Third freak-out in less than a week! =S

[vsentz]

Alright, this is getting really old....

I got my third freak out in less than a friggin' week! I swear my hormones are over the roof, I am just not myself when I get the 'hormone attack', and it's getting more and more as I get closer and closer!
First one was thursday when I came home from work and was gonna have dh's cousins over (from CT). It's bad as it is since all the rooms in my house are disaster zones. Maddie's room is under construction, the other guest room is packed with baby stuff and just cr**p in general..., and they were gonna have to stay in the living room... (yeah, where we left Maggie, my stupid dog, hang out while we were at work).... not the best move ever...., I came home and found my couch's cushion ripped in pieces (mind you, those couches are nice and almost new!!!), cushion case ripped and bones everywhere, shoes everywhere, and that nice dog smell all over the place!!!!!

OH MY GOD.... I just couldn't help it for freak out! dh was golfing, I tried calling him, didn't answer, i started getting so mad... what if something happened and there's dumba$$ golfing!!!?? without cellphone???

Needless to say I had to work my @$$ off to clean the room, scrub floors, repair couch, wash blankets, shampoo rug... blah blah blah... by the end of the day, I kid you not, i had bright red balloons for feet...

Second freak out....

So dh leaves to go to his dad's with his cousins and leaves stupid dog in the house without confining her (I was upstairs in the potty), and this lady at work made this EXQUISIT apple bread for me..., she put the time and the thought for me and i just felt so good, the bread was AMAZINGLY tasty so i decided to just cut a little piece so i could have it longer....
yeah right....

I come downstairs to find the bag the bread was in.... all ripped in pieces on my recently scrubbed living room....
and the dog licking her chops....

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I called dh and ripped his head off!!!! why in the LIVING HELL would he do that??? he knows!!! that damn dog is evil! and he leaves food on the counter where she can reach? not to mention leaves her unsupervised?!?!?!?!

Third freak out.....

Last night... I asked dh to cuddle with me and he got all grumpy and barely passed his arm over my back..... then i asked him what he felt for his daughter (since he never puts his stupid hand on my belly to feel her, nor he kisses her, nor talks to her!!!) and he just said 'oh... i dunno'....
I said 'why are you so afraid of being affectionate with your unborn child?!?' he goes 'im scared'... i said 'i am too, and that doesn't stop me from loving her!!!!' he goes 'im scared you'll freak out on the baby like you freak out on the dog'.....

And im just thinking... 'freaking out on the dog is a lot different than with my child!!!!'.... plus, yeah, i might freak out, burst, get over with it... and keep going! where as him, he freaks out 'calm', swallows it and lets it out caving up and being a jerk!!!

We spent hours talking, crying, yelling..... argh!!!! Our intimate life is down the toilet... (TMI..we haven't had any 'encounter' in like 3 to 4 months!! last time we tried I was too tired, told him i couldn't and ever since he just refuses to start anything!!) our romantic life is non-existant and with baby and parents coming... guess what!?!?!?! my marriage is F'ed up!!!!!

=(

I feel so ill today... we went to bed by 1am... and got up by 5:40 this morning! my stupid dog has stinky anal glands that not only explode every 2 weeks now, but in less than that she had an 'accident' again! so now i don't know if we need to take her to the vet to squeeze those damn things every week?!?!?!?! 15 dollars each time?!?!?!?! We do NOT have money!!!!!

I am so upset girls... i know i am being VERY stupid, and I feel LIKE A HORRIBLE MOM for making my baby so upset... she was squirming around the whole time!! and one time she kicked so hard i could actually HEAR! the kick!!!

=(

Anyways, thank you for 'listening' girls!! i needed to vent really bad.....

[melimeli]

ok I have no dog... but it sounds like it is time you made him an outside dog haha...  

you are going to be a great mommy... don't even worry...

I hope things will get better, dh will come around once that baby is born...  just have to stick it out a few more days... you are almost there...

when does mom come??

[vsentz]

Thank you girl! =) make 'em margaritas for me please!!! (yum!)

[vsentz]

Tina! you just made me laugh and breath girlfriend! =) i knew it was stupid... but now i know it is COMICAL!!! i am so darn anal about everything.... ya know? it's just been hard for the past 2 years (five if you ask me... since I met dh and came up to a lovely, but different country!)
First trying to adjust to our marriage, not having money, then the loss of our little one..., then my daddy's surgery, then my mom's accident... and slow recovery (and seeing her suffer so much)!!!!  and then the complications and aches and pains of this pregnancy...(don't take me wrong, i'll go thru this and more for my princess any day!)... and trying to educate a puppy that is massively destructive and hyper.....

OH GOSH! it had taken a toll on me!

still funny tho, i'm glad you came and gave me your words... it's good to see it from an outside point of view, and realize that one day i'll look back (maybe even tomorrow?) and laugh about these cr%p...

[vsentz]

Thank you Jenny! makes me feel like im  really not that crazy after all.... ;)
Man! i know exactly what you're talking about! I would freak out too! I have a cat (indoor, thank goodness) and two ferrets... yeah, we are crazy, we love our fur babies and they are so special to us! I would never get rid of my dog, or cat just for these kinds of things, so i can completely relate to what you're talking about... but at the same time, i want to prevent baby to crawl over cat puke, or where the dog had scoot!...
I guess we will learn to live with all this like Kellie said, and we will make it work, but in the mean time: I wish i could just put my baby in a crystal bubble and isolate her from all germs, dangers and nasty stuff! =S my mother makes fun of me saying that when I change a diaper or when the dog licks her I'll dip my poor kid in desinfectant! lol...

Hey, that doesn't sound too bad of an idea after all! lol ;)

[1nana]

I'll have 3 drinks for you!!! Cheer up.....you almost have that precious baby in your arms.

[tina1111]

I think you have all the makings for a great sitcom! You should call NBC and see if they want to buy your ideas, lol.

Seriously though, I am sorry it is so hard right now. You must be an emotional wreck! The things we tolerate for the love of our pets. I have 3 cats(one nasty mean old bit@h), a tortoise, an 80gal aquarium and a betta. I feed about 40 squirrels in the back yard every night, too. (still miss the Wee-man) Tim doesn't like animals and I run a freakin' farm. We clash at least once a week on the animal issue.

I think we all want our moms there, then worry if they will try to take over. You worry about every little detail and think the worst case scenario for each detail. Truth is, it's all going to be fine. You're going to be a great mom, the dog is NOT going to eat your baby and things will get back to normal eventually. Dh is going to love that little girl more than life itself. He's scared too. Men just don't act/react the same as women do. Once that beautiful baby is in his arms, he's going to melt away.

As for the puppy hiney, it's a necessary evil on some dogs and believe it or not some cats. One of mine has to have it done, too. Fortunately, only like once a yr. But, many dogs have it done every week or two. My friend has 2 dogs that need it regular and he started doing it himself. It's quite icky, but can be done at home if you're not faint of heart. ((((hugs))))

Find yourself a happy place for a while and just unwind. In the meantime, I'll have a drink for you :)