Because alcohol is suppose to make you feel like that. Like the above user said, it IS a depressant. Most people don't feel it because when people are normal their levels go down a notch and they get over it or don't even feel it, but depressed people and alcohol don't mix because that notch the Alcohol brings down can be a serious threat to you and your health.
I suggest that you take part in dryfest , it is a thing that is happening this January,what you need to try and do is not drink for the whole month. It is Set up for alcoholics but I feel as though this could benefit you greatly. Take some time without alcohol and see if you still feel the same way about things, if you do still feel suicidal and depressed , I suggest that you talk to friends and family about your problem, I find that the more people you tell and the more you talk about it the more you yourself can accept it and start to deal with it. If you feel as though you can't talk to the people around you then phone a hotline or even better seek professional help, don't be afraid to admit that you need it. Please mail me if you need it , at anytime , I WILL be there for you whenever you need it , I will listen and give advice and suggestions =) x
it is a depressant its going to make u feel worse how r u when ur not drinking? it u dont feel that way the awnser is easy if not pleade get help for u ur family and ur friends. they would hurt so much without u. start the new year off right get help