rape?

[blueduy]

Hello everyone. I'm extremely worried over something that happened on Sunday.

I'm a male (bi), 21 years old and very inexperienced with gay sex.

So, In July I met a guy on the internet(sigh) and I finally decided to meet him on Sunday.  After dinner we were in his car and decided to have sex.  It was my first time being anally penetrated and he was big.  (sorry, im so nervos I don't even know how to say this properly) And as soon as he went in, I felt so much pain that I tried to get away and he told me, get on your side and it'll be better, so I did but again, the pain when he started penetrating me was too mch and i tried to push him away, but I couldn't because a) I was in a very bad position b) I was in terrible pain c) he was stronger.  So I was crying and beggin him to stop but he wouldn't.  I was finally able to kick him and he let go. When i sat up, I saw the condom was gone! It had slipped off when we got on our side and he had been penetrating me without it.  I thought I was inside me, and i tried to see if it was there but it wasn't. I saw a little blood on my fingers, then I noticed that the condom was on the floor of the car.  

I was really mad and got out of his car and walked home.  Later on I began to be very worried, so I called him and begged him to tell me about his sexual activities.  He confessed that he has guys whom he has regular sex and sometimes he has sex with people he meets off the internet. He says that the last time he got tested was about a year and a hald and he's never had an STD.  

I know that my risk is estremely big because a) a it was condomless b) I bled so there was a lot of contact between his fluids and mine c) it's been a long time since he got tested d) he has a lot of unprotected sex

I'm dead worried! He says he feels fine, and he thinks he's clean.  But I feel so anxious!!!! I've had suicide thoughts.  I don't know if I'm going to be able to wait three months!.

Anyway, here are my questions:
1) would this be considered rape? I did consent to having sex in the first place, but then I didn't want it anymore!
2) When's the earliest I can get tested?  I don't think I can wait three months and I heard that most people will test positive after 25 days if they're infected -is this true?
3)Can I take another test besides ELIZA? I was reading that you can take an RNA test wich can be taken only after two weeks of exposure.  Is this true? and if so, where can I find a place that offers this type of test in California? Is it costly?
4)What's the earliest I can test for other STDs?
5) Do the facts that: he's older(37), he's rich, white and didn't come inside of me reduce the chances of me getting HIV? I know this is a stupid question, but I read somewhere that these reduce your risk.

I would really appreciate if you guys helped me with this.  I'm so worried...Im constantly having mental break downs and emotional melt downs.  Im a disaster since then. I haven't slept, eaten, ...i just need help... please everyone, help me!!!!!

[joggen]

At 4 weeks the antibody test is about 90% accurate. There is really no point in testing earlier. A negative result at 4 weeks would be encouraging and would lower the chance that you were infected significantly. However, there is still a slight chance that the result could change on subsequent tests. At six weeks, you should expect a negative result to remain negative. A rapid test would be just as accurate as a regular ELISA, with a somewhat higher chance of a false positive.

Going back to school might actually be good for you, if it keeps you off the subject of HIV.

[blueduy]

oh, i forgot the update: two days ago i began feeling these cold like simptoms...its weird, because i never get sick, and when i do...oh boy, i get SO sick...but this is different, i have mild simptoms...its not keeping me from doing my daily chores...but its annoying.  i know the cold is goinng around and that no symptoms are good hiv infectiion indicators...but the "mild" cold surely is the most popular simptom....  *sigh*  :(

[blueduy]

Hey joggen, no i am completely lost on how to do that. ive done extensive research but nothing comes up.  I've called clinics and std centers and no one seems to provide that.  So I decided to wait...

I have a question, should I take an elisa test at day 25 and be confident that my 6 weeks and three month tests will come out with the same result?

I know that by week 6th you should get a pretty accurate picture of you hiv status...but honestly, there's days in which the 'not knowing' overwhelms me! i can't go back to my normal life without knowing...school is starting in two weeks and im afraid i wont'  be able to do well in this state.  my 25 day mark is on the 10 of this month, right before going back to school.  

so: How accurate would my test be at the 25 day mark?
and, would the rapid test would work just as well as the elisa at the 25 mark?  

I'm sorry i write a whole book everytime i come here...

Thanks for your help Joggen  ;)

[joggen]

Have you looked into having an RNA test?

[blueduy]

Thanks Joggen for tha last recomendation.  I will definitely see a doctor.

Ok. On to an update:  Well, there really is nothing new to talk about.  Up until today I was fine and I wasn't having panic attacts.  But today I read  an article of a guy who got infected at 21 'cause he was addicted to bathouses, cocaine and meth.  It got me really scared.  Now, I am getting back to being scared and feeling this thing in my gut.  I really really Cant wait for Wednesday February, 10th...that's going to be the 25th day day of my exposure.  I am really just waiting for the doc. to tell me: You tested positive.  UGH!!! this is such a horrible thing!  I am not sure I'll survive until then!!!!
Sorry to come here and say these things...it's just that no one knows that I'm going through this....  

[joggen]

No symptoms are a good indication of HIV infection, including yeast infections. See your doctor if you are concerned about whatever is going on (which is NOT a STD).