Starting my tapering

[needinghelp184]

Hi everyone right now i am struggling with my Taper and feel hopeless,  I really have no support to do this at home. I feel really alone and hurt.. I knew i had a problem with pain meds 2 years ago when i went from doing 10 mg norcos 8 a day to 12 a day, then i was sent to a pain mangement dr he added 6 30 mg oxy a day, plus 6 10 10 mg norcos and 2 mg of xanax a day.. i have been doing up to 11 30 mg oxys , 6-8 norco 10 mg and 2-3 mg of xanax at night.. On top of it all im scared i have never been so scared before in my life, .. at the moment im trying to push my next dose with a gf that wants to leave me.. we have 2 kids together been together 20 yrs, she got hooked on norcos 2 years ago for back problems.. i just need some hope ... and advice on how to do this... Im aam so very tired of being a slave to these opiates and am not proud of the person i have become. My family has been torn to shreds .. i tryed asking my gf this morning what she wants to do.. she just totally snapped and said some pretty hurtful things.. i asked her if we could just forgive each other and move on and get though this, she said she will never trust me again, cause im sending my kids to my moms for x mas to get them out of this mess that are stuck in..any help on tapering would really be apreciated

[IBKleen]

Hi Needinghelp. I am glad you found your way to this community. There are many wonderful and supportive members here who will guide you through this process and into recovery.

I have to give you credit. I was never one for tapering. I thought it was torture to go through withdrawal slowly. I was a rip the band-aid off kinda gal. I am sure you will soon get to that point where you realize that you will have to feel the withdrawal no matter what. You are doing a fast taper so it will hit you. For now just try and stay on track in what you are doing. It is worth it.

As far as your girlfriend--She is angry. She is probably most angry that you are getting clean. It is something she may secretly want but does not know how to get it right yet. So she gets angry and probably jealous as well. You can't help her. You need to concentrate on YOU and you only. I have seen it time and time again with two people are trying to get clean and they both fall. It is easier for you to use right now and give in then it is for her to get clean. So be very, very careful around her. Try not to take her words to heart. Stay on course and you will do this. For YOU.

Keep coming back and talking here. I wish you the very best.  

Have you considered any form of aftercare once you stop altogether? If so, please ask the members here how they stay clean. We are all happy to share our experience, strength and hope with you.

[rubber_duck_bisket_in_the_poolwhynow265]

You inspire me. Don't give up and keep with your taper plan. The WD will be much easier is you jump from 10mg rather 50...100...120...500mg a day (I know!). We are all cheering for you!   AND, many more are watching/reading without committing that envy you and your will power (WOW).

[Pat1956100]

You both are doing great and your support for each other is huge.
We really need that.  Vent away, cry, laugh, talk, but GET CLEAN.
You are doing it.

[notordinary]

Brother let the music blast loud.  You will see.  Blast it.  
Thank bro.

[needinghelp184]

you will!!  you are very strong and are in the battle of your life.. you are kicking arse and taking names later.. things will get better everyday... you have decided and done it..  i am so happy for you ... each day gets brighter...

[notordinary]

Thanks  means a lot to me.
It has been a rough road this last decade.
But now i got this. No problems. I'm done  
I want to feel the sun on my face.  I want to laugh again.
I want to feel happiness. Pain, and all this new life has for me to climb over and come out the other side. Undefeated!!!!!