Having a weak moment and need a little reassurance

[TimmyVD]

After battling a six year addiction I stopped taking Xanax for about four months now. It's a big problem for me. Unlike most people I have abused in a very bad way I would black out, get violent...everything. Finally after going to therapy and really working at it I stopped. It was soooo hard. I am dealing with triggers in a good way (by just avoiding them period) and I have been alright. Until today. An old friend called me and asked me if I knew anyone that needed some. I told her no, and she kept pressing. I kept telling her no. I managed to get off the phone. Now I here thinking about it....maybe just five or ten, it won't hurt. But I know what that can potentially lead to.

I just need a little reassurance to get me this rough patch.  

[MsQuickFix]

You should talk to my husband about that one, hes at work right now but i will give him your username. hes trying to quit benzos thats why we came to this website.  I dont understand it either.  Something so stupid or small and meaningless will happen and he'll destroy everything in his path.  Furniture, tv, phone, stereos...stuff that is his or mine that he knows he'll have to replace but he does it anyway.  I'm on my 3rd windshieild in my car...

[TimmyVD]

eek! That was me alright acting like a complete and utter lunatic! I can't even count how many times I have trashed the house. Throwing around TV's for God's sake.

In my rational mind I know the consequences....but when that little voice speaks it warps that thinking...does anyone know what I mean? Sometimes I feel crazy when this happens. It's like you know better so why even lust after it? I just don't get it.

[MsQuickFix]

he can get. And hes gotten violent around our son even. Destroyed our whole house punched holes in the walls, beat me up, got the cops called more than a few times! Do you want to go back to all that? It isnt worth it, trust me I know.  Good luck to you, and if you know any encouraging words for my husband his user name is burningup or you can message me back for anything else you need. Stay strong!

[GoingToMakeIt]

5 or 10? = 1000 !!!

Eat some really dark chocolate, at least 70% cocoa. It will help.

[MsQuickFix]

You've been so strong for this long you don't need them.  Think about what happened when you got violent and blacked out? Remember what you felt like going throgh w/d you dont wanna experience that again! Avoiding triggers is really important. I am the wife of a current benzo addict. Were talking upto 120 mg of valium 10 mg xanax or 8 mg klonopins daily, whichever benzo h