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Partner drives drunk

Hello,

I have a situation that I dont feel like I am equipped to deal with. My partner is a binge drinker. I am not sure I'd call him an alcoholic, but when he drinks, he dtunks himself into oblivion. He went to watch some basketball games today, and invited me to join him later. When I arrived, he was very drunk. As we were leaving, I said I'll drive and we could get his car in the morning. He refused, and got in his car anyways and drove. So 2 things: he drove drunk, and he drove drunk knowing that it would make me unhappy. Now we are home and I am getting insult ann dyer insult slung at me, I am trying to get him to see that I don't wsnt him driving because it is dangerous and he could get a dui, but it is all on my shoulders, I am the horrible evil person who was in a watch hunt. How am u supposed to act here? What am I supposed to say??? I am obviously not getting thru and making everything worse!
4 Responses
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3060903 tn?1398565123
Keep it in mind, an alcoholic, when they finally do get help will not thank you for enabling them, (especially if it means a 10 year manslaughter charge)

In fact, many alcoholics when they finally do receive help do not go back to their enabling spouses....

you're damned if you do, and damned if you don't , i get that.
and i feel for you. but what makes the most sense of the difficult choices you have to make?
Helpful - 0
3060903 tn?1398565123
Denial will stop an alcoholic getting help regardless of who they hurt, it is part of the disease of alcoholism.

If you cannot reason with him then you have no choice but to help him. A friend of ours killed his passenger driving drunk and paid for it with a lengthy jail term.

You can arrange for his first impaired charge resulting in no jail time, and his license being taken for one year,...
and save him from a possible 10 year sentence for vehicular manslaughter
it's a tough choice,
but hopefully it has become clearer to you what your real options are.
and why you must act upon them.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Ditto caregiver222 !!

The four pre-school Children and Their Mother are the #1 concern here !! (and all other innocent people on the street)

A DUI would have been earned and deserved !!  
Helpful - 0
144586 tn?1284666164
(1) Call the police on 911 when he ids in this condition, give them the plate number and identification of the car and have him arrested!

(2) re-read suggestion (1)

Are you waiting for four pre-school children and their mother's are killed, paralyzed or maimed for life  by this sickening irresponsible moron?

He doesn't need therapy He needs...well I can't say what he needs here..
Helpful - 0

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