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Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
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Avatar universal

addicted to pills!

OK,  I need advice from someone.  My boyfriend and I are both addicted to percs/OCs/Dilodid(however its spelled) and it ruining our lives.  We have to stop and we cant.  I dont know what to do.  We both hate being addicted to this stuff.  I feel like a junky, he feels like a junky, but we cant stop.  I hate it.  Whenever we try to stop we feel like ****.  My legs ache, I get real sweaty, but Im freezing cold, I cant get comfortable, I cant sleep, I cant breath, I get irritable, and I cant function like a normal person.  I just want to be normal again, I want my life back.  I have a son, and I cant be a good mom when Im addicted to pills, and my boyfriend cant be a good dad either.  We're broke because we spend all our money on pills.  Both of us really really really want to stop this.  Someone please help me.  If anyone knows any way to get off of this stuff without feeling like Im going to die, please help me.  This is ruining my life.  I want to be a happy family agian, and we both try so hard.  If we dont stop we're gonna lose our house, our son, and everything else.  My family is the most important thing to me.  I feel like I should be able to just stop for my family, but I cant, and its making me feel like a horrible person, and I dont want to feel like this any more.  Please help me.
66 Responses
Avatar universal
You are not alone! Welcome to the forum. I am not going to really give advice since this is all new to me but you have come to the right place. There are so many great people on here. What I do know is that you are not alone, and there are a few different ways to stop. You obviously do not like the cold turkey because of withdrawals, are you able to taper down on your amount each day?
Avatar universal
the feelings that you are describing are withdrawals they will go away if u can make it through them.it will take anywhere between 5-10 days to really know your getting better. if you realllly cant do it and you give up every time you can call a clinic in your area and get a drug called suboxone. it will cost you about $200 for a script. it counteracts the withdrawal symptoms so you can withdraw more comfortably, please do this for your son if not for yourself
Avatar universal
You need to sit here and read all these posts for a couple of hours at least.  every question you have will be answered and look up the thomas recipe in the meantime to get prepared.  if it the two of you can you taper or must it be cold turkey.

You are right you will lose it all if you don't stop.

how long have you guys been addicted.
Avatar universal
Welcome,you have found a great place for advice and support,if you read the posts you will find alot of people with the same problem that are all trying to get off the pills.You sound like you really are ready that is the biggest step.Withdrawl is different for everyone and there are vitimans,suppliments,lots of advil AM &pm ,heating pad lots of hot baths and if you can clear your schedules for 5-7 days it is doable.You will find it is like the flu as you have experienced but with posting and supplies you can do it.I am 31 days off vics today and it is so much better.I was so afraid to do this and had failed before but with the help and the great support and advice of the people on this site it was so much easier this time.I do not think about or want a pill anymore.You can do this too.So please pick a date to start your life you can do this.It is kind of quiet tonight but more will respond.Good Luck
Avatar universal
how much do you spend on average per week? How many do you have as of this moment? Does anyone else know about your problem? family, friends?  how old is your child? How are you paying for rent, etc if your spending it all on percs/dillauded/oc's?   Can you give me an exact amount of each of the 3 opiates you take each day?  and how often? I would love to help you. You will not be able to detox together...your going to have to take turns...it's the only way to do it unless you can afford not to work as a couple and have someone else raise your child for a few weeks.....hope to hear from you soon.
Avatar universal
sickcookie is right. U can do it. It took 5 days of hell. For me. From excactly what u r taken. Hot baths, 4-5 a day. I did go to my family doc and he was very cool about it. He gave me ten day script of Valium at night n Xanax during day. Just get it for ten days. Work out daily. U may not be able to for a week. U 2 need to do this. I've been clean now for 34 days n feel like a human. Because u too r switching pills and probably doses. U may already have had w/d. N didnt even now. R u both sick like the flu alot? The body pains will stop. Go to gnc get supplements. To help u thru this. I will never go back. If ur supplier is a friend tell him not to sell them to u anymore. Mine was and honored my request.  Don't waste ur lives. U only get one shot at it.
Avatar universal
I wanted to answer your questions.  Between my boyfriend and I we probably spend an average of 500 dollars a week on this stuff, we'd spend a lot more but, unfortunently, we know all the right people.  Right now we have 4 Dilaudeds left for the night.  No one knows about this.  My friends wouldnt understand this, my mom was a recovering alcoholic/drug addict, she was the only family mamber I would be able to talk to about this, but she died last may.  That was when all of this started getting out of hand.  I had taken pills from time to time before that, and I hate to admit this, but when she died she had several bottles of OCs and Dilaudeds, and I took them.  At the time I was working at a strip club, the drugs were so easy to access there, and I couldnt get on stage or do anyother aspects of my job sober anyway, so I took so many pills.  Since then its been out of hand.  I probably take on average, 4-7 15 mg Rockocets, 3-4 OC80s, and 7-10 dilaudeds everyday.  I cant go to my family for support, my dad has always been extremely emotionally abusive towards me, and I know it would do more harm then good to tell him.  Besides, I know he'll take my son.  I cant loose my son, I have to stop, I know my son deserves better than this, and I know I can give him the best, I just need to fix this.  I'm not a stripper anymore, I thought when I quit that it would be easy to quit the drugs, but its not.  My son will be 2 in July.  He is my life, I cant loose him, but I also cant allow him to be raised by a drug addict.  Im really scared, please, any help and advice you could give me would be appreciated.  I dont want to do these drugs anymore, but the thought of going through the withdrawl scares the hell out of me.  Im so scared I wont be able to do this.  I need help.  Im so mad at myself for what I'm doing to myself and my son.  The only reason we even have a place to live is because before I got into this mess, I made a good amount of money, and paid a years rent ahead of time.   Please dont think Im a bad mom, and please dont judge me because I was a stripper, or because Im addicted to pills.  You seem understanding, Im just so ashamed of the person I've become, that Im scared of what other people will think now that you guys know about what really goes on in my life. Please write me back.  Thank you for your support.
-Monkey-
Avatar universal
I didnt think everyone was going to be able to read what I wrote to spacecadette....Now I feel really stupid.  Please dont anybody think Im a bad person for the things I wrote.  I didnt know you would all be able to see it.  I thought it was going to an E-mail or something.  I wish I could delete it, but I dont think I can.  Maybe its best because now everyone knows my story, and maybe you all can help me better now.  Thanks guys for all your support so far.  I wrote the first massage an hour ago and already have gotten a lot of supportive messages from ya'll.  I was very suprised, and am very thankfull.  Again, please dont think Im a bad person for the things I said in that last message.
Avatar universal
no one is here to judge you we all have some serious problems and thats why we are here to try to help each other!
412194 tn?1233625132
there is no shame here, we all have our crosses to bare. HANG in there you can do this for your son if nothing else, I'd like to see you do it for you then your sone will reap the profits.  It isnt easy but gets easier as time goes by about a week and w/d gets better.  Keep posting.
swtbreezie
Avatar universal
You guys are all so wonderful.  Thanks for your understanding and suport.....I hope I can get better and be able to help people on here the way you are all reaching out to help me.
412194 tn?1233625132
Hold your head high there is no shame you are doing great!  Keep reading and posting it helps tremendously.
swtbreezie
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