i just dont get it

[BeyondScrewed]

Ok, so I asked about this a few days ago. I know most of u think its probably not the best thing to try but I thoughy id at least give it a shot. I took 1 10mg methadone yesterday just to get some goin in my system. Then last night around 7 I took an oxy and took off my fent patch. Woke up this morning in terrible w/d's. Took 40 mg methadone. Took around 2 hours, but the w/d's all melted away along with my pain. However, its now around 12 hours later and I'm starting to hurt and feel the w/d's cteep back up. What the hell. I thought the long half life shuda kept it goin at least longer than this???

[freelysurrendering]

wow that hit hard and at the perfect time..thank for posting that...i have been on my pitty pot all morning ... why me? that is what has been going through my head ...  thanks for the eye opener ... much love!

[ImDONENoMore]

And I'm sorry if that was harsh, but I'm so afraid for you beyond.  Because I promise you, this kind of stubborn prideful thinking WILL take you down.

[ImDONENoMore]

Or maybe you'll no longer be around by then and this whole issue with worrying about never seeing your son again will be pointless.

You REFUSE to give your wife that kind of control, but that's exactly what you're doing by continuing to use and not getting the help you need.  As long as you are an addict, she will always be in control.

I will also pray for you.  I truly will.

[BeyondScrewed]

I apalogize if you feel as uf I am using you. I do try to respond to the posts that I see that I feel I am knowledgable/qualified to answer.

I know I'm not in control.

I know I need help. But I just refuse to give my wife that concrete evidence that she cud use against me in court. If I lose my son then I don't care about nything nyway.

Again, I'm sorry if ya'll feel like I'm usin u

Maybe ill have somethin positive to say in a few weeks

[IBKleen]

Once again he posts, tells us what he is doing and doesn't return.

It's sad buddy but you haven't hit your bottom yet and you think you are still in control. There is no more that I can say to you without repeating myself and that falls on deaf ears anyway so I will just pray for you.

[Brightfutureahead]

Beyond...Seriously?! I feel for you and am rooting for you. But come on...

My first instinct is to write to you personally and tell you that I feel that you are borderline using us here as you just repeat and repat, and hardly ever respond or answer anyone's questions! But I know that is just my anger at your addiction and I need to work on why I'm reacting to your addiction...honestly I've been there I know it is a powerful thing.

Jeeze, one of the many avenues I tried during my addiction was subs. I remember walking it to that drs office every month, for the first 6 months, insisting that my only problem was the physical ties- mentally I was fine. Now i look back and cant believe how i was acting?! When your addicted your mind is just so--whack!

I type this to you in hopes that you read this (not sure?!) and take away at least some little piece of something someone has written to you. Do you know how concerned some people are?? Remember they take the time out of their day to respond to you...that's saying somthing...it works both ways