Shame and Denial....

[GA Guy]

Are shame and denial keeping you from aftercare? I ask because I just read an interesting research study on shame and addiction. To make it easy, addicts are self centered people by nature. When a normal person gets into trouble...they ASK FOR HELP. Addicts simply say I CAN DO THIS BY MYSELF. It's seems like a never-ending cycle. Two of the strongest emotions addicts feel when they're in active addiction are shame and denial. They're ashamed of their disease and in denial about it. They seem like contradicting emotions...how can we be shameful of things we deny are happening? The result is isolation as the addict reaches their bottom. I see so many people here reject the suggestion of aftercare. They think that they have it whipped this time. I am here to tell you that denial of the importance of aftercare will ultimately lead to relapse. Having shame about having a disease is irrational at best, and it shows just how powerful this disease it. I can promise you, the memory of withdrawal doesn't stand a chance against the memory of the high. The disease is just too strong. Don't let shame or denial about how life threatening this disease is deter you from seeing aftercare. There is no shame in wanting to get better.

[dominosarah]

Bottom line here is if you really want to stay clean you will do whatever you have to do to stay a healthy clean.  For me recovery care has saved my life.  I have been an addict since my real early teens.  I used for 30 plus years......lots of emotional baggage was carried all those years.  Today i am over 2 yrs clean.  I no longer just go thru the motions, i actually live now.......sara

[avisg]

pepper what are you doing to stay off drugs ?

[pepper1107]

I really do not want to see the stats on it, I was responding to the fact that someone said they existed.  Please read my post to get what I really said.  Also, I am not seeing a MD doctor ongoing for addiction.  Again,  in my post I said he helped me map out a plan to taper and begin the recovery process.  Key word is BEGIN,  He in no way claimed to be an addiction specialist.  In fact, he sent me to an Addiction Specialist,  I also refereed to me speaking with him in my post.   Both Gnarly and GA GUY are really specific about what aftercare is, that is why I excluded myself.  In their posts they say aftercare is NA, AA, Counselor, Support Group or Church Pastor.  That is where I got the definition of aftercare as far as the Board is concerned .  I am a work in progress and have nothing against aftercare as it is defined.

[Htownnofrown]

Well if it isn't a life-long disease and it's not spiritual than it has to be moral. Doing something that is bad for you regardless of the consequences to yourself and others around you is reckless at best. For me, it is a disease and a symptom of a spiritual malady. It makes me no difference how people see their addiction. I've used the 12 steps and have been sober more than a year now. So it obviously works if you work it.

Here's the point. People who engage in 12 step programs and addiction counseling, on average, stay sober longer than those who don't. If your a person who doesn't do those things, it doesn't mean you are inevitably going to relapse, it just means statistically, you are in the higher risk category. You want to see numbers on that, look it up for yourself, its out there. I've said it before, it makes me no difference what other addicts do, it just seams logical to me to use AA since it has been around over 70 years, and has proven through millions of recoveries, that it works.

[avisg]

Nobody has said people are not interested in recovery because they don't go to na or a therpist .As i said the first time I stopped using  I didn't get any care . I was just as interested in staying clean .I just did not have enough tools to keep myself clean all on my own .I needed help  and I got it .

[laurel453]

i'm not talking either of any moral flaw in our personalities, it sounds rather childish this explanation to me.

it could only be a case of emotional intelligent and having to develop some skills about it, for instance, in some cases.