vent!

[shelbyxox]

Anyone ever feel like they would just be better off raising their babies by themselves? I am very lucky to have the support of my daughters father, but lately everything he does makes me mad! I hate feeling this way, but he just seems so immature sometimes. it seems like his main priority is the gym right now and buying things for working out. I sort of understand his perspective because he isn't a dad yet, and he hasn't really had a chance to bond with her, but I feel like he won't mature after she's here. Also, some of the things he says about how he's going to raise her I don't agree with and he knows that, but he insists on saying it anyway. Sorry this is so long, I'm just frustrated!

[Meggie_Smith]

I have been feeling the same exact way from the same reasons. His immaturity level and the stress level he adds to my life everyday knowing its not food for the baby. But the I go back and think to before I was pregnant and how madly in love with him I was and how the feeling didn't change for him until about two months into the pregnancy. Sometimes I think I might be over reacting due to the stress of already being pregnant. Hormones and everything. I think if you are in love with the man maybe you should stick it out and see if things change when the baby arrives. I grew up with out a father and I don't want my child going through the same things I did. I know he'll be a good father to our child and that I'm stressed to the Max right now and maybe I take a little bit too much of that and focus it on him. So as much as I do think about leaving I know its best, to try to stick it out and hope for change when my child arrives and he sees his child's face for the first time. If things don't change I'll have no regrets or what ifs about leaving cause I know that I gave my all instead of giving up cause that always seem the easiest route to take. If you stick in there and give him the chance to see yours and his beautiful child's face he may have a change of heart if not then you'll be left with no regrets if you deside to leave.

[My2princesses]

I've also had those feelings. I do everything myself from laundry, to cleaning our room. Everything & it's really been getting to me. I can't deal with much of it. Although I only have 2 more weeks left I have just been very upset. & I hope before our daughter is born he matures.

[shelbyxox]

Yes lol idk what I would do without him!

[ladyluv715]

Yea I have all the big stuff too!!!!!! Ugh men lol but we do need them!!!!!

[shelbyxox]

Scan whatever you want lol people won't buy everything on there anyways. I think I had like 60 something things on my babies r us and 28 on Walmart. Barely anyone bought off the BRU one, and I scanned a lot of sheets and single pack bottles, stuff like that because we already bought the big things.

[ladyluv715]

Yea I tried but he didn't want to.....he was going to act like a little child asking when it's time to go and he also told me to not asked for things because they r cute......he said I should only be scanning like thirty things.....I'm like Yea dude u have soooooo much to wake up to!!!!!!  I have 184 items on baby's r us n about 100-120 on walmarts!!!!!

[shelbyxox]

Ladyluv, I could go on all night too lol ;p but the main one is the gym. Your boyfriend should definitely register with you, that's one the fun parts in pregnancy. He doesn't have to buy anything, and maybe it will wake him up a little on how much everything is going to cost. Kate037, I never bring up sports, he's the one thinking that far ahead... I'm taking it one day at a time!

[ladyluv715]

And I have tried to talk and reason and suggest other options or explain my situation and it just ends up in an argument.....right now I bring more money home because his job is horrible so he knows he has to find another job but he just doesn't understand what expenses will come just in one day.....the day before we give birth is the last day of life as we know it for first timers.....in just one day EVERYTHING changes and he hasn't quite grasped that!!!! Oh boy am I patiently waiting lol

[ladyluv715]

Yea see mine doesn't wanna go to the gym....he wants his windows tinted and summer clothes and this and that like I could go on all night......he has only purchased with his own money two onsies that he got from Spencer's only cuz they say something funny on them!!! Oh dear lord I hope he wakes up when he holds her!!!!

[Kate037]

Sports are going to be a couple years off, so there us plenty of time to talk about it! There are very many options so you never know what they'll end up liking :)

[Kate037]

I agree he should help with the money, maybe you can just tell him straight up how much you need to cover half of everything. And then enjoy picking out what you like!  :) I have  been having so much fun looking at everything and price matching, he days as long as I'm happy he's happy. And it just works.

[shelbyxox]

I feel horrible, too! Like he's always so sweet and does so much for me, I feel bad getting frustrated at him. I am hoping it changes for us when our babies are born ladyluv715. With him, he's always talking about getting her into sports and that he's going to make her play sports.. I'm not a big sports fan, but I tolerate them and he knows this. If she wants to do sports its one thing, but I'm not going to make her do anything she doesn't want to do. And I don't think he fully realizes that what he's worrying about now, like the gym, isn't gonna matter once she's here. He won't have time to think about the gym.

[ladyluv715]

Yea I agree but when I'm struggling to open an account for her savings, a life insurance policy and getting her room together and registering alone because he didn't wanna come and all this other stuff WE should be doing just doesn't phase him!!!!!! Drives me crazy!!!!!

[Kate037]

I think the thing is, guys have a different mentality then girls do. So things that seem important to us might not be so for them, and vice versa. I think of it in the long run, he's going to be the one that's there, and just because we don't agree on everything we can at least try to compromise. I love my hubby, and he loves us, at the end of the day that's all that matters :)

[ladyluv715]

Short and sweet......SO NOT THE ONLY ONE!!!!! I love my boyfriend to death we have been together for 6 years n I'm 6 months pregnant with a little girl....he has always said he wanted a family with me and seems excited when he does talk about her but it's all material things he talks about.....buying her this and getting her that but he's not talking about a crib or mattress no he's talking about a pair of Jeremy Scott crib shoes that are about 250 a pair.....it's just so sickening when he says things like this.....what gets me is that I feel horrible saying things about him because he has been there for me when he is there since our living situation has changed but he goes to every appointment and I know he's gonna be a great dad.....it's just the maturity level I can't handle anymore sorry so long but girl this post explains my mood for the last month!!!!

[shelbyxox]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way!

[AnnieBrooke]

I've been married for years, and occasionally think it would be simpler if I was a single mom.  My husband complains about the state of the house (it is apparently my job alone to clean it) and wants my time to help with his business.  A child is a big interruption for a self-involved man.  

On the other hand, he LOVES our son, and right now is off with him so I can have some alone time [to clean the house].  I appreciate someone being here to take the 24/7 load off of me with our son, even if it is just so I can clean in peace and quiet.  (Kids are very demanding, too.)  And my husband does not complain about money, and he goes to the doctor appointments with me when our son is sick, etc.  And he didn't complain when I wanted another child, which I might expect him to do if he likes the peaceful life we had before a child came.

For me the test really is, when my husband is gone, I really miss him.  So I guess it is a balance, in the end.

[shelbyxox]

I'm so sorry, that makes my rant look minuscule! He should realize what he has before its too late. You and your baby deserve more than that!

[shelbyxox]

I'm glad that things worked out for you and he matured! This is like the only real "problem" we've had in our relationship, usually we agree on everything. Which probably won't happen anymore haha :p

[krizmart]

I feel the same way about my fiance. It takes a toll on us females after a while. I've just decided a couple of days ago that I am going keep praying and to wait until the baby is here to give him a chance to prove me wrong and show me that he is mature and focused enough to raise our child together,and if not then i will definitely be raising my baby boy on my own. Its not what I want but sometimes you gotta do whats best.

[TiffanyPhelps]

I feel like this because my babys father would rather be drinking and spending money on himself and when I say we need to get something for the baby he complains about money! Ive bought basically everything and he hasnt helped with anything but the creation of her. And since we dont.live together he ******* because she will be living with me and not him. Oh and.he hasnt been to a single appointment! Ugh. Sorry for my rant but you are not alone!

[jessicaann21]

My son is two months old and I still feel like that all the time. I love his dad and so glad he's there for Jude but we don't agree on everything. But it would be so much harder if he wasn't involved. But my boyfriend was the same way while I was pregnant and he started acting more mature when Jude was born. It probably is because he doesn't have a connection with her yet. Hopefully it gets better for you!