OK, I just want see if anyone else is going through what I am. First off my name is Steven Baker and I am 25 years old.
I think that I am having Erectile Dysfunction for a few reasons I think a problem I have is because my spine use to look like an s, and it got moved around to look normal, and also because of some meds.
I have been on some strong depression meds after my Girlfriend who was going to be my wife was killed, and it had that side affect. Also I have been looking at porn when the internet came around and masturbating a lot all of the time like 5 time a day ( I know that's sad) Ok here we go, I hope that I'm not the only one, and I just hate talking about this.
I remember I never use to have ed or have any problems in my life. I remember a one night stand that I had with this college girl, when I started high school I stayed hard for a few hours. And I was able to come a lot.
I would just get turned on by talking with my late GF and had no problems with her.
But like I said I had to be on some meds after she was killed. 3 years after that happened I started talking to this beautiful women who I loved. Still do. We would kiss ect I would get hard. I stayed that way by touching her kissing her ect a lot. But then the side affect of the meds, porn MB ect kicked in. I would go soft, I would *** way to fast(I use to stay hard and would be able to keep going) but all of that went away and I would go limp. When I put a condom on I would go limp and that never happened before. I know she had to feel like ****, I know I did. I told her about the meds, but she thought it was because of her (which broke my heart) And after we broke up (which she didn't break up with me. I broke up with her because I thought that this problem would never go away, and I thought I would keep making her feel like she couldn't turn me on. Which she did) So after some time I started looking up porn again and MB a lot, and I mean a lot all of the time.
A few days ago I wouldn't get hard all of the way by watching porn. Is it because of me looking at porn all of the time, and MB all of the time, the meds? Or because its still on my mind? I am scared to start dating again, because I don't want this problem to happen again.
This makes me feel like worthless, it makes me feel like I won't be able to please a women ever again. And that just makes me feel like ****, because I want to date again have a great sex life and have a family. But should I stop thinking about that because this problem will never go away? Or is all of that just in my mind?
I want to be what I use to be like, I would get horny just thinking about a women I liked, thinking about her naked, us having fun.
I just wish that I never found out about porn it has fd me over, and I just want to go back to the way I use to be.
Maybe I should just give up and just realize that this problem will never go away. Maybe I'm just worthless now.
I just want to say sorry I know this post ***** and the way I typed it out, the way I word it. It's just that I'm not comfortable talking about this.