Day 5 - Quitting Hydrocodone

[C8H10N4O2]

I made it this far...  It hasn't been the most fun journey so far, but I'm making progress day by day.

Overall today, I'm feeling pretty good.  The worst part today is that runs are back.  I thought I had left those behind a couple of days ago.  I still get pretty tired, but I'm forcing myself to move.  Its helped in the last few days, so it can't hurt now.

The weirdest thing at this point was the crazy dream last night.  I don't really ever remember my dreams, but they were intense last night.  And epic.  Like I'd wake up and go back to sleep and it would pick up from where I stopped.  The basic theme of the dream was it was a review of the last 20 years.  It was like walking down a road and having to choose left or right at the fork.  For some reason, I never chose the path that I actually took in real life.  I wish I could see the end of it now.  I woke up very nostalgic and actually feel some of the heartache, heartbreak and frustration that I felt over the last 20 years.  It was very strange.

I haven't read much about people having dreams other than dreaming about the pills as they came off.   Anyone had anything like what I experienced.  I'm not sure I can do another night like that.  It was exhausting.

I gotta get my head on straight and get some work done...  Stop thinking about the past and the different paths.

Talk to you soon.

Matt

[C8H10N4O2]

I put the weird dreams behind me and put my head into work.

And then as a reward / punishment, I decided that today I was going to start running again.  It wasn't the best of runs...  1.5 miles in 22 minutes.  But I did it...  I kept hearing R Lee Army in my head yelling at me...  "Run you miserable puke!"

I'm sure that I'll pay for it later, but damn I feel good right now.

Matt

[road2recovery]

I had the weird dreams, but like you said mine were usually drug dreams, sometimes to the point that i woke up and really thought i relapsed...

Do exactly what you said, and stay out of your head, by staying as busy as you can...put on some of your favorite music, that helps so much!!
keep going and stay strong
r2r