Is it bad?

[Feishababy]

Is it bad or messed up of me to think that sometimes I wish I wasn't pregnant or that I could give up my son for adoption just because I don't want to give up my childhood? I'm 18 and 22 wks and 1 day and I mean I love my baby soo much, I love being able to feel him move around and I can't wait to see him and hold him and love him. But then I think of the fact that I'm going to be a single mom and won't find a guy ready to handle a baby anytime soon, and I mean I am sorta okay with that fact, it's my decision to keep my baby and raise him but then I talk to my ex's and I wish I wasn't pregnant so I could be back with these guys. Like there's this one guys he's not really an ex but more or less is one we we're juss never official and he has a new girlfriend now but wants to hang out with me and he's amazing, me and him have talked about having kids together but waay down the line and the fact that he pretty much was gonna be my one and only makes it hard to get over him and that he used what I was doing like talking about other guys on Facebook to get him to give me attention cuz I think he finally realized he wasn't ready to take on my responsibility, he's 21 now, and used me talking about those other guys, which it was really harmless, me juss saying they we're hitting on me juss so he would talk to me and give me the attention the other guys where, but he wasn't and said that we should see other people because he couldn't handle me talking about these other guys but in reality he stopped wanting to see my because he finally realized that he wasn't ready for a kid.

And it makes me feel bad that I'm pregnant and that I don't want to be just so I can go back to this guy.
I know thats wrong but its hard going from something that was wanted to people see me walking down the street with a sneer and think "Oh look here's another teen mom"  

[KTowne]

By the actions you've both made, you and the guy you want to be with, it kind of seems like it's not a forever and always kind of relationship. If you were both serious about being together, you would be, there would be NOTHING stopping you. And if he loved you as much as you think he does, he'd be with you, baby or not. Giving up a child for a man that isn't 100% committed to you and your child, when your child is going to be 100% committed to you, is definitely NOT a good idea. You will regret it if you do give the baby up, then he leaves you, and you have nothing, you let the most important thing in your life go for someone who isn't going to be there for the rest of your life. I was 17 when I got pregnant, the feelings you are feeling will go away. I knew going into my pregnancy, I made that decision, and now I'll deal with it, no matter what consequences I have to face for it, because I chose it. I hope it passes quickly for you hun, and I hope you find an amazing man that will treat you and your baby the way you should be.

[Toni100388]

Well Hun, ur wishing u werent pregnant so that u could be with different guys? Isn't that why ur pregnant in the first place? I hope everything works out for u. Baby doesn't need to suffer because u don't wanna give up ur youthful activities. I'm not for adoption but I will be if it means the baby will get the proper attention he/she needs. On the other hand ur 18. Responsibility, I mean real life responsibilities such as this, are going to constantly befall on u so just think about it. And really prioritize

[CarolinaLopez93]

Honey is normal for you to feel this way , I feel like that sometimes... Im 19  and am 21w3d and my husband left me less then a month ago, ever since that happen im only thinking if i can really do this on my own, What hurts the most is that i had promise my baby girl to give her everything i didnt have as child including a family , mom and dad together, and i find myself wondering about given her up to a real family some one that can give her everything. But then i feel her move and i realize that because of her i will become a better person , that she will be my motivation and strength, I love her too much ,shes my everything . You will never be alone again you going to have the most beautiful gift in the world . Man will come and go , your baby will always be there with you.

[Feishababy]

I know I am really thinking hard about it and if I would be able to give him up in the end. I mean I will still have my youth it won't be gone forever but at times it feels like it will. Just sooo many emotions that I need to sort threw.

[Feishababy]

baby1forme - Thank you. I really just want him here now would help me.

texaslane528 - Thank you. I am trying really hard to be strong and take this day by day. It's good to know it gets better.

mommyofhayden_ - Well I've sorta considered it. But then I think of my family and how they would feel about everything, and then if I would even be able to go threw with an adoption. I'm not sure that once he is here if I will be able to give him up.

ritaandrobert - I hope so. Thank you.

Morrisfamily2012 - I know it will all work it self out down the line. It's juss hard to see it that way at this moment in time.

[Mamma2B2]

Yes adoption seems like a thing you should think about.. Especially if you are having these thoughts. You wouldnt want to have your baby and still feel this way, it would not be a fair choice for the baby. Please think about what you are ready for, and what you are not. He deserves unconditional love..you also need to figure out whats best for you.. And if having your youth is what you want, then please consider your options. Goodluck

[babyinJuly]

I think you being so young it's normal to have those feelings of missing out. I was 16 when my first son was born, and it changed my life FOR THE BETTER!!! I couldn't live without my babies. By the time I was 22 I already had 4 kids. I just had my lil man 19 days ago, never thought I'd have kids again being 34 now. I love him so much, the love for your child is so overwhelming no one could take that place. A man could burn you in a heart beat though and wouldn't even look back.  Just cuz you have a baby doesn't mean your life will end. Enjoy your pregnancy/baby!! Take care

[Morrisfamily2012]

if a guy doesn't want to be with you because you have a child then screw him. yeah it might be hard, but when it comes to relationships as a single mother the guy has to love you and your child. kind of a package deal. there are guys out there that will accept that you have a baby, and will love and treat you right. it might be rough while you are pregnant and while your baby is a newborn, but there will come a time when you find the right guy for you.

[ritaandrobert]

I'm 18 and my son is 6 months once u have ur baby ull see whats best for u

[mommyofhayden_]

Honestly, i believe adoption sounds like a good option. There are reasons you are feeling this way, there are so many families that want to welcome a baby into their lives and have both parents willing to be there. It would be more selfish to keep a baby when you are not ready to be a mother. I am in no way judging, it sounds to me like adoption could be a sensible decision for you. I wish you the best. :)

[brit0585]

I am sure once you have your baby all those thoughts will go away... It wont be easy and you know that but you are only 22 weeks. It will change so much when you are further along and feel him moving all the time and once you see your little man things will be different. Good luck to you.

[Feishababy]

I know it is. But I feel like it would be for the wrong reasons.

I can take care of him and make sure he is well provided for so he wont go with out. But I would be giving him up for a selfish reason.

I want to be a mom. Just sometimes it's hard to feel like I do when I have these selfish thoughts.

[mommyofhayden_]

Adoption is always an option, you should consider looking into this.