Kindergarten Anxiety

[BradyBoysMom]

My son has attended pre-school since he was 2 slowly working up to 4 days a week from 9-1 last year. He was extremely excited about going to Kindergarten asking throughout the summer is it was time yet. After the first day he had what we felt was probably very normal feelings about it - doesn't like it, says its boring, all that. A few days later he started crying as soon as he wakes up and my husband leaves him in his class crying. He cries on and off throughout the day. He was fine on Friday and said he had a great day. This morning I asked him a question and he immediately started crying.

It all seems to be about the number of days in the school year. I guess they count down the number of days each morning.

We've showed him the school calendar with the days highlighted and he agrees that it doesn't look like that many days. We've explained that he went to Pre-K for that many days. He knows that all his cousins and friends go to school the same number of days. Nothing is working.

We're trying a reward system. If he goes to school without tears for X number of days someone will come have lunch with him and/or his grandad will pick him up. He stated this morning that he didn't want any special treats.

I'm at a complete loss! Please help!

[lexchlmoo]

also, all kids are different, so just give him time.  and lots of support.  and don't try to stress so much, since it may make him stress more too.

good luck!

[lexchlmoo]

i'm actually going thru this with my little girl, though not this server.  maybe not talking about the days so much would help.  try focusing on something that he likes about the school or something that he might like or something that he use to like at his old school that his new school has to offer.  

he may actually be feeding off your vibes.  are you stressing too or anxious about the situation?  my little girl started headstart this past week.  she's been going to daycare since she was 1.  and i've never had any problems with her.  but last week she would start crying, but then she would say she had fun.  so there where mixed feelings, but this only happened in the morning time when we dropped her off.  and i was worrying about her starting a new school, though i never said anything in front of her, maybe she was feeding off my negitive vibes.  she did fine this morning, though i did tell her if she didn't act like a big girl i was just going to walk away with out my kiss and hug from her and she did fine this morning.  she didn't cry.  she gave me a hug and kiss and ran to her teacher.  but this is monday.  she could change by the end of the week.  plus she had a 3 day weekend this past week.  so maybe she just needed to adjust and have a break.

i think she was mad at me too, cause she is missing her old teacher and friends.  i told her she'll see them again once she starts pre-k.  but she hasn't brought that up since last week and she's making new friends over there.

i try to focus on the positive stuff.  how was your day?  did you have fun?  what did you do?  color?  play outside?  she really loves the slide they have there, i guess the playground area is a lot better then at her old daycare.  and we've explained to her that she is getting older that she has to  move up.  and explained that her sister did it and her little brother will do it too once he's a big boy.  we emphasize a lot about being a big girl, she likes to know she's being a big girl.  and try to show that we are proud of her when she acts like a big girl, not necessarily use "rewards" for that.

maybe there was a big change in his schedule versus his pre-k.  try having a casual conversion about his class to see if he brings up anything his dislikes.  but don't ask him if he dislikes anything.  but do ask what he did like?  maybe that will help him focus on the good or fun part of school.  

hope something has helped.

[specialmom]

OH boy this is my fear.  I have a son starting kindergarten in a week.  I wonder if you could contact his teacher.  She may have some ideas and maybe she'd change how she does the calender thing if it is causing so much anxiety.  She could also tell you how he is doing otherwise at school.  While he may be unhappy at home if he is coping and doing well during his school day, that would be a plus.  I'm so afraid of this myself, I hope it works out.   I talked to our school couselor last week as my son has some challenges and she told me that if I didn't feel like it is going well----  talk to the teacher.  The sooner the better.  Good luck