I'm terrified of meningitis?

[animonster]

So tonight at dinner I accidentally took a bite or of my roommates hamburger instead of mine.  I have GAD and now I am terrified that I have meningitis, or that I'm going to develop it! Please someone help I'm scared I'm going to die. I don't take meds to control my anxiety and as of late its been ruining my life! I am so afraid of catching it or something else and it killing me or ruining my life. What are the statistics on surviving unscathed,  or at all? Please someone anyone help as soon as possible. I'm scared and it's making me feel hopeless and lost. I need help now please! What should I do?  Do I go to the er? Or do I wait to see? I don't want the doctors and nurses to think I'm crazy but I don't want to wait to long and die either!  Please help I feel trapped and worried!

[persephonedemeter]

Actually, I know what you mean. It was also the same with me. Good luck with the therapist. I hope it is someone who spends time to address your anxiety with practical solutions as well as help you realize and develop the strengths you have, as well as new ones to overcome your anxieties and other challenges in the future. Personally, I don't think I need to wish you well: I'm pretty convinced you will do very well:) At least, that's how I feel.

[animonster]

Hey sorry I took so long to reply.  I am currently in the process of switching all my files and paper work to a new therapist. As for your question... I'd have to say is when I realized I was alone, clichéd as It sounds I realized I had to do everything for myself.

[persephonedemeter]

I do have a question for you. When was the first time that you can recall when you realized you significantly found yourself vulnerable, exposed, on your own or unsafe? What happened when you first realized that? It's a question that popped in my head when you said you weren't  really sure how it came about. I can remember my first time, and When I remember  it, I feel my legs feeling like they are going to collapse under me. I also did not cope well for a period of time. That level of anxiety and fear  pops up every once in a while and, usually, I can effectively de-escalate it swiftly and work with it. Everyone has anxieties and fears. It's part of our survival wiring, but it is how and what we do with it that determines how we are able to cope or undergo it. In the past, and every so often, I will get anxious or fearful where I will call someone and need support. I call a couple of friends who are good at "talking me down" or my doctors or that therapist I told you about, when I became unsure or start getting "muddled or lost." Those kinds of phone calls happen very rarely now. I also get calls from friends and family like that, and just an objective or outside view helps, because when we go through fears and anxieties, they  narrow our vision and our thinking. What I do and what they do, is help open up that vision and thinking so that you get a wider view. It gives a grounding effect essentially. It seems that you respond to that very well. That is something I think you need to know.

[persephonedemeter]

That definitely will not do you great service or improvement to have a therapist who does not support you or is proactive in helping you de-escalate your anxieties. If you are able to talk yourself out and listen to someone like me on an online forum, no less, then, it is very possible and very likely that you can overcome this issue. Is she or he your first therapist? I've been in your shoes in the same situation where I had a few therapists who were not very helpful. One time, I spent too much time and too much money  for a therapist who did not improve anything, and I felt like I was going in circles rehashing things over and over again. Then, I asked for a direction, and all she came up with was another question, which was something, "Like what?" That was when I knew I was paying for a therapist in the dark. I looked for another, and found a therapist who was more practical, more determined to get me to a better and stronger place, and directed me and even gave me encouraging pushes while still giving me the freedom to decide my own course and be able to develop my own strengths, Basically, she was someone who set her sights, along with mine, to not smother me with a lot of handholding or be just a sounding block. She was a teacher, a mother, an advisor, a refuge, and someone who allied me. She also made a lot of effort to give me resources. I made great strides with her. We learned a lot from each other. At this time, I do not see her regularly, but, occasionally, I call and have a series of sessions with her, when I feel I need more support, another ear or take on the thing that bothers me or situation  I am going through, and I definitely want a very confidential and objective ear.

I had to shift through a lot of therapists before I found her. Much like interviewing someone who I would work with or hire. We spend considerable effort and time looking for cars, places to live, and even what sort of shampoo to use, but when it comes to therapists or even doctors, we take what is offered and wonder if it is ourselves that is an incorrigible problem, when, in fact, it is who we settle to work with. I don't think anyone would keep or pay for  a cleaning service, carpenter or a cook who just sits there, even if they give us momentary and fleeting joy  with their company. I am not looking for companionship and I don't need to pay for psuedo-friendship. I had a doctor who I absolutely could not warm up to and actually was a cold fish, but he knew his stuff, treated me with very distant respect by 2 miles length (in the same room, he was that cold of a personality and a bit of a snob), but, strangely, he and I could work together, because, at least, he was willing to share information, really was expert in his field and did very good work,  and gave me complete attention, even if it was just himself talking to me from up high on a mountain. Thank heavens, it was short and he was someone who I consulted for a short time.

Write down what you want to achieve, and what you expect from a therapist. It helps you stay objective in your search. The therapist I have, surprisingly, is not a PhD, (She has a masters in family therapy)  and she is 20 years younger than me, but she definitely is someone who fits my needs and goals. I also did not pay out of my pocket the first .3 therapy sessions with her.Insurance oaid for the 3 as trials, and ponied up to paying total costs. If I was paying out of pocket as I did before, a long time ago, I spent the first session interviewing them and then, trying out a little therapy to see what they were like. There were a couple of times when, after 5 minutes of my interview questions, I knew from their response that it wasn't going to work out. Just to let you know, I told them over the telephone before I made the appointment, that I would be interviewing them. One therapist said right when I said that, that she was not going to play games, and I said, "Thank you for not wasting my time." hung up, and crossed her off my list. I did get to the point where I was wondering if there was one out there for me, and in San Francisco, there are, at least, 40 therapists to every Starbucks in town, and we have a Starbucks in every corner, it seems. However, I knew it was better off to go the self help route or spend time talking to a dog than spend time and money on someone who couldn't help me.

[animonster]

I'm currently trying to transition to someone new. My old therapist doesn't really listen and it's frustrating. I am not really sure when this all came about, but I don't know how to deal with it either. Thank you for helping me reason or talk myself down I always seem to go from I'm fine to immediately in danger at really anything from a bug bite to a cough.

[persephonedemeter]

I forgot this tidbit of information. People usually recover with viral meningitis without having to be treated with antibiotics, be in hospital isolation, etc. I am assuming you are worried about meningitis through contagion.

[persephonedemeter]

Sorry, awkward  sentence. Hardly anyone  with meningitis would feel up to eating a hamburger.

[persephonedemeter]

If your roommate does not have meningitis, viral or bacterial, then the chances of you getting it from a hamburger is absolutely in the negative region of absolutely not.

is your roommate being treated for meningitis? Is he/she in an isolation room in a hospital with restricted visitation?

Reason it out. If you think you got meningitis from your roommate, don't you think it your roommate would be having symptoms? Frankly, I doubt if anyone had meningitis they wouldn't feel up to eating a hamburger or want to be in a room with the lights on. Nor would your roommate  be able to bend his neck without discomfort to eat a hamburger and  without feeling nauseous or throwing up.

I hope you are seeing a therapist about the GAD. I see previously that you suspected you had a concussion or head injury from falling can lids. I sympathize with you, but I think getting someone to help you to keep the neurological fears down would be better than being so overwhelmed by it. I wonder what is going on inside you that is translating into a fear vehicle  of neurological conditions. You have some insight from what I read in your post.