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[moodybieber]

Okay so I'm a 14 year old girl and I'm confused... I have a great life, great family, good grades and amazing friends but for the last few months I've been miserable. A few weeks ago it was too much, all the pain... and I cut. it relieved me and made me happy for the time and I continued since then because i want to feel that way always. I don't understand why I feel this way. I feel ugly and fat and worthless and everytime I'm around other people I want to cry because I feel like they're all judging me. I hate being near other people. I've never felt this way and I just want to know that someone else knows why I'm feeling this and if they feel the same? I don't know what to do and I refuse to tell my friends or mom because I don't want to let them down like I usually do. I need some reassurance.

[SMcGregor]

You may feel no laughter or joy inside because these positive emotions have been blocked by unhappy memories. Old emotional hurts inevitably lurk inside and when the new feelings try to bubble up they are filtered through these hurts. When our lives are not going well, we feel down or depressed.  This is nature’s way of telling us to make some changes.

In order to feel good, heres's must present in our lives.
- good nutrition
- fresh air
- sunshine
- physical activity
- purposeful activity
- good relationships
- adequate and regular sleep”

[Crystal413]

I'm so sorry your in such pain. You would not be letting your mom down by sharing with her how you are feeling. She would want to help you. She would want to know how much her little girl is in pain. Sometimes we just can't do things alone and need to reach out. Keeping your feelings locked inside your head only makes things worse. I think that is why you decided to cut, thinking that somehow it would release some of your pain. You probably have discovered though that by doing that, it is short lived and your pain is still there. Once people use cutting as a way to cope it is very hard to stop. This is really serious. Do you write in a journal? This helps many people with their feelings. It is even a good release for many people, just writing down their feelings and what's going on in their  mind. If you don't write in a journal, give it a try.  I think it would also be helpful to not only talk to your mom but to ask your mom to make an appointment for you to see a Therapist. In these types of situations talking to a Therapist can really help. You want a good fit with a Therapist, someone who you feel comfortable with and can open up to. Sometimes the first one you try will be a good fit, other times it won't and then you just try someone else. Don't give up.  I believe you will feel better once you start opening up and you can get to the route of the problem with help. Please don't try to do this alone. You have such a bright future ahead of you, you need to reach for it. It's alot easier to get there with help? Your not alone. Many many people go through tough times and many struggles. Asking for help is the best thing you can do for yourself so that you can feel better and move on as a happy person, full of life and dreams. We are here to help you too. Keep in touch, Sincerely, Crystal