Aa
Out of my mind with anxiety... unneccessarily?
OK, so last Saturday, I had protected sex with a prostitute. Now I am deathly afraid I may have contracted HIV. I've read the other threads- no worries if I used protection. I also figure even if the condom broke, this was my only encouter of this kind, and according to this Columbia University handbook (http://www.health.columbia.edu/pdfs/hiv_handbook.pdf) (pg 29) there is virtually no chance in contracting it from a single contact- and those stats are when the woman is definitely positive (who knows she is), and I assume unprotected.
But it's only been 5 days and I'm losing tons of sleep, getting diarrhea from my stress related IBS, and can barely eat. Any advice on how to handle the stress as I sit through 3 months to get tested, including the probable occurrence of ARS-like symptoms that are probably just stress related, but will still freak me out?
Also, are there any other time intervals for getting tested that might ease my mind, like say after 2 weeks, 6 weeks, 10 weeks etc?
The worst part is I feel this is so low risk that I shouldn't bother holding back sex from my fiance (who will call off the wedding if she learns of my infidelity, which will inform everyone I know of my predicament) but at the same time I get nauseas thinking about the chance of me being that 1 in 10,000 anomaly and infecting her.
Help!
But it's only been 5 days and I'm losing tons of sleep, getting diarrhea from my stress related IBS, and can barely eat. Any advice on how to handle the stress as I sit through 3 months to get tested, including the probable occurrence of ARS-like symptoms that are probably just stress related, but will still freak me out?
Also, are there any other time intervals for getting tested that might ease my mind, like say after 2 weeks, 6 weeks, 10 weeks etc?
The worst part is I feel this is so low risk that I shouldn't bother holding back sex from my fiance (who will call off the wedding if she learns of my infidelity, which will inform everyone I know of my predicament) but at the same time I get nauseas thinking about the chance of me being that 1 in 10,000 anomaly and infecting her.
Help!
MOVE ON. He didn't have a risk and oral sex is not a risk of contracting HIV.
...the post in the doctor's forum I referred to above was from subzero32 and began on June 16th.
Oh...and cunnilingus is not a risk for HIV. I challenge you to find a reputable source that says it is.
I'll leave this alone now, but there are enough scared people in this forum already without someone needlessly fanning the flames of their anxiety.
Oh...and cunnilingus is not a risk for HIV. I challenge you to find a reputable source that says it is.
I'll leave this alone now, but there are enough scared people in this forum already without someone needlessly fanning the flames of their anxiety.
A female perspective? What a load of garbage. That's an insult to Lizzie, Nursegirl and all of the women on this forum that provide competent, educated risk analysis.
And you bet Snippet knows something you don't. He knows how HIV is or isn't transmitted. Go look in the doctor's forum. Dr. Handsfield just advised someone whose "risks" were protected sex with a CSW and unprotected oral that his real-world odds of having contracted HIV were about 1 in 20 million. ONE IN TWENTY MILLION. Then, he advised the man that he didn't require testing. Why don't you get on that forum and tell the good doctor that you "can't believe" he didn't recommend testing. And then ask him if he thinks he knows something you don't...
And you bet Snippet knows something you don't. He knows how HIV is or isn't transmitted. Go look in the doctor's forum. Dr. Handsfield just advised someone whose "risks" were protected sex with a CSW and unprotected oral that his real-world odds of having contracted HIV were about 1 in 20 million. ONE IN TWENTY MILLION. Then, he advised the man that he didn't require testing. Why don't you get on that forum and tell the good doctor that you "can't believe" he didn't recommend testing. And then ask him if he thinks he knows something you don't...
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Ok, you win this case :)
Unneccessarily_scared, I also think you are okay. You can get tested just for the piece of mind.
How about NOT. If you're having protected sex, you don't need HIV testing.
How about this :
Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.
the poster was not at risk of contracting hiv. a condom used consistently and correctly protects against hiv. there is no need to test PERIOD!!!!
dont be giving advice when you dont know what you are talking about. giving incorrect information can send someone off the deep end. we stick to facts...not our opinions.
dont be giving advice when you dont know what you are talking about. giving incorrect information can send someone off the deep end. we stick to facts...not our opinions.
Yea...But not 100x. End of story.
True. But some people do get struck by lightning. :(
Theoretically you might get hit by lightning 100x today. Don't be a moron. Protected sex is not a risk for HIV. End of story.
NOTHING other than your own hand masturbating yourself is 100% safe. Anytime you have sex with someone else there is theoretically some risk for transmission.
Of course I don't recommend he doesn't get tested and neither will anyone else here who actually knows about how HIV is transmitted. To recommend testing is foolish and irresponsible.
There was zero risk in this situation. His wife is not at risk and neither was he. End of story.
There was zero risk in this situation. His wife is not at risk and neither was he. End of story.
I can't believe you won't recommend he get tested. Yes, we agree that he was a respectful cheater and used protection. That was nice. Although I believe that condoms have decreased his risk, there is still a risk that exists. Additionally, we did not ask about (1) him performing oral on her with protection (e.g., dental dam) and (2) her performing oral sex on him with protection (condom) the WHOLE TIME. Until we have all of this firmly established, we can't offer such an optimistic perspective.
THERE IS A RISK!
Maybe you have some knowledge I don't have. Are you an expert moderator on this website?
THERE IS A RISK!
Maybe you have some knowledge I don't have. Are you an expert moderator on this website?
This cheater used a condom. He had no risk, does NOT need to test, and his loved one is not at risk. END OF STORY.
Yes, get tested...
From a female perspective, it's totally not cool at all to put someone you love at a risk she of which she is not aware. Please, please, PLEASE protect her. Even if the risk is small, if you could come up with some way to use protection (and not perform or receive oral sex) until all your test results are back, that would be the most respectful and loving thing you could do for your future wife.
Back to the tests...Please speak with your healthcare provider. I would recommend 4 months. At that point HepC, Syphillis, HSV IgG 1 & 2, bacterial STDs, and MOST HIV tests that would come back positive would come back positive by 4 months after your exposure to a prostitute. Thanks for at least wearing protection while you cheated. That at least shows some level of respect. I wish all cheaters used condoms.
From a female perspective, it's totally not cool at all to put someone you love at a risk she of which she is not aware. Please, please, PLEASE protect her. Even if the risk is small, if you could come up with some way to use protection (and not perform or receive oral sex) until all your test results are back, that would be the most respectful and loving thing you could do for your future wife.
Back to the tests...Please speak with your healthcare provider. I would recommend 4 months. At that point HepC, Syphillis, HSV IgG 1 & 2, bacterial STDs, and MOST HIV tests that would come back positive would come back positive by 4 months after your exposure to a prostitute. Thanks for at least wearing protection while you cheated. That at least shows some level of respect. I wish all cheaters used condoms.
You gotta choose what's right for you. I confessed to my wife that I did something I shouldn't have and now have a pissed off wife. Some can handle knowing and learning. I wish I was one. Others must confess and take what comes. Only you know you.
It seems protected sex is safe sex and that bing true, no hiv or other stuff. Thing is, can you handle knowing what you did, slap yourself on the hand and do the right thing from here on? Remember... you are not married.
It seems protected sex is safe sex and that bing true, no hiv or other stuff. Thing is, can you handle knowing what you did, slap yourself on the hand and do the right thing from here on? Remember... you are not married.
He doesn't need to worry about precum exposing his wife to HIV. He had protected sex with the prostitute so could not of gotten HIV to give to her. End of story.
I have read that its easier for a man to infect a women. Pre-*** has some risks, and like you said and I have read, repeted exposer ups the risk. You might want to find a way to tell here you want to use a condom, tell her its so you can *** in her mabey.
You had NO RISK from this encounter.
You had protected sex, so you couldn't of gotten HIV, and you can't give something you don't have to your fiance..
That kind of ***** you're marrying someone who isn't keeping you satisfied sexually. Gonna be a long ride man.
You had protected sex, so you couldn't of gotten HIV, and you can't give something you don't have to your fiance..
That kind of ***** you're marrying someone who isn't keeping you satisfied sexually. Gonna be a long ride man.
I understand where your at. I had the same situation a week and 1/2 ago. Since then I have beat the internet to death. Searching for answers and comfort alike. The only thing that scared me, was the little scars on my finger that I used. Anybody have any insight to transmission through scars above the cuticle, it was open the day I discovered it, but I bite my fingers constantly, so I might have created it that day. Just nervous and looking for some advice.
Thanks for the input, this was definitely the first and last. Knowing myself, I'm still gonna stress regularly over the next wseeks/months, and I'm definietly still getting tested. Any advice on testing intervals?
Thank you
Thank you
By the way, unless you plan on doing this again...Keep it to yourself. Live with your guilt instead of passing it on to another. Of course, if it becomes some type of regular thing for you, that's another story entirely.
No risk, you had protected sex. Everything you're feeling is due to guilt, not because there's a risk of HIV, which you already know. End of story.
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