Query Depression/OCD/Anxiety ??

[snuffy2011]

I think I am suffering from some type of disorder, bipolar runs in my family but I dont think it is that, I am extremely anxious, worry constantly and work myslef up over nothing I get in real bad moods when I get stressed and I get stressed quite easily, today I was trying to pack up after a weekend a way and could'nt watch my 3 year old and pack and asked my 11 year old to watch him, an hour later she was still lying in bed and I was screaming at her telling her she was lazy, I felt so bad afterwards and wanted to cry and felt like an unfit mother and was thinking my kids would be better off without me not that I would commit suicide I would'nt be that selfish. I just cant help and lose it and get extremly panicked that something bad will happen. I also compulsively wash my hands a million times a day until they are raw and wont touch handles of doors etc and check doors and plugs non stop even when I know they are closed/off, I get the kids to treble check. I have spoke to my dr on several occasions and he ignores me, he gave me Johns wort once but didnt find any difference. I dont want to be like this, I dont want to be moody and get annoyed for nothing, I want to be normal but dont want to take medication, I tried conselling a year ago but felt it made me worse as I had a very bad childhood and it brought a lot of it back, at my wits end, dont know what to don, any advice would be appreciated. Thanks

[hompradhan736]

I am a depressive man since last 24 years. In the first 3/4 years  I am suffered much to  the extent  deep feeling of suicide. But later on after clinical treatment  I am get better. Till date am consulting doctor and taking medicine in the contrary that initially doctor advised me that after taking medicine for about six months will be cured. Please suggest me.  

[snuffy2011]

Bubulous, thank you very much for your kind reply, I will definitely try the things you mentioned. I hope you are feeling better now and healing. Maybe I should try a different counsellor, I had been using one that was not fully qualified as it was cheaper but maybe it's time for a proper counsellor

[Bubulous]

During my recent 45 day stay in a mental hospital, a lot of my past was brought up too.  It wasn't fun or easy but it was necessary.  If you are looking for help you will find it through counseling.  If you are looking for a diagnosis it is also waiting for you in counseling.

If you are looking for happiness I will tell you this:

First off be careful of diagnosing yourself.   You may have a chemical imbalance but don't read too much into it.  For me, I had to do a lot of things to recover.  I had to do CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), counseling and medicine.  If you wish to do this without medicine try these things.....

Work on your mind, body, and spirit.  Start with your mind and body.  Eat healthy, exercise, do yoga, cardio (however little).  Eat 4-5 small meals a day.  This will help your body.

Read a lot.  Journal your thoughts and feelings every morning.  Put on paper the things that affected you the day before and write down how those things, in fact, affected you.  Journal about your childhood and tell it to someone you trust.  That is why it is better to have a counseler.  Unresolved problems do no tgo away, they worsen.  Good Luck