coping with an addict advice

[scaredandconfused1116]

Hi everyone,
My live in boyfriend is on day 4 of being clean from Oxycontin.  I believe he is doing well and have tried to be as supportive as possible in his recovery.  We have a 3 yr old son who is our world and I dont think he has noticed thank goodness.  At any rate I was looking for input from families and addicts as to what may have helped them get through a time like this.  Anything your family did to try to support you that you may not have been able to get sober without?  anything you did for a family member to help them get through this?  I do realize that he has to be ready and willing on his own and no one can pick this time for him and I do believe that he is ready but am looking for anone who could reach out for support.  He was only taking the pills for a month and a half and the wd which were horriblw the first night have calmed down quite a bit in the passed few days but I dont htink that that totally makes a difference I think once you are addicted you are addicted whether its been years or a week.  As well as that it has only been a week but he has been an alcoholic and a coke addict for a few years now.  He uit that a few months ago and seemed to be doing well. Any input is greatly appreciated

[notgoingdown]

I too am going thru this with my husband. He wasnt on oxycontin so we are lucky in that he hasnt gone past vicodin. He tells me he is trying to quit them now but I still worry if he is being honest with me or even himself. What Sway said is very true, believe half of what you see & none of what he says. Dont push it in his face that you cant trust him but it is what it is. The only thing that I even 1/2 way believe about my husband right now is that he really does want to quit them. The problem with that is just from reading this forum I have realized that a person can truly hate the drug and wish more than anything in the world that they could (would) quit but actually doing it was another matter. Some finally hit that point where they wanted to quit more than they wanted to keep doing it and some here are still fighting with it. One thing you have to keep in mind tho is that he didnt choose this over you and your child. He just chose to do it and now it does its best to control him and make him choose the drug over everything else. With that said, always keep in mind that yours and your child's well being is more important than anything and if you feel that you have given it your best to help him get clean and he just keeps going back then you may have to make the decision to stay or go. There are a lot of people here who are beating this addiction to opiates everyday, some of them with years of being clean so have faith that it CAN be done but the scary truth is that it is a 50-50 shot.

[sway1]

it's alot like believe half of what you see and none of what you hear from a newly clean addict. yes, we will always be addicts right up til the end. sad but true. the more people he can be honest with about his problems, the better. if an addict messes up, many times they will try to hide it. we need someone who won't pass judgement, because if ti aint honest, than it aint real. it only works if it's real and true. keep posting on here. there are many wiser than i, and always willing to help. good luck. peace.   sway