Type 1 diabetes and suffering from depression

[qmchugh]

Hello,
I am a 29 year old female, diagnosed with Type I diabetes when I was 25. I was always a picture of health and never had any "health" problems until now. Not to make excuses or anything, but knowing that I have this to deal with this has made me extremely depressed, so depressed that at times I don't take my insulin and I also think that in my mind I'm afraid of being over weight. It didn't help that my mother passed  away suddenly either. It seems like whenever I get into a funk I am not following my regimen. It's like I just don't care anymore. I'm just really down and have no idea what to do. I know I need to get help...just don't know where I need to go. Do you recommend anyone in the immediate chicago area?

[aunt maureen]

anyone  else    going  through   this     would  like  to know

[JDRF-VOL-SG]

Many diabetics seem to lose their ability to stay on top of the glucose levels when depressed, for it takes a lot of constant work, and we just wear down. From the folks who have written to us, it seems that many people also sort of go into a denial phase -- they stop testing and taking insulin and hope that what they don't know won't hurt them. If you could only read the e-mails that come in from folks who have suddenly suffered kidney failure or who have diabetic cataracts or whose digestive systems have stopped working due to nerve damage, you would never do this again. These people who suffer complications tell us that they would do anything to be able to turn back the clock and have a second chance to take tight control over those glucose numbers and protect themselves. But once the damage is done, there is no going back.

Now, you are aware of this or you wouldn't be writing to us. I do hope we can help you. First, know that you are not alone. Many diabetics write in to tell us that they are depressed. This is a disease that makes us walk a tightrope that we can never get off of, and we can't ever even take a break. It can be overwhelming. And when we mess up, we feel guilty. Living with constant guilt over the 'bad' numbers is hard to deal with.

I sympathize, for I walk the same tightrope. I want to suggest that we get you in touch with the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation's Online Diabetic Support Team for some one-on-one encouragement. Go to the website www.jdrf.org and click on the link on the left side of the page for the Online Diabetic Support Team (ODST). This will bring you to a window where you can answer some questions so we can best match you up with one of our volunteers, and you will hear from someone within a couple of days. That person can be a shoulder to cry on, and can encourage you and challenge you to do what you know you need to do to stay healthy.

As for fearing that you will gain weight if you take insulin, this is NOT true. I am slim as a rail and have excellent control -- I take my insulin and never gain an ounce. The trick is to make sure that you are not eating more calories than your body needs while taking the appropriate amount of insulin. If your control has been bad, your body may be using up its own fat reserves because you are in ketoacidosis, and taking insulin will stop that from happening. But if you are eating the correct amount of calories, you will not gain more weight than you are supposed to. Some people do find that they need to cut back on calories some when their glucose levels are finally under control, but there are many ways to do that without sacrificing good glucose levels.

Part of the depression may be due to having out-of-whack glucose levels, so if you can get the glucose levels under control, you may find that your depression lifts some just because the chemicals in your brain are more normal.

But it does sound like you need to have some professional help with the depression -- I wish I could recommend someone in the Chicago area, but we can't make recommendations online. We can only try to connect you to the Chicago chapter of JDRF that is closest to you and hope that you can talk to someone who lives there and get personal recommendations from folks in the local area. This can be done by asking to be connected to the nearest local chapter when you send in your request to the ODST on the website. I really think thisis going to be the best help you can get. Furthermore, you may find some encouragement in meeting other type 1 diabetic people in your area and knowing that you are not alone in this.

Many parents of type 1 children notice that their kids are irritable or depressed when their glucose levels are out of whack, so part of your problem may actually be that your glucose is not under control. Which makes you go into guilty denial and not take your insulin, which makes the glucose levels go even more out of control. It seems that you need to take some 'baby steps' to just start one improvement at a time. Do contact the ODST and they will put you in touch with a caring volunteer who will e-mail with you and will walk you through getting your health back under control. We all understand these feelings and have been in your shoes. And we care about you. Do let us help you. I hope we hear from you soon.