how long?

[Korley]

Can someone please tell me how long I am going to feel this way? I feel so overwhelmed w/ depression. I don't know if it is the chemicals in my body from the pills or all of the guilt, shame and remorse for picking up the pills, or a combo? I only picked up for about a week, but this time the depression seems so much worse. I feel like I will never see the light at the end of the tunnel. I was doing so well before I picked up again, and I was so happy. I have been crying uncontrollably. At least I did make it back to work today, but when will I feel "normal" again? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

[gizzy32]

Since everyone is different, it's hard to say how long it will take. This depression is probably a combo like you said. When I would relapse it will pull me down so hard because at the time i just did not know how to stay clean, i was so full of guilt and shame and felt like i was beaten. I never made it far enough to see the light at the end of the tunnel. We are the hardest on ourselves and right now you need to change those negative thought patterns, dwelling on the past and guilt will only make you feel worse. Find the reason or excuse you use most when you relapse, most of us have one, lol. There are no more excuses, i know you understand addiction, so work on recovery, not guilt.

Making it 30 days, and then 3 months i noticed the biggest differences. At a month i was just breaking out of the fog and by 3 months i started to have faith in my recovery. If you can't believe in yourself, nobody else will so don't be so hard on yourself. I know you can do this. Glad you are gonna try some of the amino's, just look in the health pages in the top right.

[Korley]

Thanks for all of your feedback! I am actually taking Cymbalta, I took a double dose today, just b/c I am so tired of feeling like this. For me the mental part is so much worse than the physical. Don't get me wrong, the physical has been horrible, but this depression is so powerful! This is day 3 for me, and I was taking about 10, 10mg/650 of the hydros. I will try some of the amino acids. Which ones are suppose to be the best? Thanks again to everyone!

[VicAddict26]

I agree that depression comes with the territory of recovery, and in my experience you have to fight that along with the addiction,,, For me taking the amnio acid protocol has really helped,, And it has really been beneficial that when I feel down I don't accept it, I will do something that helps me feel better,, getting your addrenaline going really helps,, exersise or do something that makes you happy,, As for the shame and guilt, really try to learn from your mistakes and move forward, think about the future and where you want your life to be instead of thinking about the things that you have done,, We have all done bad things and made bad choices, but in this process we have the choice to make our lives anything that we want, learn from our mistakes and move forward,, Do you have any sort of aftercare??  The depression will ease up and as time goes on you'll feel better mentally, but working through this process is full of many struggles and we sometimes need help in coping with some of those struggles,,, Recovery is hard but it is the consequences of our actions and you will feel better if you keep fighting, be patient and give recovery a chance,, Our bodies and brains have to regulate and that takes time,, Good luck, and know there are brighter days ahead :)

[Ella789]

  Hi,   From what I know from my own experience,  depression pretty much comes with the withdrawl and remains awhile just to p@@@  us off!   It is a demon within itself to deal with.  I take Cymbalta and I would hate to see what I am like without having it.  Monday I told my dr. that I am still depressed so he doubled my prescription.   I hope you can get some valarian tea or something to help out, I do not want to misinform anyone tho.  I do understand that this helps some.  Others will come on here before long and add their info for you,  Are you useing any of the Thomas Recipe things? l-tyrosine or 5-htp ?  

Ella

[Jen777]

What have you been taking? How much? How long? What day are you on now of withdrawals? I did oxy and Vicoden for about 2 years and went cold turkey so many times. Day 4 you should start feeling better physically but I think I cried for a week. It's because you have ripped away all those endorphins your body was getting from the pills. I also started feeling better but then had a day of hell around day 7. I think it takes about 10 days to really get everything out! Keep up the good work because one day you will wake up and feel like a million bucks! I know this sounds so hard but try and do something to get your endorphins going. You need to kick start your system to start producing them again on your own. Put on your sunglasses and jogging shoes and go far a walk around the block and just ball your eyes out...you WILL feel better. Talk to someone who may know what you are going through or write a journal and just let the tears flow.....trust me. When you get it out you will feel better. Good Luck and keep us posted!

[liscamdave]

I really wish I had an answer for you sweetie. This is a classic example as to why us addicts relapse..Its so hard to get and stay clean. Non-addicts think, "why can't you just stop" "just don't take the pills"

Well, its not that easy, you go from w.d to fatigue to depression...its the worst. I feel for you honey. It will get better, as you already know, it just takes time. Have you looked into 5-htp? It helps with your mood. Look up the amino acid therapy, its a list of vitamins that will help restore what was damaged by drug use alot quicker...

Good luck..

Lisa