Aa
3 weeks....ahhhhh!
This has not been easy. This has not been a high, or fun, or comfortable. But it has been WORTH it.
I realized last night that every relapse I have had has been due to a lack of desire to change old behaviors. I realized last night that I wanted SO BADLY to stay clean, but I did not want to RECOVER... there is a HUGE difference.
Today I have 3 weeks and feel as though my life is flipped upside down, and I am TOTALLY okay with that. My life was completely out of control, and now it's finding it's niche. I am falling down, but I am getting back up. I am learning and I am open minded today to any and all suggestions....
This has not been easy, but it's simple, really. I stay clean, just for today. I don't use people places or things to make myself feel better, and I work the steps.... right. Got it.
Starting to love myself-
Starting to know sympathy, empathy, compassion and love. It feels foreign, it feels good, it feels bad and it feels amazing!!! I am totally okay with this confusion.Thank God I GET to feel it.
Stay on the ride folks...it's well worth it.
Love you all,
Amy
I realized last night that every relapse I have had has been due to a lack of desire to change old behaviors. I realized last night that I wanted SO BADLY to stay clean, but I did not want to RECOVER... there is a HUGE difference.
Today I have 3 weeks and feel as though my life is flipped upside down, and I am TOTALLY okay with that. My life was completely out of control, and now it's finding it's niche. I am falling down, but I am getting back up. I am learning and I am open minded today to any and all suggestions....
This has not been easy, but it's simple, really. I stay clean, just for today. I don't use people places or things to make myself feel better, and I work the steps.... right. Got it.
Starting to love myself-
Starting to know sympathy, empathy, compassion and love. It feels foreign, it feels good, it feels bad and it feels amazing!!! I am totally okay with this confusion.Thank God I GET to feel it.
Stay on the ride folks...it's well worth it.
Love you all,
Amy
ahhhh, way to go...I mean.....grow Amy!!!
At least it's "clean" confusion!!!! You are doing amazing Amy, keep it up!!!!
Love the 2 kinds of days Guv. Wise indeed.
bob
At least it's "clean" confusion!!!! You are doing amazing Amy, keep it up!!!!
Love the 2 kinds of days Guv. Wise indeed.
bob
Great posts guys...a reminder that unless we fix the foundation, the house will "rock" and "crumble".
Congrats on an amazing 3 weeks!!
~ Free
Congrats on an amazing 3 weeks!!
~ Free
Your right it is simple, all you have to do is follow directions, as the blue NA book says.
With you now well on your way to recovery, I will tell you a little secret. We, in recovery, only have 2 kinds of day.
1. Good Days- days when everything goes our way and nothing goes wrong, and we dont use.
2 Great Days- days when nothing goes our way, everything goes to sh!t, and we still dont use.
Here's to more Good and Great days ahead.
With you now well on your way to recovery, I will tell you a little secret. We, in recovery, only have 2 kinds of day.
1. Good Days- days when everything goes our way and nothing goes wrong, and we dont use.
2 Great Days- days when nothing goes our way, everything goes to sh!t, and we still dont use.
Here's to more Good and Great days ahead.
Hi Amy,
Congrats on your 3 weeks, can i say it again? 3 weeks of being clean! Every time i feel like giving up & think i am never going to get this monkey off my back i just read one of your posts and say to myself if Amy could quit a 40 day a pill habit i can quit my addiction. When i am feeling weak & want to take a pill i just get on here & read & read all the posts of so many who have quit. I spent most of my life in pain but w/o pills so i know i can do this.
No matter what you take to if it affects your life in a negative way then it has become an addiction. I have used up all my excuses to continue down this road which is leading me nowhere, except an early death. I want to thank you Amy & all of the people on here who have posted their trials & tribulations. You have all shown me that there is a light at the end of this long dark tunnel i have been in. It is still mostly dark but i am beginning to see a flicker of light.
You are truly an inspiration to me Amy.
Love ya girl! Katie
Congrats on your 3 weeks, can i say it again? 3 weeks of being clean! Every time i feel like giving up & think i am never going to get this monkey off my back i just read one of your posts and say to myself if Amy could quit a 40 day a pill habit i can quit my addiction. When i am feeling weak & want to take a pill i just get on here & read & read all the posts of so many who have quit. I spent most of my life in pain but w/o pills so i know i can do this.
No matter what you take to if it affects your life in a negative way then it has become an addiction. I have used up all my excuses to continue down this road which is leading me nowhere, except an early death. I want to thank you Amy & all of the people on here who have posted their trials & tribulations. You have all shown me that there is a light at the end of this long dark tunnel i have been in. It is still mostly dark but i am beginning to see a flicker of light.
You are truly an inspiration to me Amy.
Love ya girl! Katie
hey girleee ...congrads on 3 weeks..your working your recovery and it shows..you cant loose with your attitude so im sure you will be successful ...you have realized that there are some days that are better then others....some people think that every day is going to be great....im sorry to say recovery an't that way ...it's one day at a time both good and not so good days come and go but you have leared to pick yourself up when you fall
and yes isent great just to FEEL again...every day is a learning experience and life comes at you full blast without narcotics...it takes some getting use to...im 95 days into this thing and still find my self confronted with new emotions and challenges daily
but the end result ...sobriety is so so worth it....keep up the good work girlee
good luck and god bless Gnarly
and yes isent great just to FEEL again...every day is a learning experience and life comes at you full blast without narcotics...it takes some getting use to...im 95 days into this thing and still find my self confronted with new emotions and challenges daily
but the end result ...sobriety is so so worth it....keep up the good work girlee
good luck and god bless Gnarly
whoop~whoop!! Nice going. You are a true inspiration. You made me really think about the differnece between clean and recovery. God Bless you!
COMMUNITY LEADER
Recovery looks real good on you girl. Congrats on the clean time!!!!! sara
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