Concerned mom to be (19 years old)

[MioAmore]

I just want to know if I would be a bad mother if I kept my child their father? I was living with my kids fyher and in the past he has been abusive I didnt up and leave (stupid I know) but I was raised forgive foreget I never thought it would happen again but it did when I foumd out I was pregnant I quickly moved out I guess u say me keeping the baby was my motivation to leave but before I move my kids father and his family  also wanted me to have an abortion so that is also what push me to move home. A few months went by and everyone seemed to be warmed up to the idea I was prego so I started going back around my kids father was more worried about selling weed and getting high and so I left him nd his family alone for good this time I blocked them on every social media and now his mom not him is threatening to take me to court but since the 2nd time I left I havent spoken to them for months now nd not going to drs visits should I be worried if they take me to court that he would get rights? I feel my baby would be better off with out the negitive around. Am I a bad mom for this?

[dorik314]

I suggest not putting his name on the birth certificate for a while. That way if you feel that he is abusive and neglectful, he has no rights. Also, if you gave the baby and him visitation right, make sure you supervise them.

[cwinchester]

Don't put his name on the birth certificate. His mom can get visitation, its called grandparents visitation. Consult with a lawyer and tell them about your BDs past (selling, using drugs.) And tell them you want mandatory drug tests.

[Galvez]

i think u did a great job by leaving him n getting away from the abuse n negativity. Dont put his name on the birth certificate n if they wana get nasty well bring up the fact that he sells n does weed cz i would be worried to leave my kid with somebody whoes around that.

[cheribaby53]

No not a bad mom at all congratulations for leaving!!!! I would suggest getting a restraining order on him ASAP for your own protection and it will work in your favor in court if you ever do have to go...no man should ever put his hands on you!
I hope all goes in your favor good luck and be strong :)

[Liz_zoey]

No hun, you're definitely not a bad mom. Actually I'd say you are an amazing mom for getting your child away from all that! Good for you, standing up for yourself and your baby. Are they saying all this in messages and texts? If so, save them. A judge will see them later and it will help your case alot. Also, you do not have to invite them to appointments if you don't feel comfortable with them there, that's your right to have a stress free environment. When the baby is born, you do not have to list a father on the birth certificate, and if he truly wants to be involved and in the babys life, he will have to prpve paternity to get any rights at all. Most lawyers will do free or cheap consultations, so I would highly suggest doing one, just to get your mind at ease. You have almost all the power here hun, not them. I'm in a similar situation, so I feel for you. Keep your head up hun, that baby is gonna be so grateful when he or she is older because they have such a strong mommy. :)

[wishes2891]

No you're not a bad mom. Sounds like you're doing the best and most responsible thing for your baby. I'm not sure how far his mom would get in court especially if the dad isn't too interested in being a part of the baby's life. Grandparents have minimal rights on their own. I would leave him off the birth certficate for a little more protection.

[alannahlee20]

Your not a bad mum for wanting to keeps ur child safe, however if they do end up taking u to court he is the childs father and has every right to see and spend time with his child, unless he does anything silly to harm the child in anyway or you can prove he isnt a fit father he has every right to see bubby, i went through this with my sons father,  get some legal advice on the issue that was you will have a little bit of information if this does happen, dont stress ur self our over it just look after you and bubby
Goodluck hun