insanity

[what2donow]

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing time after time and expectng a different result.With that in mind I have decided to go cold turkey again.My last dose will be tommorow evening. This time I have a few things that are different tho.I have started attending a GREAT N/A group that meets 7 days a week right by my home.I will attend 90 meetings in 90 days.I am also going to be MUCH more active in the forum.It is essental for me to have a support systems and I have learned that from  the times I have failed.This is my thrid try so I hope the thrid times a charm.I will also be following the thomas recipie more closely than I have in the past.Please keep me in your prayers.I am c/t off of about 18 a day...AGAIN.
I want to say sorry in advance for any negitive,cry baby post.I love and you guys so much for being there for me time after time............

[cathy5841]

sorry, your not doing great is how that should have read lol...but you are going to be doing great

[cathy5841]

hey sweet girl.  glad you are doing great.  keep on keepin on.  you are so gonna do this.  you can, you can, you can.  i will be busy at work today but i will be checkin on you.
love ya
cathy

[poetrygirl1960]

I can't promise this, but I'm thinking day 4 will be much better.  I'm so sorry you are having a nasty day, but I'm so proud of you for doing this, you are so brave.  Take a look at the Thomas Recipe and see how many of those things you can get, I know that valium isn't something you can just pick up at the supermarket but maybe the other items.........Anyway I am here for you as you are always here for me, you are in my prayers sweetie.  By the way, you are doing this because you are way too beautiful a person to let this disease beat you!

Love you,
Lisa

[Dieing2Live]

if you keep using the day 1's will continue to get worse. youre doing this because pills are killing you, as with all of us

[what2donow]

OK this is day 1 and I feel like im dying ALREADY.I dont know why its hitting me so hard on day 1, but I have the headache,im freezing,My nose and eyes are running, and I hurt all over.Can someone remind me why im doing this again???
If this is day 1 what will day 4 be like? I am so serious guys, I have never had a day 1 like this........   :(

[Dieing2Live]

you did the right thing just starting it now rather then prolongin the inevitable. im so proud of you. one day at a time

[Rose703]

I'm on day 11 clean and I will be here for you every step of the way. YOU CAN DO THIS!!

[troubleinohio]

thanks for the definition of insanity..i certainly qualify as insane right now althogh it pertains to an entirely different topic than what you were refering to....now.......wishing you best of luck getting through this WD. YOu can do it girl!

[newmanagment]

dont sweat it, you got this!!! it will be better this time, you know your strenghts and weaknesses, and ya are hittin ya NA, that will help a ton!! just keep ya mind rite, dont b worryin bout ne thing but stayin clean and your shawties!!

[what2donow]

Thank you Newmgmt.I just got tired of being worried about tommorow.....I was like, well, if im that scared lets do this sh!t....haha!!! Here we go!!!!!!!

[newmanagment]

good job shawtie, the quicker ya get em outta ya system the betta!! you got this, just stay focused,and keep ya chin up... much love :)

[what2donow]

I just flushed the rest of what I had.I have decided to get this over with.Thanks again guys!!!!

[ladyboop]

They also say, a head full of AA or NA and booze and drugs don't mix...
I wish I could find a good na meeting here.....

  I wish you all well

  LadyBoop

[confused456]

Congratulations on going to NA and on starting again on your road to recovery. I wish you all the best and you can do this. Good luck to you.

[what2donow]

Thank you Lisa.I have to tell ya I dont keep much female company, but you are one of my good friends as well.I love reading your messages and look foward to reading your post with a clear head! Thank you for hanging in there with me  :)

[cathy5841]

hey girl, i am so proud of you for making this choice.  and making these changes.  i agree with the insanity quote.  it is right on the money.  you can do this.  we have faith in you,  have faith in yourself.  you are a dear friend to me when i need you, please know i am here for you too.  i love ya girl...now lets get this done.

[poetrygirl1960]

I have read several of your posts, gotten encouraging messages from you, and you are one of my friends here.  You do nothing but help others, cash in on that here.  If we think you are a crybaby then we have learned nothing from this.  I think you're great and I look forward to hearing from you every day.  Hang in there darlin'  here comes the sun!

Love and Prayers to you,
Lisa

[Mikeinthesouth]

Than call me insane. LOL Hang in there from one who did the same, Mike

[what2donow]

Thank you guys.You two are my main men!!!! Much love to ya both and Im sorry that im going to lean on ya both so much for the next couple of weeks.......

[gizzy32]

i think the N/A meetings are a wonderful idea, you really need to do this and with 2 great support groups you will. i know how bad you want this, but it won't be easy. i like the effort you are showing now to remain clean. aftercare aftercare aftercare. i was the king of relapsing until i had support. you have all the support in the world here.

[newmanagment]

thas how ya get it, keep comin back!!! ya gonna hear that alot at NA,  andits soo true,,, just keep comin back , to us and your group, and you will get it this time too.. i got mad love for ya shawtie, its time to put all this bad stuff behind ya for you and them three lil princesses of yours. so , chin up, 90/4/90, and much love.....