please help me

[justinsgrandma]

Im 57 and i have severe anxiety attacks panic disorder and agoraphobia. Lately im so stressed out im afraid of having a heart attack. My daughter moved in with me 3 years ago. She already had 3 kids and was pregnant homeless and no money so im her mom i took them in. A month later the twins were born. I helped her to the babies strong. Then 4 months later she was pregnant again with another set of twins.  I have been taking care of them ever since. She is 32 and has made no effort to take care of herself. All she seems to worry about is getting a man. Her man is very abusive he hits the kids and screams at them. Last night i went to try and stop him and he hit me with a broom handle. Then he threatened me. Hes being evicted from his apt and he wants to move in here. So now hes trying to convince my daughter to put me in a mental hospital or a home so they can take my subsidy and live in my house. Im so stressed i feel like im dieing. What sbould i do. My anxiety is crippling me!

[nursegirl6572]

I'm so glad you reached out, good for you!  I agree that calling the police is a good idea also at this point.  Better to get that ball rolling now, IMO.

Please keep us updated.

[birdie0907]

You should also call the police right now because they will be getting involved anyway, so the faster the better.

[justinsgrandma]

My housing person came over today she is also a social worker. I told her everything. Also my daughter was not home she had left all 7 children alone with only my 12 year old grandaughter to take care of them. There is no food here and the kids were hungry. I dont know whats going to happen now. She was very upset about the abuse im suffering and the neglect of the children. My anxiety and panic is threw the roof right now. Please God help me and these babies.

[birdie0907]

You said you have a subsidy. Perhaps this means you are low income - if so you may have access to free legal services. The police may create the restraining order for you - that happened to my friend.

Do what nursegirl said now, and remember CYS has to protect those children. Your daughter is not capable of raising them, at least at present, and you can't do it so CYS will have to figure it out.

[nursegirl6572]

I'm so sorry you're going through this.  You need to notify the authorities IMMEDIATELY.  Call the police, notify CYS of the child abuse, get a restraining order, and kick your daughter to the curb NOW.  I'm sure you're scared hon, but you have to take the control back.  Do NOT let ANYONE treat you this way, it's NOT okay.  Also, someone has to be an advocate for those poor children.

Call the police right now.  Please.

Keep us updated, you're in my thoughts and prayers.

[justinsgrandma]

I am ashamed to admit that after he hit me my legs were hurting so bad and i was so shocked that my own daughter stood there an watched that i just limped upstairs and layed on the floor and had a terrible panic attack. I did try an reach my son who lives in another town. I finallly got in touch with him an he says he wont let my daughter and her b/f put me anywhere. I live in a very smalll town and we have very few agencies that help. Im so afraid of my daugbter and her b/f and i dont know what our keystone cops will do if anything. Im shaking so hard right now i feel like i cant move. What can i do. How do i sfop this panic?

[Paxiled]

He hit you with a broom handle?  Did you call the police?  If what you say here is accurate I'd think it's time to protect yourself.  If you have the financial means it might also be time to talk to a family practice lawyer if this person is really trying to take your home.  I don't phrase this because I don't believe you, it's only because we only have one side of the story on these forums, so I try not to jump to conclusions.  But again, if this is true, you need to protect yourself.

[birdie0907]

The first step is to call the police because he also hit you. They are the only ones who can deal with violent people because the offender does not respect weaker people like you. Violent behavior doesn't get better when the violent one is stronger than the others.

[birdie0907]

In response to your first post above, it is illegal for him to hit anyone, so you are not the one who has the mental imbalance - it is him. It is also illegal for him to mentally abuse them as well, in the sense that if they were living together the authorities would take steps to have the children separated from him - first they would put the kids in a protective environment away from both parents since your daughter is incapable of making the right decision. After a while the parents MIGHT be successful in petitioning to get them back - Likely some abuse courses etc. would be necessary depending on the Ohio laws. Do you live in a city, and if so how big is it? There are resources like distress call centers where you can find a helpful ear to explain the issues to.
Since they are living apart the authorities would put some kind of protective or restraining order in place to prevent him from entering the house they are in.

[birdie0907]

I posted your new comment below so all your issues are on one thread. Please keep posting here as someone will respond.

By justinsgrandma | 4 hours
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Is this my anxiety? I feel very weak and shaky its all i can do to walk around. My heart pounds and i feel like i will collaspe. I cry all the time. I have a doctor coming to the house on wednesday. What is wrong with me. I have had anxiety and panic for 35 years and have tried everything and nothing has helped. Is it all this stress??? Please help me