can't get a grip on meth & alcohol addictions

[lioncat]

I find myself dying inside as I continue to use and it is my secret. To the outside I seem o.k. They know I have
had a problem in the past but most think it is under control. Yet, I am totally out of control and scared to death.\
How do I get a grip? I pray. I have gone to meetings but stopped. Can't seem to get it together to go again. Any advice?
Thanks, Meow

[cathy5841]

good morning.  so glad you are reaching out for help...please get back to the meetings, they will help you feel in control...it is a start.  are you using methadone or crystal meth?  you can do this, there is support for you here.

[snowflake620]

let go and let god it sounds so easy but it is so hard to do i am glad you are going to talk to someone it will help and you can beat this thing i will be praying for you linocat,god bless,
                                snowflake

[lioncat]

I have been drinking one bottle of wine a day and using meth every couple of days for 2 1/2 years. Actually it has excelled to that amount over the course of 2 1/2 years. I erased the numbers of my dealers today and I have an appointment with an author of a book (about her struggle and victory over drugs) today. With her I will be able to try and talk. There is no friend or family member I can talk to. Believe it or not, nobody knows how severe it is. With the meth... Nobody knows. With the alcohol people know I have a problem but don't realize how much I drink. I am leading a secret life and it is killing me. I feel a spiritual need to grow and let go. Now is the time to stop once and for all. Thank you for responding to my comment.

[snowflake620]

don't give up lioncat you are reaching out for help and that is the first step if you are serious about getting clean you came to the right place, alot of people here to help you are you still using? if so what?how long is there a family member you can talk to or a close friend? if not keep coming here and ask any question you want people here do not judge you we have all been where you are hang in there