ivf buddy thread: ms320, fifi, miky, magda, fyrefly

[Helen72]

I thought I will start a thread for ivf gals to stay in touch and share the news.  Cheerleaders welcome!

I have my baseline u/s tomorrow and hope to start FSH tomorrow as well although 7+ weeks of b/c are screwing with my body and after spotting for about 4 weeks while on b/c now AF is not really starting so I don't know what my doc will say...

I know that most of you guys are at different stages of the ivf process.  I hope to summarize what I remember.

Miky72 -  b/c. IVF for May.
Magda_s -  2ww with 3 super embryos wanting to implant.  When is your beta?
Mary (ms320) - FSH injections.  Any good news on your end?    
fifi - RE appt 22nd April.
fyrefly: in limbo between retrieval and transfer; right now transfer is set for Friday.  
Heather - Perinatologist appt April 30th
Dee - TWW, beta Monday
Lisa - hiatus

Since I have not heard from many of you I am hoping for an update.  Just trying to get in touch and stay in touch with all of you in the same boat.

[sasparilla]

Hi Ladies,
Magda.. glad youre feelin more upbeat, and so happy to hear I could make ya laugh.

Lisa.. Since Im pretty new here.. just wondering if youre doing donor? I know I would, in a hippity happity heartbeat.  ( Maybe thats another reason why good old DH is workin so hard)

Hi Dee.. I dont really think we've met, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE Australia.. went there about 10 years ago for 2 months.. almost moved to Coffs Harbour.

Helen.. How are those follies growin, girl?

And to everyone else.. Waddup???

I really dont know why Im bein silly today.. must be the weather.. or maybe since I had a dream about getting pregnant last night it put me in good spirits.  Its my first "Im pregnant" dream ever.. in my entire life!  There was tiny little sprite of a girl that was soo cute and she told me that the eggs Im making right now will make me pregnant.  What a happy dream!

Besides that I pretty much feel like projectile vomiting because of the ovulation pains that are starting.  Sheesh.. What I wouldnt give to ovulate and not feel it.  But, to count my blessings, Im glad I do ovulate every month, like clockwork (albeit, painful clockwork).  
DH had a funeral to go to today and then to work, so yes, I gave myself my HCG trigger in the butt.  Giant needle, huge shot... shakin the whole time.. thinking, damn this really isnt nearly as easy as the belly shots.  Luckily I had a HUGE target to aim at.. can't really miss a size 12 white as the moon a*s*s*  can you? Hey.. thats one good thing about gaining 30 lbs.. my butt is so big the shot was much easier  :0
Just got to grin and bear it  :)

Hope everyone is having a great day!!!!!  Me and my giant a*s*s* are wishing you all baby dustings and happy thoughts for today!

[ms320]

Helen -Just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you and your u/s today.  Hope the results are positive.

Lisa:  Sorry to hear you are a bit down.  It is very hard when you see the people around you getting from life the thing(s) you really desire.  When it happens to me I often wonder why others are so blessed while I am consistently cursed.  I often wonder if I committed some dreadful sin at some time in my life and I am now being punished.  If you can do something to pamper yourself, maybe that will make you feel better.  By the way, what a testament to your character that you have invited one of the newly engaged women for a celebratory dinner.  You are a much better and much stronger person than I am.

Fiona:  Just wondering how things went with your new RE.  

Heather: So glad to see you posting and feeling better.  I think the day of beauty thing is a great idea.  You soooo deserve it.  

[magda_s]

They *** the word "come"???  Oh that's ridiculous!  Oooh... okay... a bit slow on the uptake.  Yes, I can see why with the different spelling they might have *** it.  Although still.  

And Lisa, I fully understand missing a DH and feeling the weight of it when you get a double announcement like that.  I think about you a lot in fact and admire you immeasurably for doing this on your own... we all complain and b i t c h  and all that but we have someone we're doing this WITH.  Even if we don't often feel they have a friggin clue!!  I really do admire you for it Lisa.  don't sell yourself short though... talking about not having thought about it 10 years ago or whatever... I'm sure that if you'd met someone wrothwhile then you'd have married them.  But you didn't.  Look at it this way, aren't you wa-a-ay better off being on your own than being married to someone you never should have been with in the first place??
Sure you're going to have your moments of feeling a bit down about but really, we've all got moments like that.  I love my DH with all my heart but it scares me that there's a 20 year age difference.  This will sound very calculated but... assuming that we live full lives, I'm going to have to be without him for a long long time.  And yes, sometimes I wonder if I wonder if I wouldn't have been better off with someone younger but the fact is I didn't fall in love with someone younger!
Chin up Lisa, you're a wonderful person... you just have to find someone deserving of you.

Well, AF must really have been banging on the door because she showed up this morning after skipping only one dose of progesterone!!!  Basically, as soon as the door opened a crack, she slipped in!

[babyalive]

Fiona,  I forgot to address your comment earlier about aging.  Let me just say I KNOW!  I felt and feel the very same way.  Turning 40 was like an awakening of OMG the time just flies!  What happened to it?  Why didn't I think about marriage(in my case) and babies a decade ago.  When you're younger you just sort of think that day of being 40 somehow never really comes.  But, boy does it come!  Now I'm looking ahead and thinking I'll be 62 before I know it and where will the time of gone?  Will I still be single and childless.  Oh I hope life changes for me drastically in the next 20 years!   I will update the b-day chart and I'll start twirling and shaking my pom poms for Fiona's bfp at 40.

Magda,  I'm glad your slowly coming out of the funk that bfn delivers.  It really does seem that nothing is standing in your way of bfp.  So, it HAS to work soon for you.  It just HAS to!  They *** out the word come, but the little boy spelled it differently.  I didn't think about the fact that medhelp would *** it.

Well, I'm still optimistic and cheering for us all.  But, feel a bit like I have a double whammy this week.  Because as you all know, I am missing a dh in my life and so would like to have one as well as a baby.  Well we had a staff meeting at work yesterday and we had an announcement of 2 engagements.  2 teachers I've been working with for 3 years each, they've each been single most of the 3 years but recentely met their now fiances. Well BOTH of them got engaged over the weekend.  They are also both almost 20 years younger than I.  It feels for a me bit the same way it feels when we get our bfn's on the same day that 2 coworkers or friends(excluding friends here of course!) tell us they got a bfp.  I am good friends with one of them and am VERY, VERY happy for her.  I'm having her over to my house tonight for a celebratory dinner, dessert and wine.  But, there is a part of me that is just heartbroken for myself.   Just needed to share that with someone.  

Okay.  Back to living life to the fullest.  Off to walk dear Sparky and get ready for work.  
Lisa

[magda_s]

k... a new day... a new outlook!
I still feel mildly in shock or... more like I'm missing something... which I guess I am really!!! However, I have left over cheesecake for breakfast and tomorrow I start trying to lose the extra weight I've gained from all this.  If I'm really lucky, I'll lose a bit more to make up for the weight I will gain next time!!!  That's the plan, anyway.

Helen, thank you for your note... it's been so long since I've read it that for  mili-second I thought, "Who on earth is Dagny? I *know* that name... "  
I never ended up reading Atlas Shrugged again like I said I would.  I got distracted by a little book I found on my shelf called "A Long Way Down" by Nick Hornby.  An excellent little book that helped get me through yesterday.
So, is it your next u/s tomorrow??  Perhaps today now... Good luck.  I hope those follies are getting themselves in order!

Sally, thanks for making me laugh... you got me at, '...the expense of IVF [driving DH] into a sexual frenzy'!

Heather, thank you... I'm not so sure how much grace I've handled this with what with my constant whinging but, even if I say so myself, I'm amazed, once I knew for sure, how I've managed to handle it.  In fact, I will even say that yes, I handled it with grace once I knew.  Don't think there was that much grace involved in the lead up!  
However, I have prayed and prayed that if this cycle didn't work, that I would have the stength to accept it and the courage to try again and it looks like someone was listening.  Although, really, I don't think the 'courage' bit was all that necessary... I think it's more a matter of bloody-mindedness!!!!!!
Anyway, enjoy your "beauty-treatment" day... you deserve it in a huge way.  You should go get everything done at a nice spa somewhere.  Go spend a day there.  There's a great one about an hour from where my mum lives and every time my sister and I are back there together, we go and spend the day.  As soon as you're in your bathrobe and they hand you your glass of champagne, you feel transported!

Dee!  I've missed you!  Hope you're doing okay despite being surrounded by in-laws while feeling all hormonal and dealing with AF to boot!
Thank you for your support.  I wonder if I learned from you in dealing with this BFN!

Mary, when is your teleconferencing call?? It's today or tomorrow, right?  Well, anyway, good luck... I hope you get something good out of it.

Fiona, where are you at?
Helen?  Dee?  Maybe we could do with another update??  I'm officially on sabatical.  Lisa?  How would you put it?  I've joined you in the bunker to work on strategical tactics?

Lisa, the cards were TOO cute.  But I'm very curious to know what the little boy said that got blanked out!!!  "...but you will *** back"???  Maybe I'm slow but I don't see what it could be!  Dying of curiosity.

k... off to start my day.  Have a good one yourselves ladies.

[empty]

well it could be worse - they could be calling you 'dawg'