Feeling like a failure. What to do

[ProudMommie21]

21 one 2 yrold girl & 5 months pregnant with my son. I live with my parents, I'm a student but probably won't get to go. I feel like I have nothing & I'm letting my fam down. My boyfriend is making me feel bad for being pregnant I'm just feeling like rock bottom is near. I don't drive, no career, no job but I have two kids. I feel like no one will ever want me only to use me, even my own boyfriend he says nice things but hasn't moved forward with our relationship & now me having this baby is causing us to grow apart. I haven't seen him in almost a month although his car is down he still use to find a way to me. I'm so alone in this pregnancy again.

Anyone else felt like this? How did u get out of this slump? I'm damn near depressed & have to fake it around my fam they don't even know im preg yet.

[20mommy20]

To start get Ur driving taken care of....so important for Ur freedom and taking care of Ur lil ones. There are also lord of great online colleges that even help u find jobs after words. There are also jobs u can work from home. Medical transcriptionist is one. I know stratford online schools are one that finds u a job afterwards. It's really scary now u will taking care of two other people not including Ur self. It's so possible though n doing the littlest things like being able to drive will make u feel so much better n be a big step in the right direction. Don't worry about Ur bf or family honestly its nice Thier there but in the end its Ur responsible for the kids. I hope u check into some other schools the one I listed is also affordable! U can pay payments as low as 30 a month ull Jus be paying longer is all. Best of luck n don't think Ur never gonna be wanted there's someone for everyone and Ur not worthless if u were u wouldn't be concerned for what's ahead of u n Ur children.

[MamaBear0612]

I think the only think you can do when you feel like this is to make a plan and take a positive step forward. I would encourage you not to give up on your schooling; it's important, especially now that you have kids who will need the extra money you'll be able to get by having a college degree. Community colleges are affordable, and you can take classes online these days at least until your little ones get to a point where you can leave the house more. Maybe learn how to drive, or learn to do whatever it is that you need to do to not feel like this. I'm a list-maker; it makes everything concrete and gives you a specific plan to work from. Just realize that if you don't do something positive you'll very likely feel the same in a year, or 5 years from now, but taking a step forward will help you begin to claim your independence. I do think you'll feel less alone when you tell your family; that was the hardest part for me, feeling alone because I wasn't ready to share my news yet.

[lissylou9]

wow i feel for you......im 22 and have one daughter and had a very bad pregnancy experience as well, but when i had her it seemed like it all didnt matter anymore.
maybe if you go into your doctor or nurse and have a chat with them about it they could help. maybe its a bit more then pregnancy hormones???
also maybe you might need to build your self esteem a bit.....try setting yourself and your kids up in a house that you can call yours, if you need help and cant get it from family or your bf you can always goto quantum support (if it is were you live) or centerlink and they are always a great help in thats section..
with your bf, i dont know what to say about that....all i can say is im not with the father of my child anymore and im happyer then ever, it makes everything so much easier and beleive it or not i have met many guys who love kids and are great people so they are out there!
also maybe if you told your family that your pregnant they will support you more then you think.
when i felt down in my pregnancy i turned to one family member i trusted the most and who actually told me the truth on their oppinions looking in from the outside and it helped me alot, i also spoke to close friends.
you need to realise you do have a job, your a mum, and thats not just a fulltime job but 24/7 job and takes alot! your everything to your children and they should be everything in your mind to (not saying there not) but at the end of the day being a mum is one of the hardest jobs out their. oh and dont let him make you feel bad, if he wanted to avoid another baby entirly he should have taken the precautions :)

i hope it gets better for you

[breanna_d]

I was just contemplating posting about a similar issue! I feel like a failure as well, I am 29, I have 2 kids with my ex-husband & now I am pregnant with my new bfs baby (30 weeks). We decided this morning that we will have to give up our rent-to-own house & quit the small business we have. We r so far behind and owe money to everyone that it feels like we'll never be able to get out. We cant even afford xmas presents last xmas. I was in my 3rd year of my masters & got kicked out cause I couldn't pay for my courses :-(

But I am so sick of telling my older kids they can't have hot lunches at school, or money for the book fair or them not getting new school clothes this year because I can't afford it. They are talking about being poor & it kills me that they have to go without, I have ti do something!

So I am stressed & feeling guilty about dressing cause the affect it could have on the baby :-S I am sick all the time & things need ti change! I feel horrible but I am telling myself "it's hard to admitted defeat, but necessary in order.to move forward & grow". I know we are both upset fir different reasons but just know that u are not alone!

[mandamouse21]

i felt the same way when i was pregnant with my second child seemed like nothing was going right, everything was falling apart the bf at the time left me i had no job a car but no way to put gas in it lived with my parents and hid it from them till i was 6 months pregnant. it just got way better after i told my parents but if you ever want to talk you can message me.