severe facial pain from snorting pills... please help!!

[almosthopeless17]

Hi, sorry its a long story, but i want to start at the beginning... I've been snorting pain pills for around 6 years. It was occasional until the last 3 years. I have a few health problems that caused pain and I had bad teeth so the pill use got pretty out of hand. I finally got my pain under control and had my teeth pulled last year and I promised myself that I was done with the pills. About a week after I got my teeth pulled I started noticing pain in my gums which I thought was dry socket so I continued to snort pills for 3 months and the pain spread to my sinuse. I went to the Dr twice and was given antibiotics for a sinus infection. A few more months went by and the pain gradually got worse and I just used that as my excuse to keep snorting the pills January 1st of this year I made my new years resolution to get my life back on track. I have been to a Dr and I am on subutex and I have only been snorting pills when I am in pain. The pain has gotten completely unbearable! I have recently been researching and I realize that this pain is because of the pills. I want sooooo badly to be done with them!!! I have pain in my upper and lower gums, my jaw, my ear, my temple, the roof of my mouth, and my throat. I can see that the flesh inside of my nostril looks white(necrosis) but I don't think I have a hole.  The pain is absolutely unbearable unless I snort another pill! I have tried saline sprays, I eat ibuprofen like pez, I even have a netty pot (sp?) I was just wondering if anyone has any advise. I am 22 and I have been accepted to nursing school and I'm really scared that I'm not going to be able to get this to go away. I should have never let it get this bad, but it was kinda one of those things where I was in denial for so long then one day I woke up and enough was enough. I am confident that my addiction is under control, just looking at the pills makes me hate myself. I work full time and have a busy schedule the only way for me to even be able to go to work is to snort a pill to get the pain under control. Someone please help!! ANY advice is welcome!!! I am willing to try anything (p.s I would go to an ent but I'm scared that that will effect my nursing career... The Dr I go to for subutex is in another state and its cash only/ its kinda shady. I would tell that Dr about my problem but then he will know that I have still been abusing pills and he may kick me out.)  

[almosthopeless17]

Sorry I'm talking so much but this is really the first time one been able to talk to anyone. I still really don't no much about where else to go for help and what not. I don't even have a lot of addict friends, I've kept this a secret for a long time! But I was just thinking... The reason I feel like I'm more in control is because before I decided to get clean I would do 5-6 lortabs a day halving them up, (that's minimal, more depending on $)I could never get enough. Even right after i would do a half I'd be planning when I was gonna do the rest. Now I don't think about them, just when the pain comes. Sometimes I will snort maybe 1/5 of a pill just to get the pain to go away and I'm fine until the pain creeps back up on me. I snorted tylonel for weeks at a time like that cuz I was determined not to buy pills.

[hangetsu]

If you superficially burn your arm applying Morphine topically isn't going to stop the pain. It has to be absorbed into the blood system.

When you snort whatever it is you're snorting the pain stops because it's been absorbed into your system, not because it got on the part that hurts.

[almosthopeless17]

I snorted** 5-6 ...for the past 4 or 5 month I have only been snorting 1-2 a day. I quarter up the pills and just snort a liitle when it starts hurting which is about every 2 hours. Even at night I wake up atleast 3 times in pain.

[almosthopeless17]

I snort hydros, percs, lortab. 5-6 10's a day. Depending on$ I think what really screwed me up was when I realized the pain was from pills I started snorting tylonel to get the pain to stop, ii wanted to be done with pills so bad that I thought "well ill do this for a little while and see if it helps" someone told me that it would help the pain, if only I knew that what I no now. I snorted the subs for a few months but I have been taking it Sub lingually for about a month.

[almosthopeless17]

Shouldnt**

[almosthopeless17]

I should have said I have it under control but I'm cofident that I'm finally at the point that I am determined and I am in the right mind set to get it under control. I have no craving for pills, I don't have to have pills to want to go to work, the pain gets so bad that I literally can't work. I will wake up hours before work and try everything that I can think of before doing a pill. I will try so hard and deal with the pain when I have days off work and it will get to the point where I'm cry out in pain and trembling and I finally break down and snort something. No one in my life knows that I am an addict except my fiance, I've been a surprisingly functional addict. I'm from a smaller town and  there is only one clinic for subutex and I no way to many people that go there, that's why I go to the Dr that I do, I didn't realize how shady it was till I went the first time and poured my heart out to the Dr. And he say " oh" and handed me my script and left. I'm also fairly new to the way that all work   I do feel like I could give up the subutex fairly easily also, I no it sounds stupid, but I donno something just clicked one day I looked at my life and i just wanted to be done.