Suppressed Memory agony

[Allie560711]

I can't remember anything about second grade. I know all my teachers from kindergarten on but second grade is a complete blank. I also have feelings of sex being dirty so much so that I can't kiss or hug my boyfriend without feeling disgust and that I'm dirty. I remember a dream I had and have had from time to time about a custodian in school telling me to sit down on the steps of my apartment building with him. I started having these dreams in 4th grade. I need help. I plan to get married. But do not want to carry this into my marriage.I need help.

[freddie8605]

I know its scary seeing a psychologist or talking to someone you don't know or even know about the personal things we have gone through. I am sorry you have gone through tough times especially when you were young. but this is not your fault and i really hope you get help from a professional so that you can get past this. i know it is easy for me to say but please don't feel humiliated. The psychologist is trained about these things and will  know the techniques to be able to help you. I do have to say from personal experiences you are best to find a person who you can trust and feel 100% comfortable  around but finding someone, sometimes takes a bit of time.

I really hope you all the best.

[Allie560711]

Thank you for the advice. Its just a bit scary for me. This is anonymous but to sit face to face with someone would be humiliating. But in any case thank you and God Bless

[freddie8605]

I would seriously think about seeing a psychologist. they will be able to uncover  the repressed memories, and discover what might be there. they will be able support you through everything and help make you feel better.

best of luck