refill day!!!!

[lasherslaugh]

Does anyone get those "butterflies" in your stomach even when you pick up the phone to call in your new refill? Then the drive to the pharmacy is like a kid on their way to Disneyland? I wont even mention the feeling you get (i get) once the bottle is actually in my little hand.

[confused456]

Thank you for posting your story and intentions behind the meaning! I hope you have a good evening despite all of this.

[lasherslaugh]

Well, as some of you may know I've been on Methadone (only),. since 1999 and I've tried tapering 2 other times and failed because I walked away when I got down to 11mg. I thought I could handle it, I was wrong. Now I'm on my 3rd. tapper and since I found this site a couple of months ago the tapper has been going better than ever before. You see, before I found this site I had no support at all. I've read some advice on here some people gave out (detox recipes).And not to mention the kindness & support I found here made me feel as if I actually had people who cared about me.You see, I am following a certain recipe I found on this site. It said to soak in baths as much as possible, use aromatherapy soaps, eat well & healthy foods which I have been doing this all, religiously.And on of the recommendations in this recipe was to try to get a prescription of Valium for muscle cramps,anxiety & insomnia. So.I asked the doctor at a family health clinic here in Carson City,NV. & I explained my entire history and current situation with Methadone & that I'm tapering off by myself, and I asked him if he would prescribe 10mg. Diazepam  (generic Valium) and he did. So, to make them last I only take 1/2 tab. each day IF I need it.I also suffer from a slight case of Scoliosis (curvature of the lower lumbar spine) which is extreamely painful every morning and it takes me about 6-7 minutes just to roll over and stand up out of bed.That same doctor offered me some vicodan to help with the pain; can you imagine that?! I turned it down, I feel 200mg of over the counter Motrin works just fine. Now, I have never had a problem (addiction) with Valium. But it helps my anxiety and even my muscle spasms in my lower back because of the Scoliosis, and I can finally leave my house which I couldn't do before from Agorophobia.I am starting to have a life now & see that light at the end of the tunnel. A long time ago I loved going to pick up my refills for vics. that was 20 years ago! However I do feel happy knowing I have Valium to fall back on IF i need it. The first prescription I got was 1 month ago and it was 15 tabs.And I know I'm doing well with my taper and doing it correctly!!! So, if any of you don't understand my post from earlier, All I was trying to say is that I don't miss those days . But when I do and I WILL get another refill I may feel like that again,but only because it's getting me closer to getting clean once & for all!!! Seriously though I didn't think I'd be called a jerk among other choice names & phrases from other people. You see "Flutterby".............   I said other people & their choice phrases, I wouldn't want other people thinking I would ever be that vicious to someone on this site who was only tying to make contact with other people going through maybe the same thing as I,or you. The rest of you all know who you are, I think I'll refer to you as the"All Saints Clique". People like you wont scare me away from this forum, because hypocrites like you make this site seem just ........mean......somebody must get it. Or else we are all in big trouble.Oh, To the one guy who kept calling me a man.................OH,SO VERY WRONG, HA, very wrong. LASHERSLAUGH.  aka jerk, etc.

[opiatehead]

i agree with all you guys .....but however if by chance it was ment to be negitive and to cause bad thoughts to people is that a good thing...ohh i forgot it's a free nation and freedom of speech ...but i do remember refill day hahaha

[Flutterby111]

HOly cow, I missed out on good ole fun here!  Dang family and dinner.....shoot.

[spacecadette]

Hun please keep posting....unfortuneately people often times take things in the wrong way and dont investigate further..(i.e.journals) hence neglecting to understand you better and THAN place a comment.  I personally have never felt the excitement you described in your post  but I encourage you on your journey and apologize....i imagine you must feel pretty awful...whatever stage your at, thinking about quitting, or not sure....keep us updated....remember...we can't please everyon anyhow..

[NautyOne]

with that so well said.......May This Thread Now  


                                                          RIP