Difficultry keeping an erection. Maybe anxiety?

[savemebarry8]

Hi, I'm a 18 years old guy I recently started having sexual relationships with my girlfriend. It's the first time I have sex so I have quite a few questions... The one that concerns me the most is that even though I do get erections, I just can't keep it long enough. I don't want her to think that she's doing anything wrong because she's beautiful and I am sexually attracted to her but I don't know, I just get so nervous. Also, I've been on antidepressants for about a year now (paroxetine) because I was diagnosed OCD. I heard that this medication can cause temporary trouble on sexual desire, but on the other hand I also read somewhere that it's quite common for young men to experience this the firs time they have sex. Can the medication be related? Thank you in advance

[savemebarry8]

I am going to therapy and actually the meds I'm in are just temporary and I'm actually reducing the dose progressively. I don't know if I have OCD or not (my therapist often refers to it as "intrusive thoughts") but whatever it is therapy is definitely working for me and my life is much better now. The reason why they put me on medication was because by the time I went to see my therapist for the first time, my anxiety levels were so over the top I couldn't even let my life function properly. However I'm probably going to be completely off-meds by the end of the summer. Thank you for your response! :D

[Paxiled]

You're right on all counts.  Men old and young have very fragile egos, and that can show in sexual performance.  Now, there are also biological reasons this can happen, but it almost never does in an 18 year old.  The problem with early sexual experiences is that usually neither of you knows what you're doing -- an experienced woman can often help an inexperienced man or even an experienced one who is having a temporary problem.  They can figure it out together.  That's harder when you're both likely not to have much experience.  I would guess most men go through this at least a couple times in their lives.  Now, it's easy to say don't worry, but that's the key -- don't worry, just let it play out.  If it doesn't happen with this woman, it will with the next.  That's just how it goes sometimes.  As for antidepressants, yes, they can also cause problems for men and women.  It's usually being unable to reach orgasm very easily, and a drop in sexual desire.  But it can also be that it's sedating you, making you tired, and as you suffer from anxiety, that makes it tougher for you to just let it play itself out.  I doubt you actually have OCD -- a much overdiagnosed condition.  I also wonder why you were put on that medication, or any medication, at such a young age -- did anyone suggest you try therapy first?  That's a tough med, and not one to start with.  Do not just stop taking it to see if it helps -- this med has to be stopped very carefully and slowly if you ever decide to do so.  So it can be the med, and it can be just you being nervous.  No way to tell.  But both are possible.