I wish there were something I could say that would make you feel better but that is not realistic.
You seem to have what many of my patients describe as "battlefield anxiety" which describes how every day is a like going into combat, everything feels dangerous and terrifying, like walking through a vast minefield and the worst is that you don't know if you will make it through the day. I think you're going to be okay but you need to contact your doctor today, tell him/her that you need to see him today or tomorrow and that it is urgent. Do not take no for an answer.
I understand the need to self-medicate but I think you would agree that it is not a good idea and is not a long-term plan for getting you back to feeling normal which is what you and your doctor need to work on.
When you took anti-depressants, did you try Remeron? It is a very sedating AD with has some anti-anxiety properties as well.
Something to talk to your doctor about are two older drugs. I have had success in prescribing them for anxiety in patients and with great success. The drugs are Prolixin and Stelazine. They are strong drugs of the anti-psychotic class. I have found that at a very low dose they can be very effective for treating traumatic anxiety. It is true that they are used for schizophrenia but at a much higher dosage. I believe they are safe and often profoundly effective at low doses (.5 mg to 1 mg).
Please contact your doctor today. I will hope that you do and that you feel better very soon.
First of allyou should talk to your doctor about what is happening with you. And if they determine you may need further help, then they may refer you to a mental health professional about your anxiety. I have bad anxiety. It is better lately and xanax hasn't been needed. But I also have bipolar and that's a whole other ball of wax. Either of them doesn't make the other let up...I ain't no doc, but the cessation of alcohol could be the cause of the anxietyespecially since you been doing it quite a while now.. bottom line...SEE YOUR DOC
I would advise you to see a doctor that you really trust and tell he/she that you are self-medicating after failed anti-depressant treatments. I have really bad anxiety issues as well but I have never had to self-medicate myself for my anxiety. I currently take Zoloft (50 mg), recently prescribed, and I still have good days and bad days. I would recommend seeing a mental health professional, I have thought about it myself. I think there is only so much anxiety and stress a body can undergo physically, mentally, emotionally,etc. and sometimes it gets to difficult to straighten things out on our own and it might help if you saw a mental health professional to help you sort through emotional/physical/mental issues that will hopefully allow you to be able to enjoy life. If you happen to be a religious person you could pray and ask for help during this difficult time. Goodluck.
I used to feel just like you but had many mood swings. I found a dr. that finally told me I was bi-polor and gave me a med called Seroquel. This med has stopped my worring, it is great. I take it at night and all my worry has gone - well not all but most of it. This med is really great for sleep and worry.
>My mind will never shut down and I feel like I am losing my mind.<
Angel, let me tell you...I can completly relate to this. In my early 20's, my mind just would not slow down. Not even while I slept! I'd wake for a moment and find myself still thinking!
Almost nightly, I had nightmares. What I called, "combat dreams."
I was ALWAYS either trying to run away/fight off bad people or franctically searching for my lost/kidnapped kids. I would wake up utterly exhausted. Back in the days when I was drinking 2 pots of coffee.
My life, at the time, manifested into my dreams. Once I changed the situation (and it was a very large one)...the dreams disappeared and my mind slowed down.
>I am not depressed at all but terrified of death and usually I convince myself that I am dying by the end of the day.<
Dying, how? Emotionally and/or feel that it's physical?
Have you ever had your thyroid checked? I know that hyperthyroid can cause anxiety.
To be on the safe side, here is a site you can check for drug interactions as well as side effects: http://www.drugdigest.org/DD/Interaction/ChooseDrugs/1,4109,,00.html
I have been on I think every anti-depressant known to man and they had such a terrible effect on my life that they actually terrify me. They increased anxiety and made me extremely depressed when normally I am very happy just overly anxious and worried about everything to the point that I just can not sleep. I went to my doctor on Thursday ( last week) and he diagnosed me with Restless Leg Syndrome? I have been having pains all down the back of my legs at night to the point that I can not get comfortable. He prescribed Requip which is a new med just fda approved. It sucks :) (sorry, but it does not help me at all) and then Ambien for a sleep aid. This has not helped either. It seems like any doctor I talk to does not listen when I try to tell them what is going on. I do not know what to do. Any suggestions would be much appreciated.
Angel, I am so sorry to hear about your sleep disorder. I also have a problem falling asleep & then have horrible nightmares. I take 1 regular Ambien to help me fall asleep with one Ambien CR to time-release-keep me asleep & not remember what I dream. It has taking 1 1/2 years to finally get the right combination to help.
Hang in there & please go to a specialist; Psycologist psychiatrist. Keep on going until you get the help that you need.
Have you visited a mental health specialist? Sometimes talking to someone (a specialist) other than your GP, other than taking drugs, can sometimes help drastically. I hope you find your way though this.
Angel, just a quick note. I had the same problem as you with regard to not being able to shut off my mind. I had hideous reactions to most AD as well. Celexa almost killed me. But my doctor put me on Remeron and that was a life saver. Unlike the SSRI's, it did not jack up my anxiety levels (this is an unfortunate side effect that many people get when starting SSRIs). My personal experience with Remeron was excellent. I had horrendous bouts of insomnia, coupled with acute anxiety. My doc prescribed Remeron - 15mg. I took 1/2 the pill the first night (because I was afraid of the side effects I had from the SSRIs) and it knocked me flat out for 14 hours. Literally 45 minutes after taking it the floor was moving sideways and I had to get to bed - immediately. My psych doc eventually upped my dosage to 45mg (as there is an inverse relationship between dosage and level of sedation) and my mood and sleep has dramatically changed. The remeron no longer knocks me flat out, but I do feel relaxed and going to sleep is easier. The big drawback from Remeron is weight gain (you'll be eating sugar straight from the bag). Also, please note that medicine really should be used to augment therapy. Therapy is a life saver, so please try to see someone.
I have an idea that has done a few impressive things for me.go to a gym,get a personal trainer,GET A MEAL PLAN,it takes disipline and you have to be consistant and tactful about it,although ive found that you do not have to train like a professional athlete to bennefit from what it can do for you.ill tell you though,i sleep better when i exercise,i eat better when i exercise,and most of all i am more myself everyday.the people who listen to this advice is a low percentage,it takes time.ive found though that the more you can talk to your trainer and completely be honest with them the better it goes.i hope this helps,ill never stop preaching this one even when im off the gym wagon myself.i started meds once a long time ago,and was ALWAYS on alert when i took that stuff.i only took it a couple of times and refuse to take them.then awhile ago i started hearing about teenagers having problems with them and that really put a cork in it,i would not and will not have anything to do with them.maybe,if one day theres a mental health drug that satifies my concious??????????i know this is touhg advice,but i dont make a living at selling gym memberships or personal training,its somehting thats natural.
The exercise is good advice, except it doesn't work for everyone. I have had onset insomnia for thirty years and have almost always needed to find ways to sleep. For twenty of the thirty years I rand from 8 to 10 miles a day. I have run the Marine Corps Marathon, and have been in two iron man contests. My knees are in terrible shape, and I had back surgery. I haven't let that stop me though, I swim two miles at least five days a week. In the middle of the night, you can usually find me sitting and reading a book, because I'm am almost always awake.