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Please Help does vicodin addiction change your personality

My husband denies having an addiction to vicodin although I have found many prescriptions. He has had several epidurals also a state of the art procedure where they laser the bone in your back. There is no doubt that he may have back pain but I know he abuses the vicodin because of his rapid speech and change in behavior. My husband has gone from being the kindest man to being someone I don't even know at times. He is very secretive, paranoid, and we argue all the time over stupid things. He likes to blame me for his behavior, is this normal behavior for someone who is addicted to vicodin, we are on the verge of a divorce because it not only has affected me but also my 11 yr. old daughter.
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Avatar universal
how can i contact you? Right now i am dealing with my girlfriend going through the same stuff. She lives with me, and i take care of her 2 children. She is without a doubt addicted to Vicodin. she takes about 9-12 thousands a day. She is mean to me, mean to her kids, and she doesn't even realize it. Shes not the same person she used to be. She doesn't realize she has a problem, she just blames it on her pain. I understand that she has had her back broke, and she is in pain, but i do not believe for a second shes in 12 vicodin a day pain. I just want the girl back that i fell in love with, and i dont want our relationship to suffer because of it anymore. she doesnt want to hear it though, i think that if she talked to someone like you, someone that sounds exactly like her maybe she will understand. Thank you. my email is ***@****, please write me.
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438868 tn?1207700684
And I would like to add- best of luck. Keep reading and posting if it helps.
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438868 tn?1207700684
Hiya-  was a vic user for many years. It was like a slow descent into hell for me. Normally I guess before the vics I was described as a bright, shiny, happy, hyper as hell and funny person. Full of life, energy and FUN! Slowly I began to change. I smiled less, was grumpy, slept more, had less interest in ANY of the activities that I previously enjoyed. I soon forgot to pay bills or I paid them late and was late to work. I became depressed much of the time. I sat on my butt and ate more. Therefore between that and aging- I began to gain weight. My hubby said that it was like living with a "shell" of a person. I was only a shell of my former self.

When he said this it broke my heart. Do you know why it broke my heart? Because he was right. The changes in me were gradual. But they also were very noticable. I used to watch "intervention" and I would tell myself that I was not as "bad" as "those people".

After all- I am a chronic pain patient. "Those" people were just addicts... ********. I am an addict and I am finally woman enough to admit it. I was abusing my meds. I was hiding from the pain that I caused myself and my hubby. I lacked the coping skills to deal with that pain at the time. Both emotional and physical.

Here I am sober now for three months. I can see all of that clear as day. back them- it was not quite so clear. Between being in the situation and being on drugs made it more difficult to see and to admit.

It does change your personality. Don't ever think that it is you. It is not you. It is him on drugs. Sorry for the rant- just trying to get a very important point across. :)
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Avatar universal
Yes, it changes your personality big time... I did not or would not see the change that came over me, but other people did.. At first I had all this enery and would get all kinds of things done but then I was getting that burst of energy anymore so I just sat around and things went to pot around me..
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Avatar universal
long term abuse to vicodin can be very harmful to ur liver if not deadly even if u take them correctly ...the tylenol if the vicodins is very toxic to ur liver,,,if hes taking more than 4000mgs of tylenol in 24hrs over the yrs he can be doing serious harm to his liver..& if hes abusing them u should confront him with that approach ...my wife & kids & the thought of liver damage made up my mind to quit after 3 1/2 yrs..im on day 13 and all withdrawals are gone & im starting to feel normal again,,,& its the 1st time in all those yrs ive laughed or even smiled without being on pills..but to quit u have to want to quit, u cant be forced.. i was in vicodins & oxy contins everyday..i took low doses of methadone for the 1st 5days of quiting just to get thru the worst day & fought it out to now & i feel great.
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Avatar universal
u kno withdrawals  from the suboxen are similar to vicodin and can last alot longer,,,but u could taper off of them
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Avatar universal
it changes ur attitude 100% when u dont have vicodins when ur addicted...im on day 13 of quitting a 3 1/2yr addiction..i had a legit injury to take them but i abused them.after a few months of taking them everyday ur body becomes addicted if ur taking them legitimately or for fun...but paranoia & fast speech doesnt seem like its from vicodins ...when i took them being paranoiad never happened ..fast speech & paranoia is a side effect of speed or cocaine ,,but if ur in withdrawals from the vicodins u can be very aggressive and have alot of anxiety,,from friends ive seen who took vicodins over the yrs started to get mad when they couldn't get the high they use to get when they first started due to the tolerance they built up over the yrs
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Avatar universal
I know when I did the vicodin I would talk alot.I wasn't paranoid,but I learned how to be real secretive.It's weird,it always gave me all that energy so I thought I was this bubbly person when I was on them,and now my family tells the stories of how different I was,but not in a good way.Then there were all the times I would be so irritatable,because it was approaching the 4 hour mark and I didn't have 4 more in my immediate pocession to swallow down so I would start to panic,call everybody and their brother looking for something so you don't get sick.Inpatiently waiting for the phone to ring back,and then making-up an excuse to run out,and why noone can go with you. It changed my personality alot. Goodluck to your family. And please remember if your husband does have a problem,and it is affecting you and your childs well being,and he choses not to make a change.You owe it to your child and yourself to make a change of your own . None of us quit until we're ready to quit. Peace.
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Avatar universal
It totally changes your personality. Its rather subtle when it starts and continues changing and the person does not even realize it. If he is denying that his behavior is changing, then he will have to admit that it is linked to the vicoden and thats the last thing an addict wants to admit; something bad being linked to his DOC. If you break the behavior down: When I was addicted, I was extremely secretive about things because usually I was hding things that wuld be linked to my addiction such as checkbook balancces, savings balances, Credit card and Bank Statements. I also didnot like my wife going through my work bag because that is where I kept my drugs. When I was carrying pills stuck in my front pockets, then had to change, I always changed when she was not around or I wuld go in the bathroom and change because I did not want her to see me take the pills out of the pocket and transfer them into my new pants. I was paranoid whent he phone rang because I did not know if it might be my connection so I would grab the cell phone and go rush into another room so she couldnot hear me on the phone...etc... alot of things. Does any of this sound familiar? If it does, print this off for him to see. Also my wife and I argued about the stupidest stuff too. Usually always resulting from me being difficult. When I was using, I could think extremely clear, I had a tremendous memory and I could argue the pants off of anything with anyone and win. I was invincible because I could think so, so clearly. That in itself made me want to challenge things because I knew I would win. When we would fight, my wife said I had a look in my eye that was scary to her. Myh children noticed a huge difference in me and actually told their Mom a few times that they thought I was mean, difficult and just plain not nice anymore...that hurt really bad for me. Anyway, I am 10 weeks into my treatment. I take Suboxone which prevents the withdrawal effects when you stop taking vicodin. Its like a miracle drug, I kid you not because I quit taking it and the Suboxone made me feel like I had the drugs in me, but it did not make me high. I do not experience withdrawal in any way and I do not take my drugs anymore. Just a few days into the Suboxone, my wife told me that I had changed considerable. She noticed it within a few days; and I have to admit I noticed it too. I was so much calmer, absolutely no desire to argue whatsoever and I felt so, so, so much better -and again, I was taking Suboxone and not the vicodin.
Sheilaa, I can relate so much to what you wrote that had I not seen the name, I would have thought it was written by my wife.
I will suggest something here, and this is the tricky part. For me, I could not stop taking the vicodin, I wanted too, but could not stop by myself. I knew I had to keep taking them so that I did not go into withdrawal. I also believed I could not tell my wife or anyone about it because then they would make me stop right then and there and I knew, I knew there was no way I could just stop taking it because hte withdrawal would have been too difficult to deal with. NOW, had my wife came to me, and in a very compassionate way say to me that she knows I was am addicted, and told me that she was not mad at me, and said to me that she knew I did not set out to have this happen to me, that she has to beleive that its hell being addicted, and that she will support me when I choose to stop taking them..........I probably would have cried like a baby and told her eveything. The key is to remember this...not a single person sets out to become addicted to their painpills. It just happens and it can happen anyone. For anyone, wife, children, brother, stister, etc.. to be upset at me for being addicted is just plain ridiculous. I did not set out to have it happen, it just happened. I live with pain and I had to control it so I could enjoy a half way decent life and in the process, the pills took hold of me without my realizing it. Anyway, I bet if you share with him your love and compassion for what he must be going through rightnow, he will much, much sooner than later come to you and start talking about it. He will know that you are not mad, you will not try to take his pills away, and that he can share with you what is going on. I know I would have had my wife came to me the way I described.
Please understand though, I am not in anyway upset with my wife for not coming to me. She had no idea how to handle what was going on. She had no idea what so ever and she had no one to give her advice on how to handle it so its not like she knew if she came to me it would have helkped. We got through it the hard way, but we got through it and are still mending our fractured relationship as a result of my addiction. But she is there for me, she loves me and she cares about our future and that in itself is all I can ask and its plenty enough to make me believe we will be ok.
I encourage you Sheilaa, think about what your options are. He needs you right now but he cannot tell you that, but he does. and he will admit it once he feels like it is safe to share his addiction with you.
Best of Luck Sheilaa, I will be praying for both of you.
God Bless
MikeWithFamily
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Avatar universal
From the inside looking out I didn't see it, but my wife made a comment a few times about be not being as nice when taking them as was before I started. It really didn't affect our relationship that I know of, but I kept my useage within the amount prescribed.
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199177 tn?1490498534
See when i hear rapid speech, paranoia, being secretive ,It sends off red flags of me for the possibility of other drugs as well.does he have any drug history?
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437415 tn?1211829556
If he has been taking vicodin for a prolonged period I'm sure he is physically dependent.  Besides finding prescriptions is there any hard core evidence he is abusing the drug?  Using proof to back up you inclinations makes confronting him so much easier.  I'm sorry you're going through this, I truly hope you and your family can get this straightened out.

Lisa
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340590 tn?1290952141
yes, it is completely normal behavior for anyone on opiates.  if  he denies it there is not much you can do.  keep reading the post and you will get familiar with addiction
good luck
cathy
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