Has my husband a need to worry?!

[theworriedwife]

Oh where to starts ladies & gents... Me & my husband have been happily married for some time now, but had a few difficulties about 3 weeks ago to which we momentarily split up! We soon sorted things, got back to ourselves regained the love and passion (sexually too) and were back to our normal relationship. However my husband came down with flu like symptoms 10 days ago, had a temperature of 102 farenheit so visited the hospital where they took multiple tests to find nothing wrong & sent him away the next day with paracetomol etc. That was when my world got hit by a bulldozer and he admitted to a brief sexual encounter with a girl one evening when we had had our issues a few weeks back, and that although it had been protected vaginal sex the durex did slip of to where they carried on for a very short period. She has also given him oral sex. (ouch writing this hurts)! He is now terriified after feeling so ill, high temp, aching, sweating & headache that he  may have contracted HIV from this girl! And clearly we are terrified in case he has passed it to me, which then also my baby could be at risk! I love him and we have decided to tryand work through this which i really hope we can but i have a few questions to ask people - to reassure a very worried, emotional and upset mind!

1) Can it be possible to experience symptoms about a week after the unprotected vaginal sex? The symptoms experienced were: Headache, very high temp, aching and generally feeling unwell. Symptoms NOT experienced - diarrohea, sickness, swollen glands.

2) After the symptoms above lasting 3 or 4 days he is feeling slightly better but left with a hacking cough - has fits where he cannot talk barely due to this. Is this a normal sign of HIV in the acute stage?

3) We have visited the clinics - he is to be tested after 3months of the incident, I have had bloods taken to check for my status & also have to be retested after 6 months. My partner has also ordered a home testing kit. What are the chances in your opinions of it coming back with a positive or negative result? (obviously know its an opinion and will take it all with a pinch of salt.

As i'm sure you'll understand this is a very emotional, anxious and worrying time for not only me but my partner. I am having to deal with feelings of hurt, betrayal (although we hadnt been together as such that weekend), anger, devastation and all the other feelings you can imagine a possible HIV suspect or their wife and family to worry about.

I would be grateful for anyones input & just hope with all my heart these next 3 months fly by for us, we can get through this together as a family and it will only make us stronger! And of course i hope with all my heart that my husband and i both are cleared of HIV and are both negative os our future together can become certain and worry free of this.

Thanks in advance!

[worry376]

There is very very less chance that he got HIV from this encounter. I have read in this forum that ars symptoms can be caused by anxiety alone.
According to modern testing techniques 6-8 weeks are very accurate. It will bring  you some peace of mind. Obviously am not an expert and these are just my opinions. Try asking the experts or doctors in this forum.

[stressedup]

for now all u can do is not worry and just wait 3 month for the results, but if u can find this girl to get tested, please do so. please get her tested, for your own peace of mind. But it is probably nothing.

[theworriedwife]

It was a very brief thing apparently. i cant bring my self to ask too many questions - but she gave him oral sex unprotected, but it was for a short time, they had protected sex until the durex slipped off to which he put his penis back in for few minutes and then came outside of her! He has tried to contact her since but didnt know her name or have a number for her - and only has the number of a friend of hers she used his phone to call. But he says from what he knows of her she goes round to his to smoke the odd pipe (yeh great one so she's a druggy!) but doesnt inject apparently... and he thinks she's totally clean! Aah its such a worry! please anyone does this sound like a positive case or could we be worrying. its affecting me big time, i cant sleep and just feel hurt. find it hard to be with him but love him and want to work through it so i have to bear these emotions! Just want the next 3months and negative results to come quickly!!!

[stressedup]

was the sex with the girl, protected or unprotected, if it was protected, u have really nothing to worry about, and neither does your hubby, if it was unprotected, can u get that girl he had a fling with tested, if u can, do it anyway, this will most likely put your mind at ease.