Aa
woke up thinking of using still thinking about it
my "friend" called me and asked me if i wanted to see him....i know im gonna have to block his number.....i cant keep him as a friend and also a pusher.
im on day four of subs but a small dose....im so conflicted.....i know what the right thing to do is.....but if i was any good at doing what was right i wouldnt be in this jam in the first place.
this is why i think subs suck...it gives you that safety net of oh i can use and just take a sub tomorrow and be fine....when you go c/t you feel every milligram you ever took forcing its way out of you body that alone makes you not want to ever go back....but im an idiot and i did......i dont wanna be a lost cause
im on day four of subs but a small dose....im so conflicted.....i know what the right thing to do is.....but if i was any good at doing what was right i wouldnt be in this jam in the first place.
this is why i think subs suck...it gives you that safety net of oh i can use and just take a sub tomorrow and be fine....when you go c/t you feel every milligram you ever took forcing its way out of you body that alone makes you not want to ever go back....but im an idiot and i did......i dont wanna be a lost cause
Best Answer
COMMUNITY LEADER
It has been 34 minutes since you posted....did you delete and block the number?? This person is NOT your friend. He/she is only looking out for themselves. Most of us have real jobs that we go out and earn an honest dollar. We arent selling drugs. All you are is his rent payment, his utility payment etc and all the while he/she is selling you something that is killing you. Some friend huh?
I am 52 yrs old. Started using around 13 and cleaned up when i was 46. My point is i have been clean for almost 19 yrs total out of those 52 yrs. I used most of my life and i am here to tell you it can be done. Join me on this side of recovery~
I am 52 yrs old. Started using around 13 and cleaned up when i was 46. My point is i have been clean for almost 19 yrs total out of those 52 yrs. I used most of my life and i am here to tell you it can be done. Join me on this side of recovery~
I love the saying that nobody ever died of opiate withdraws - you know this, they $uck though without a doubt. You have got to block those numbers now. You have to take the steps and put in the work. You have worked so hard at this before and you deserve a clean life. Fight for yourself. You CAN do this. You have to change your thought process...your behaviors. Start anew today and throw yourself in that ring...you are ready for the fight!
i am going to delete and block my hook ups numbers today so im not tempted. this has to be done
Sorry to hear of your relapse. You see why it's SO important to cut any ties you have to drugs? You really need to make that a priority, as well as getting to a meeting, start putting together a recovery plan. Something has to change, you can do it.
i caved yesterday :( and used.....the good thing about it was it made me feel guilty and ashamed....i guess i can take a positive out of the negative.
dont wanna be a slave no more no more
dont wanna be a slave no more no more
ok im a loser i folded i answered my phone making a run on my lunch break.....i feel dirty already.
maybe its a good thing that im feeling like this about going to get it.....oh why do i keep fcking this up
maybe its a good thing that im feeling like this about going to get it.....oh why do i keep fcking this up
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
That's why it ***** for you. You think you can do Subs and still use. Until you get your mind right and your life straightened out you're never going to be able to stop using drugs, Subs or no Subs. Never, unless it kills you first.
I was on 8mg Suboxone the last 2 years and used that time to break ties with the people I used to do drugs with, buy drugs from, and places I did drugs at.
Now I have a place of my own. I'm not spending every last dime I have on opiates and going to the local church for supper, my only meal of the day, because I spent all my grocery money on drugs..
I'm not spending 9-10 days at a time laying on the couch sick as a dog going through withdrawals, only to go find more opiates once I got well.
I don't have to worry about getting busted or shot, and I don't have to worry about where, or if, I'm going to be able to get the drugs I need to make it one more day through that hell that substitutes for a life. And I lived that life for over 30 years before I finally had enough of it.
3 months ago I started tapering myself down and went from 8mg a day to 0.25mg a day without so much as one night when I didn't sleep. It didn't even start to begin to compare with the withdrawals I went through from Methadone, Dilaudid, or Oxycontin.
Now I've been off all drugs for the past few days and not haven't any withdrawal symptoms or PAWS at all. I know about the long half-life, but was on 0.5mg a say for several weeks and 0.25mg a day for a few days before I stopped, so it's not because I still have a lot of it pumping through my system.
You can blame it on Suboxone, your friends, the dog, or anything else that you like, but it come down to you. It's your life, you are the one that has to change, and no pill is going to do it for you. It's only going to give you the chance to change, if you let it, and you work at it.