Toddler not following requests

[zepeda]

I'm having trouble putting my 4 year old daughter to bed.  I am a divorced mom and been sharing room with her (not bed) for almost 2 years.  Just recently i got re-married and moved into a bigger house with my new husband and she got a huge new bedroom for her own.  Everynight is a big fight with her to stay at her room though out the night.  She attends daycare for 9hrs a day and her teacher always prays her for being so well behaved and her "helper" , but with me it seems that she is totally out of control: throwing tantrums for anything that doesnt go her way: from bed time to dressing up.  Could it be that she is "controlling me"? help please.

[margypops]

9hours a day at daycare is a long time in my opinion and it is possible that she needs more time with you,maybe cut back so you have more time with her. Do they put them for a nap at daycare as that could also be a reason she isnt tired enough at night. . It is also possible that having spent 2 years in the same room as you she feels usurped by her new step dad , how does she get on with him , maybe have him connect with hermore  fun, games reading stories, , attention .When she does get up in the night, quietly, no yelling, take her back into her room , if she isnt tired let her read for a while ,if you are consistant she will get it and realise that she has to sleep in her own room. good luck