STEPMOM FRUSTERATED

[rebbecca]

Almost a year ago my husband has got his daughter Brianna very other week for 7 day then her mom gets her 7 days. Well the thing is when we have Brainna I do everything from taking her to the doctor to going to meet her teacher and I dont have a problem with it until her mom decided that I can do all of this on her week also.  Now me and my husband do not ask her for anything when we have her. Her mom is always telling us that she doesnt have money for clothes, shoes and also school supplies before it started.  So I went out and bought all of Brianna school supplies but I told my husband that we cant afford to buy clothes for her house because we already have to do it here. She also feels that I should get Brianna on and off the bus everyday even when it is her responiblity to take care of it. She said that I should because I already get my son on the bus. I am starting to feel like a babysitter instead of her stepmom.
When I was getting Bri on and off the bus she would drop her off at 7 the bus would come until almost 9 and she wouldnt pick her up from 1 to 4 hours after Bri was off the bus. And she would get mad when I call her to come pick Bri up. She has never once  thanked me and that really pisses me off.
So my husband told bri mom that she would have to find someone else to do it. She got so pissed that she called my mother in law and her boyfriend bitching about me and what a ***** i am because i wont get bri on and off the bus. So I called her and needless to say it wasnt pretty.

So I am wrong for her to take care of bri on the weeks that she has her................please let me know

[rebbecca]

They were never married and Bri doesnt even remember them together. Me and her dad have been together for 4 years so its not like all of this just happened. And I dont have a problem with being a stepmom to bri. the damn problem is her mom wants everyone else to take care of her but for her to still keep joint custody.

[Agiesmom]

Oh, please...please focus on the child and what's best for her.  Yes, what would be best is to have her mom more involved--no, scratch that...what would be best is if her parents had gotten along and not divorced and she didn't have all this new family dynamic stuff to deal with, but you can't change that.  And you can't change the fact that her mother isn't doing the right thing by her.  It's up to you to step up to the plate.  Like it or not, it's your obligation.  When you marry a man with a child, it's a package deal.  Surely you knew that.

I totally agree with RockRose.  She obviously struck a nerve, but she said nothing that was untrue.

Focus on the child.  The adults just have to deal with it and make it right for her.  She's an innocent party here--didn't ask to be born, didn't ask for her mother, didn't ask for two homes to be bounced back and forth between--she didn't ask for any of it. If one of the three adults in this situation isn't doing what's right, the other ones have to make up for it.

[here4theinfo]

Hi here is the keyword here , its not quite a forum,  just a post in this section, the page its on is page 1 still, there is a lady that is a therapist and she says she would like to help out too..Ok, sorry your having so much drama..heres the keyword..My step parent section..

[rebbecca]

JUst to let you and everyone else know...... Bri has never ever been left by the bus stop by herself. I dont know where that came from but to just make that clear that has never happened. She is with me when she was getting on the bus at my house from 7 until 9 in the morning and from 4 until her mom decided to come get Bri.

[rebbecca]

I never said that I wanted a damn golden star. I am a mom and a stepmom and I do the best I can do for all of them. My husband is dealing with this just like I am. I wrote about this not him. I got in the agruement with Bri's mom not him and I wanted some feed back about the subject. And they each have custody of Bri so no I will not have Bri full time when her mom is sitting around with her thumb up her ***. I am sorry but this is how I feel.  

[rebbecca]

I just want to thank you for what u typed. Please let me know when you do start the stepmom forum. Because this is ********, I want someone to talk to about this not be bicthed at. Thank you again here4theinfo