. You may fall or stagger on the trip you are making and you have to right yourself and continue on no matter what. If, in your heart you want to get back to the life you used to have, you have to put every bit of your being into the effort. No one can do it for you. Doctors or other professionals can offer what they feel may help but as I said before, ultimately, you are the one who is sailing through the deep waters of withdrawal and it depends on what kind a of a captain you are whether or not you bring the ship safely home. Have faith in yourself and your resolve. If you keep that faith burning you will make it. Know that I will be walking alongside you but that is all I or anyone else can do. I won't say,'Good luck,' because when it comes to ,luck has nothing to do with it. It's what you do that controls the final outcome.

[ervinski]

Thank you for your encouragment. I havn't shopped Dr's or chewed or snorted, or got it off the street or with other than the one Dr I have. I just took as perscribed except I'd keep creeping up. I found I could get the next perscription filled after about 3 weeks so I would use the amt. I got the orig perscription for 20mgx2day from the Dr. then for the next 8 months just got it renewed on the phone with the nurse practitioner (and assummed the Dr's OK 2 mo's of 20mg 2xday, then 3 mo's 40mg 2xday, then 2 mo's 60mg 2xday, then 3 mo's now ad 80mg 2xday), but to have the same effect (let me sleep all night I had to eventually take both doses at night, but then found I often started feeling fluish and sweats by afternoon and so would take one more, so I was abusing it that way, and it wasn't till I asked for more than the 2 80mg/day that I saw the Dr, and he said this was a very high amt (and that I shouldn't continue), and that I didn't want to be like Rush Limbough, so he set me up to see a pain Dr specialist, but she didn't want to help me because she needed a better prognosis (and a 2mo waiting list) and cause for taking that much ('that much' was a surprise to me because it was increased every 3 months so easily with just call on phone and pick up perscription). I tried quiting at this point (just a few weeks ago) and got really sick and hot flashes, and muscle and back aches, just after less than 24 hours along with heart palpatations (which scares me because I have 9 stents after 4 angiograms over the last 2 years) My Dr is a very good Dr, I have been able to sleep for the last 8 mo's and I hate that I'll have to start not being able to sleep again, but I accept that the drug just doesn't work unless you take more and more, and now I'm taking too much, I'm willing to get off it, just scared at the pain I'm sure it will involve. Had a visit w/him today and he got me an appointment with the pain specialist for this Fri. I'm just wondering if she is going to say I have to commit myself or something or pay thousands. None of my friends know I am on this, not even my wife (she knows - but not about the problem of my being adicted so much with the pain trying to get off) I think I am an addict becuase I am now dependent on the drug, and I do like the euphoria it gives - but I haven't abused it other than taking the 30 day amount in 24 days. I guess I won't know if the 8mo reprieve of pain at night was worth it till I finish getting off of it. I've had so many tests to find out what my night pain is, to no avail GI, Heart, Gal Bladder, Digestive process, Angina, artheritis, liver problems. I'm a diabetic (53 years old) and think it has something to do with it. Can't keep my sugar below 300, 50lbs overweight. My only hope is that maybe if I can lose the weight the problem will lessen. I was addicted to xanax 4mg/day for heart (keeping calm) that I got off of 5 years ago and my wife (of 29 years) has beat me over the head with that so many times, I'm afraid of letting her know about this problem. It's been unperseptable at home and work, it would seem to be impossible to hide it once I'm in withdrawl (as was the xanax problem). Please pray for me I ask God to help me, where I'm at right now is my fault even though I might not be an Addict I am Dependent, and that is a shamefull thing, , even my fear is shamefull, God will help me though as always I don't deserve His love and mercy, I am His child and sorry that I'm such a bad example being His child. I just hate pain, I hate waking up 5 times a night with an unrestfull sleep, and I've turned to drugs (an empty cistern). We'll see what happens with the Fri appointment. Again, I'd like to say it's not my Dr's fault, in this world you will have tribulation, my pain thing is mine, God help me deal with it and learn, and trust in Him, and experience His help. I have also been on Ambien CR these 8 months, but am not so worrid (yet) about that, it also helps me sleep. But I hate that I need drugs to be able to sleep or not be in pain, I have been brought under thier power and am not totally free. And the 'feeling good' this with Oxy is not right, it's not natural, when if I don't have them I won't sleep, and I disire sleep so much without pain way too much, our lives on earth are so temporary, and the weeds and cares of this life are strangling me to death. Please pray for me. I'll try and not whine so much from now on. Just wanted to explain my situation a little better.Maybe I'm supposed to not sleep, but get up and walk around and pray at night, and maybe fast to lose this extra weight. God help me.Thanks again, all of you for your undeserved concern for me. I can't tell you how helpfull it is, that a total stranger would care about some idiot cry baby. Wow blah blah blah, sorry, thankyou for your comments, anyone have question I can ask this Pain Dr? It's nice to air out my fears helping me to put them aside. God bless you all, good night.

[road2recovery]

Welcome....this is something that makes me angry.. now this is just my opinon, but i am not sure i would say you are an addict...Dependent , YES...Have you ever Dr shopped?  Or buy some off the streets??
I was an addict...and did those things...I am not proud of it at all..But like you said we must let our pride go...These drugs are the devil, and get a hold of us , we are not bad people..
So your doctor cut you off why??  when they raised your dose over the phone??  I am confused, and maybe didn't understand it all..
anyway, we are here to help you...Yes you can do this..My Doc was lortab, so I will leave your post to the ones that their DOC was OC...But just wanted to show my support to you
god bless
r2r

[candothis247]

Yep, that is a very high dose… and they really increased it quickly it seems, every 2 months, they doubled your dose.  I would start trying to reduce your dose, and taper down to a lower dose before you do anything else (if you can taper) I found that when I was on those higher doses of oxycontin, it wasn’t even helping my neck pain, and in fact, it was causing more pain… Once I started tapering, I started feeling better, however, it took me a long time to finally get down to 40 mg per day and I stayed on that for several months, then I tapered more, I did it very slowly…. maybe too slow, but I have a date now that I’m going to quit. I came here to learn about options for getting off the pills. I read about suboxone and decided not to use that method.  If you absolutely cant taper, maybe you want to try a suboxone, but I would read read read about it b-4 going that route.  You will find lots of good info. here., Knowledge is power. Also, it looks like you’ve been on the opiates for less than a year, so it think it would be feasible for you to start a taper and be able to get off them, if you really want to, only because I’ve heard the longer you’ve been on them the harder it is to get off of them.
Regarding your sleep, I have always had difficulty sleeping on oxycontin, I think inability to sleep t is a common side effect of oc use. I used 50 mg  trazodone to sleep and it worked well, lots of people hate tazodone because of the groggy feeling you get the next morning, I found that a couple cups of coffee in the morning and the groggy goes away…. And, by a long shot, getting a good night’s sleep was worth the groggy mornings to me. Good luck in your journey.

[scaredmom330]

welcome, you have come to the right place. There are lots of wonderful people here to help and support you. you are taking a very high dose, it would be best to get your doctor to help with the detox and gradually decrease your dose each week if possible. It is very hard to taper by yourself and most can't do it. If you had someone else hold and dispense your meds when needed would be better. it is doable but will be hard. check out the thomas recipe and amino acid protocol. get plenty of juice or vitamin water, food and exercise. you will feel like you have a bad case of the flu for about a week. post and keep posting and read as many threads as possible. stay with us. tale it one day at a time and be strong. p,m me anytime you need to talk.