how could a few strangers help save a life

[butch798]

i am not to bright tec wize but i found a place to talk about a problem .i was in a three year old site.who cares just wanted to write let it out and i .didnt expect anybody to read it.then a couple of beautiful people started helping me.i will try to get the conversation to this site for anyone else who mite need help or want to give support.you can follow my story at ct story from 2010.i am at the bottom of the page  we can talk hear also.

[10356]

It means a lot because you had to fight hard to get yourself and your life back.. We do not forget that very easily.. I sure hope this operation does make you better Butch I will be sending a prayer for this and I will also take your message of Hope and not forget it..

[butch798]

thanks lesa i dont know why it means so much to me to not have to start the days over .i think i remember the pain from the withdrawal so much.i dont ever want to feel like that again.i also dont want to feel that drugged out feeling.i really hate pain meds.this operation might make me all better.i never thought that was possible.i gave up hope they told me all i have is the dope and i became one .now i have hope .i am just afraid .to anyone out there there is hope dont lose it.

[10356]

Hi Butch It has been a while.. Sorry to read you are faced with another surgery and are worried about the pain meds. I had my shoulder replaced My hubby doled out my meds for a lil over 3 our 4  weeks then I quit I went thru minor wd. I did not have to start my days over.. If we take our meds as prescribed do not abuse then we keep counting days but if we start  taking too many our for the wrong reasons like emotional pain a bad situation our boredom then yes we relapsed and give up our clean time. A lot of this is being 100% Honest with yourself... You were more dependent then addicted I think you will do fine as long as you do not stay on them a long time.. stop them as soon as you can manage with meds like Motrin.. Glad to read you are staying busy.. lesa

[butch798]

if i have to take dope for operation do i lose my status as 200 some odd days do i have start again at day 1??seems important to me for some reason.

[butch798]

my wife had the carpel tunnel operation many years ago and it was an easy operation and the results were great but the longer you wait the less you get back.i am getting an epidural shot on feb 4.the last one lasted 2 months  and they used to last 6 months.i should feel better for awhile and then the descion has to be made .but the difference in my life pain free and in pain is so different.my wife has video of me dancing in the streets in st martin with a marimba band and a bunch of people walking down the street  dancing with me.my two boys were with us on the cruise it was like heaven.i look at the video and i cant do that right now.i feel like cinderella .i am great then its 12 oclock and i am back to me.my boy who helped me in the summer do woodworking is in alabama university.so i cant work in the shop no more but your block is waiting for delivery next time southside johnny is in town.my other son is an accountant and still lives at home.now it is his job to keep me busy.we are building a sauna 6 by 8 on the deck all cedar.its huge.the sauna really helps with pain.especially hot yoga.we are also building a 2 family house keeping my business alive .i was on my bulldozer and excavator after the shot .now i got a wait till after shot but its cold out anyway.just wanted you to hear some real good news from someone .you work so hard at helping people put a smile on your face and know that i am one of you success stories.thanks deb

[atthebeach]

Sorry I am trying to type with my hands that need carpal tunnel surgery and are in pain. I hit post by accident.
Wow 228 days that is so wonderful.
It sounds great about the surgery. You will be ok just taking the pills for pain after surgery. Just take as needed and you won't have a problem stopping.
Did you  schedule the surgery yet?

Yes talking with people on the Internet is much different than in person.
You can't see the pain they are in and condition of their bodies from years of use or how the withdrawal is racking their body with pain. You can't feel the hopelessness.
My husband & I minister to addicts so I have unfortunately seen To many people. Sadly  there are too many.

I look forward to getting my cutting board, thank you.
Dancing and cruising you sound great.
Very happy for you.

[atthebeach]

Hey Art,
So good to hear from you. Wow lo

[butch798]

i am so sorry for all you have been threw.med help has been a life saver for me but its never been about a lot of people talking to me .usually its just one stranger caring and that gets me threw and this time its you .thank you so much.love art

[hlpplse]

Butch I love fragrant heart and meditating it is wonderful. You should post a new post on the forum and a lot more people will answer you, sometimes they look at the dates of a thread and respond more to newer ones. I think the amount of time you take meds is directly related to how bad and long the withdrawal is. My second withdrawal was a cake walk compared to when we started down this road, but I was only back on the meds for a few months.
My chronic issues are from being hit by a car when I was jogging, I have had 8 shoulder surgeries 4 ruptured discs and a few severed spinal nerves. Along with a bad closed head injury that affects my eyes and migraines every once in a while. For now Tylenol and ib profuen are doing it ...and I also never want to take pain meds again, however I know that in a few years I will have to have bilateral shoulder replacements so when that time comes I will also be where you are on deciding on surgery. For now my pain is manageable, but if medical science comes out with something minimally invasive that could alleviate my problems and only have to be on pain meds for 1 or 2 weeks I would do it, if I was in constant pain. I have also found for extreme pain Torredol works for me, it is non narcotic, you cant take it often because it is hard on your tummy but it is my go to in case of an emergency. Really cant thank you enough for being my Rock!!!!XXOO

[butch798]

i am worried too.the one thing i have going for me is i hate the feeling of the drugs .i had no cravings when i went threw withdrawals .i didnt want any i still have them in the house and dont crave them or want them.i think i will need them so i heal properly .i just hope i dont get sick in withdrawals .first time went off after a year it was 5 day withdrawal.second time on them after 3 years 28 day withdrawal.thanks for  your support

[butch798]

thanks for being here for me.i will have a little while to decide as the doc is going to give me an epideral in 2 different spots in 2 weeks  but because the last one only  lasted 2 months he sees the writing on the wall.just kind of shocked me he could get me all better.then the operation shocked me.then the dope thing shocked me.the last 2 months have been great 2 cruises dancing in the streets a little rum helped me and working building a house after years without working.i will get threw this just need a little help.hope your are still meditating?i will have to find one for making decisions.

[onthefence]

i often wonder how i would ever deal with the event of a surgery or medical emergency, as i don't want to take any opiates again. I am afraid they would find those extra receptors i created and bind to them , then i would crave real bad., i think when in the hospital i would probably go with what was indicated , but for me i would opt for ibepruefren to take home, or one of the other Nsaids.i would not want them in my home....
I live with chronic pain also, and when i did get on a pain contract i manipulated it for the better part of 8 years.I
I would definitely talk to the doctor in depth about it, when i was 20 days into detox i got real sick and had to have a procedure, instead of fentanyl they gave me propofol because i explained i did Not want opiates.

[hlpplse]

Hey Butch how are You, I am so happy to see your 228 days you inspired me to push on. I hear you on not wanting to go back on pills, but I think you would be fine on them for a week. I have know people who have had that micro surgery and it is miraculous. If you only have to take them for a few weeks as directed I think you should be ok, you never took more meds than you needed and are a chronic pain patient as well. Let us know what you decide and if you do it please keep us updated.  It's really great to see you on here:):):) sending prayers your way.  

[butch798]

so its 228 days and go to doc offers me a micro surgery for my back no more pain not treating symptons but curing the problem.but its an operation and they have to put me back on pain pills for about a week after surgery.i have a dope free life with pain .i worked hard for it.i am scared to have to  take that dope again i hate that feeling.i dont want it .how will it feel when i stop after a week.i had such a terrible withdrawal.but i could really be better after 10 years of pain.is the adicttion stronger then my will to get better.help

[butch798]

thank you so much for your love and if anyone reads this i hope it gives them help in knowing you can get better but it isnt easy.i still have pain and i have set backs but at least i have my soul back.in trying to help my friend on the cruise it hurt real bad  knowing he really wasnt ready but he was a human crying out for help but he really didnt want it.i helped his wife i know and i told her to find a group here and i think she will.the beauty of this site is that the people you talk to arent real you hear there words but you dont see there physical body going threw hell.seeing was too much for me to bare.ps i still have your cutting board ready for delivery next time southside johnny is at the stone poney.love art

[atthebeach]

Hi butch. Wow how awesome to hear from you!!!! Congrats on your clean time. You are doing fantastic. You are living life free from the chains and bondage of Addiction. you sound wonderful.

How cool is that you reached out and gave hope to them, you were there at the right time , for that they will always grateful. That my friend is a beautiful thing.

Look at you building a new, you go butch. The sky's the limit.
Yes I am sure your wife and your boys are glad to have you back.
Keep on keepin on, thanks for checking in.
You give hope and inspiration to those who come after you.
Continued blessings,
Debbie

[digger1976]

My detox partner, thank you too. I'm so very proud of you my friend, giving up your time on a cool vacation to help a fellow struggler is simply beautiful. So glad you are enjoying your sobriety, your boys must be so happy to have you back in the game! Keep it up Butch, I will always have your back! Way to my my friend, truly!

[butch798]

i think i am at about 150 days.i havent been keeping up with you guys because i actually got my life back.i just came back from a cruise to the carribean.i am eating doing yoga and yes i am starting to build another house.while on cruise i met an addict he was pacing the upper floors and he was trying to get off methodone on a cruise.i befriended him and even though it was so painful to see him because i saw myself in the pain he was going threw i had to help.i think i helped his wife more then him .just knowing that i cared gave her hope.to anyone trying to get off there is a life after addiction.keep fighting there are so many loving people on this site and they really made the difference of life and death.life is beautiful again.thank you all

[atthebeach]

wow 62 days yeaaaaa butch.....
i am so happy for you and so glad that you are feeling much better.
you are sleeping, clear headed, eating, enjoying your life independent of opiates.
that is a huge accomplishment my friend.
keep on keepin on.
thanks for keeping in touch,
continued blessings to you and your family,
Debbie

[butch798]

its been a battle but to tell you the truth i almost forgot how bad it was all these little talks are documented and i can look back and see what we all go threw.the love from a bunch of strangers certainly was a major factor in my recovery.i realize my pain aint going a way but i never want to go back to where i was.when the pain comes i have two choices  go back to the hell i was in or just try to bare the pain and use every tool i have heat cold tens box lidoderm patch yoga .i will choose anything over pills.we both have started a new life i want to build one more house and then another until i cant move anymore.for you i wish a happy life a job you like your own house and maybe a lovely young lady to start a family with.my boys were so good to me i wish you two boys as good as mine.peace my friend

[digger1976]

Just found this my friend, I am most certainly still a day behind you and always will be Butch. We helped each other through a world of hurt. Just look at us now though!!!

I'm glad your sleeping better again, I know this was annoying for you and me. I'm so happy your appetite has returned too. So happy to hear your upbeat posts though. I'm doing great now, pretty much the same as you, still struggle with sleep from time to time, but hey I couldn't care less, I am free again like you my friend. Free to chose what I do with my time and not what the drugs allow me to do!!!

You have put a big smile on my face tonight butch, keep on rockin!!!

Your friend, dig, ;)

[butch798]

the best part is being hungry and being tired and going to sleep.keep goin and enjoy your freedom.free to be alive and think again  

[glamisgirl]

Congrats on day 61 butch. I'm right behind you I'm at day 56. Isn't it such a wonderful feeling to be free!!!!

[butch798]

today is day 61 .so to digger you must be at day60 congrads to us and thank every one for there help.life is much better without those drugs.to anyone just starting to get there life back .you can do it